counseling treatment for someone who saw a murder

Full Answer

How can I help a loved one who has been murdered?

Connect with a National Organization —Organizations such as National Organization of Parents of Murdered Children, Inc., The Compassionate Friends: Supporting Family After a Child Dies, and C.O.P.S. (Concerns of Police Survivors), M.A.D.D. (Mothers Against Drunk Driving) can support loved ones after a homicide.

What do you say to someone going through a murder case?

In a murder case, the wounds keep being reopened. There is no chance to heal or move on. A state of limbo exists. Lawyers, courts, judges and a live criminal blessed with civil rights control your life. “You must be strong. Larry, your daughters and grandchildren need you now.” “You need to support each other now,” would be helpful. Nov ‘05 12

Is there a statute of limitations on murder in counseling?

There is no statute of limitations on murder, and as a ‘mandated reporter’ any therapist who heard such a confession would have to report it, or else risk losing their state license or psychotherapist registration. Those practicing counseling without such documentation can face felony charges.

What are some tips and resources for counselors after a shooting?

In the aftermath of recent shootings, ACA would like to provide some tips and resources for counselors and those they serve: Attend to self care. While it may seem counterintuitive to think about taking care of yourself first, you cannot be of service to others if you are unstable.

What is the use of cognitive behavioral therapy?

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) is often used to help victims of crime deal with the trauma they have experienced.

How does therapy help?

Therapy can provide support and advice on how to deal with feelings and emotions, reactions and responses to others and events in their lives. It can provide practical help to begin to address the areas of most concern and actively help an individual begin to move forward in a positive way.

What happens to family members of crime victims?

Family members of crime victims can also suffer trauma and psychological symptoms leaving them struggling to cope and severely impacting their daily lives. Often there are ongoing court cases that also need to be dealt with.

Is CBT good for older adults?

The researchers pilot study found the CBT therapy approach was effective at reducing depression and anxiety in these older adults. If results from the full study continue to support the use of such a support therapy package, this is an approach that could be rolled out across the UK to the great benefit of older victims of crime.

Is PTSD a crime?

PTSD is now a recognized disorder that can follow crime victimization. Flashbacks and nightmares, interpersonal distancing, cognitive function impairment, anger, grief, fear and anxiety – all are symptoms that can be present leaving a sufferer struggling to live with them day after day.

What is the grief of a family member who has been murdered?

The homicide of a family member or loved one is earth-shattering. There are so many mixed feelings — shock, anger, depression, and more, that swirl all at once, creating deeply rooted emotional wounds. The grief that comes with a murdered family member, friend, or loved one is different than most other forms of grief because it is unexpected.

How to help someone who has lost a loved one?

Avoid alcohol and drugs. Take care of your body by getting exercise, staying active, and socializing even if for just a little bit each day. Alcohol and drugs inhibit your ability to emotionally recover in the long-term. If speaking about your trauma is too difficult, try writing a letter to your lost loved one.

What are the feelings of a homicide victim?

This is often quickly followed by a deep depression with feelings of loneliness , which could lead the grieving person to isolate themselves.

How to talk about trauma?

If speaking about your trauma is too difficult, try writing a letter to your lost loved one. Tell them about your feelings of anger , sadness, or regret about their murder and the criminals involved . Put the letter in their casket or attach it to a helium balloon and release it into the air.

What are the reactions of a murdered family member?

The initial shock and sensations that any individuals feels after learning of a loved one’s murder are sudden, intense , and often challenging to understand . This unfortunate crisis can be even more difficult ...

How to deal with loss?

Start keeping a journal to free your emotions when they become overwhelming. Take up exercise, music, art, yoga, or any other creative means to relieve tension.

How to help someone who is grieving?

Simplify your life. Try to take away normal everyday stressors by taking time off work or school and stick to the bare essentials. Avoid alcohol and drugs.

When is grief compounded?

Grief will be compounded when a body is not found, when there is no trial, when a defendant has been found not guilty or when a sentence is deemed inadequate. The homicide victim may have previously been in trouble with the law or had a less than ‘innocent’ lifestyle. This can also affect compensation to relatives.

Why do people have additional sensitivities to homicide?

People who have been bereaved by homicide may have additional sensitivities because they have an uncertain status. If categorised as ‘secondary victims’, they may not be seen as having the status of someone who has been robbed of material property, even though what has been stolen is infinitely more valuable.

What happens at the end of a trial?

The end of the trial is a time when emotions start to become most acute, even if the client feels that justice has been done, and this can lead to a build-up of more (possibly hidden) stress. The loss of adrenalin can result in exhaustion and a sudden drop into deep depression.

What is it like to be in court?

Being in court is like attending a school meeting about your child at which you are not allowed to speak. Your presence is on condition that you don’t influence the jury by showing emotion. So please appreciate the new empowerment a client feels in being able to say anything they like to you during your sessions.

What is victim support?

Support After Murder and Manslaughter (SAMM) is a self-help charity run by and for people bereaved by homicide.

How does media affect grief?

Media attention often intrudes on personal grief to the extent of causing secondary victimisation. Your client may feel that the media has misrepresented the person who died and it is also possible that your client may be criticised. People with less than salutary lifestyles may find that the media do not respect their victimhood.#N#My father had a second heart attack on the day that a newspaper article appeared with the headline ‘Absent heroes are no use to anyone’ and a photograph of Liz.5#N#Some relatives do not have positive experiences of the police or may resent the legal system in general. Grief will be compounded when a body is not found, when there is no trial, when a defendant has been found not guilty or when a sentence is deemed inadequate. The homicide victim may have previously been in trouble with the law or had a less than ‘innocent’ lifestyle. This can also affect compensation to relatives.#N#The release of the offender (s) is likely to be a particularly difficult time for your client. An exclusion zone can be arranged but there may still be the fear of meeting that person on the street.#N#In December 2001 a man was sentenced to life in prison for Liz’s murder, with a tariff of 17 years.

Was Liz robbed and murdered?

Liz was unusual in being robbed and murdered on the street by two total strangers. No one in our family was under suspicion and therefore there was none of the blaming or taking of sides too commonly experienced by others.

What are the techniques used in grief counseling?

Three of the biggest things a good grief counselor can do for their client are to: Let them talk about the deceased; ask them about the person, and allow them to speak about their lost loved one in a safe space.

What is grief counseling?

Thus, grief is something that can be experienced in a wide range of situations, including the death of a loved one or a pet, the dissolution of a marriage, estrangement with a family member, or any other kind of significant loss. Grief counseling is intended to help the client grieve in a healthy manner, to understand and cope with ...

What to do if widow has lost appetite?

For example, if a widow is simply struggling to cope with the loss of her husband, she may seek grief counseling ; however, if she has lost her appetite and has had trouble sleeping for weeks, it may be a more serious problem that she seeks grief therapy for.

What are the poles of emotional grief?

The poles are “Intuitive Griever” and “Instrumental Griever.”. The Intuitive Griever experiences feelings associated with their grief intensely and is open with expressions of their grief (e.g., crying, lamenting their loss).

What is the difference between counseling and therapy?

In general, the difference between counseling and therapy is merely one of semantics. Both counseling and therapy use discussion between the client and the mental health professional to help the client address emotional, mental, or behavioral issues and solve problems.

How to help a survivor with grief?

Remind the survivor that it is normal to feel overwhelmed by the intensity of his/her feelings. Help him/her identify feelings of loss and feel pain. Acknowledge that pain is a part of the grief experience, but reassure him/her the pain will not always be so intense. Give him/her permission to cry.

What should be taken immediately after a death?

The very first step, that should be taken immediately following a death, is to call a halt to business as usual. Leaders should pause all nonessential activities and reschedule them to allow employees to process what has happened.

How to deal with grief?

Keep a journal, write a poem, or write a letter to your loved one as a way of processing your grief. Find a safe way to release your anger, perhaps in grief counseling or with understanding friends and family. With the initial involvement of law enforcement officials, news media, and even friends and family.

What does it mean to be a victim of a homicide?

A desire to avoid people and places that remind you of your loved one or of the homicide. Physical symptoms, like head or stomach aches, difficulty sleeping, eating or focusing. Blamed, isolated, exploited, or stigmatized by law enforcement, health care providers, news media, and your own friends and family.

Why is grief important?

Grief serves a very important purpose for each of us in a different way. Grief allow us to take in and acknowledge the person who has died. At first, grief could take form as denial or a separation from the idea that a person is gone forever.

How to rebuild a sense of safety?

Such as nightmares, flashbacks, fear, avoiding people and places. Slowly begin to rebuild a sense of safety, most likely with the help of a mental health professional. Grieve in Your Own Way: Not all those affected by homicide react in the same way. Allow yourself to grieve at your own pace.

How to get control of your life?

Regain a sense of control over your life by maintaining a basic structure and routine. Get enough rest, eat proper meals, and exercise regularly. Try something new like a class or hobby. Make healthy choices regarding alcohol and other drugs. Find ways to relax, such as with music, quiet time, watching TV or a movie.

How to say goodbye to a loved one?

Consider a religious or non-religious ritual , during which you can safely say goodbye to your loved one. Do something that honors your loved one: planting a memorial tree, enlarging a photograph and framing it, giving back to your community. Look at pictures of your loved one and remember your times together.

How to help a homicide survivor?

Obtaining individual or family counselling services with a therapist trained in trauma work can be very helpful to homicide survivors. Working through feelings of anger, revenge, fear and grief are important to your healing. It is especially important to contact a therapist when thoughts of self-harm or suicide are present.

How does a family grieve after a murder?

Each member of the family will grieve in a unique way, which may put them in conflict with other members of the family. It may be difficult for one person to comprehend why another is “dwelling on the murder” or involving themselves in the victims’ rights movement. This may cause family members to withdraw from each other emotionally. After the murder, family members may have to take on new responsibilities within the family unit. For example, a father may now have to assume child-rearing responsibilities while also being the wage earner. A woman may have been a wife and must now adjust to being a widow. Older siblings may have to help raise younger siblings.

How does homicide affect a family?

Homicide survivors may be impacted financially following the murder of their loved one. Homicide may mean a significant loss of income for a family, especially if the victim was the primary ‘breadwinner’. Survivors may be unable to return to work following the loss of the loved one for one reason or another. The possibility of losing the family home is real if mortgage payments cannot be made. Plans to return to or complete school may have to be postponed. There may be unexpected medical/funeral bills to pay.

What is the loss of self?

? Loss of self – a sense of having changed as a person; ? Loss of a sense of control over your life; ? Loss of independence – a greater dependence on other individuals or institutions to address the wrong done to you and your loved one; ? Loss of social support – increased feelings of isolation and loneliness; ? Loss of a sense of safety and security; ? Loss or questioning of faith or religion – survivors often question how God could let something like this happen to a person they love; ? Loss of a sense of community – physical loss of a member of one’s family; ? Disillusionment with the justice system; ? Pain in knowing that the victim suffered (especially in cases of sexual assault, torture or mutilation); ? A family member may be the suspect or the murderer; ? Nightmares of the loved one being murdered; and ? The murderer never being identified or caught -- the death lacks a sense of justice

Why are safety issues important to homicide survivors?

Safety issues are of primary concern to homicide survivors, as they know all too well that bad things can and do happen to good people. The reality hits that no one is completely safe and that no one is immortal.

Can good intentions interfere with healing?

Even people with the utmost of good intentions can sometimes interfere with the healing process. Survivors should be prepared to deal with people’s misguided attempts to be helpful, including comments such as,

Do homicide survivors feel like outcasts?

It is not uncommon for homicide survivors to feel like outcasts from society. Someone who has not had a loved one murdered may feel and act awkwardly around survivors. It is often very difficult for the rest of society to understand what homicide survivors are going through.

What is grief after murder?

Grief after murder has many expressions; our grief is as unique as a finger print. Some may want to get involved in the legal case, some may not. Others may want to face the murderer, others may not. Know that not finding the murderer will often cause complex and unresolved grief.

Why is grief so difficult after a murder?

Grief after a Murder. The grief of murder may be even more difficult to deal with than loss from a disease because the answer to “why” is always a third party. It is important for people to understand that gradually, in your own time, you can begin to find some solace with what has happened. In these situations, such as murder, it is vital ...

Why is murder so horrifying?

Murder is especially horrifying because another person’s actions took an innocent life. The idea that the tragic loss of a loved one can be determined by another person’s decision is devastating. It can also be incomprehensible that it can be a random act. The perpetrator may not be known to the victim or vice versa.

What to do when someone says "should forgive"?

A horrible injustice has been done to your loved one, family, friends and the world. Look for forgiveness on your time zone, not others. Forgiveness comes from within, not from a “should forgive” place. When friends tell you the stories of how a victim’s family found peace, just know they are in pain because they see you in pain. ...

Can the perpetrator be known to the victim?

The perpetrator may not be known to the victim or vice versa. The shock of losing someone to murder takes hold immediately and leaves family members totally bewildered. These are some thoughts I have seen in my work. My teachers have always been those who have dealt with loss directly.

How to deal with mass violence?

Remind yourself of people and events which are meaningful and comforting. Talk to others as needed. It is important to ask for help if you are having trouble recovering and everyday tasks seem difficult to manage. Here are some resources counselors can use to find out more about coping with mass violence:

What to do after ACA shooting?

In the aftermath of recent shootings, ACA would like to provide some tips and resources for counselors and those they serve: Attend to self care. While it may seem counterintuitive to think about taking care of yourself first, you cannot be of service to others if you are unstable.

How to manage emotional health?

Monitor all of your physical health needs - being sure to eat, sleep, exercise, and (if possible) maintain a normal daily routine. Pay attention to your emotional health . Remember that a wide range of feelings during these difficult times are common.

Thrust Into A New Galaxy

Who Can Help?

• It is surprising to discover that there is no publicly-funded system of professional counselling for people who have been bereaved by homicide. Hence your client may even be resenting having to pay for long-term therapy. Police family liaison officers provide brilliant support for the closest family until the investigations and trial are completed,...

See more on bacp.co.uk

Common Patterns

Other Complicating Experiences

Complicated Grief and Behaviour

Other Possible Problems

What Can A Therapist do?

Conquering Orienteers