Treatment FAQ

what will happen if you give a narcissist the silent treatment

by Jenifer Predovic Published 2 years ago Updated 2 years ago
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So what happens when you give a narcissist the silent treatment is that the tactic may backfire on you. Narcissists

Narcissism

Narcissism is the pursuit of gratification from vanity or egotistic admiration of one's idealised self image and attributes. The term originated from Greek mythology, where the young Narcissus fell in love with his own image reflected in a pool of water. Narcissism is a concept in psychoanalytic theory, which was popularly introduced in Sigmund Freud's essay On Narcissism. The American Psychiatric As…

will likely become more aggressive and turn your silence into a power struggle. Table of Contents

The silent treatment, while sometimes seemingly harmless when talking about it, can be a highly damaging and effective form of manipulation, coercion, and control used by toxic people. It is common, even though many victims feel alone and like they cant talk about it because no one will believe them or understand.Mar 12, 2020

Full Answer

How to get a narcissist to break the silent treatment?

Why We Give the Silent Treatment — And What to Do About It

  1. You Can’t Reward the Behavior. Many people find that appeasing the withdrawing person, and letting them sulk and stew or coaxing them out of it, as tantamount to giving ...
  2. Give Yourself Some Alone Time. In addition to picturing the silent person as a small baby in diapers, crying, I also like leaving. ...
  3. Talk — At the Right Time. ...
  4. Don’t Engage. ...

Why should we not trust a narcissist?

You can not trust a narcissist!! He will lie and present you the story from his point of view which is a distortion of reality. His story will change according to the situation, his advantage and the audience. Even confronted with proves he will lie, lie and lie some more but never does he take responsibility for his facts.

What does silent treatment by a narcissist mean?

The silent treatment is a manipulation tactic where a toxic narcissist will stop talking to you for days, hours, weeks, or even months to punish you for some perceived slight. It can cause severe emotional and psychological damage if you don’t realize what is happening. What is the goal of the silent treatment?

Why is there no cure for a narcissist?

Unfortunately for the NPD there is no medical treatment or cure for People with Narcissism. Research is lacking in this area tremendously! It is sad for the person affected by this personality disorder. And they will continue to ruin lives of others because they lack love, caring, support, kindness and thoughtfulness.

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What happens when you give silent treatment to narcissist?

Often, the result of the silent treatment is exactly what the person with narcissism wishes to create: a reaction from the target and a sense of control.

Should you give the narcissist the silent treatment?

5:048:54Giving A Narcissist The Silent Treatment - YouTubeYouTubeStart of suggested clipEnd of suggested clipBy a narcissist silence is the key to turning off a narcissist. And getting them off your back.MoreBy a narcissist silence is the key to turning off a narcissist. And getting them off your back.

What happens when you ignore the silent treatment?

According to a 2012 study, people who regularly feel ignored also report lower levels of self-esteem, belonging, and meaning in their lives. Because of this, the silent treatment can have an impact on the health of a relationship, even if the person who is silent is trying to avoid conflict.

What does cutting off all contact with a narcissist do to them?

Breaking up with a narcissist is likely to be a draining experience. Either they won't let you go without a fight, or they will discard you without looking back. Both experiences are extremely hurtful.

How do you make a narcissist miserable?

How to Make a Narcissist Miserable: 12 Things They Can't Stand Ignore them. Act indifferent toward them. Tell them how happy you are. Speak in facts, not emotions. Set boundaries and stick to them. Tell them no. Give them an ultimatum for commitment. Push them to answer to authority.More items...•

What happens when you chase a narcissist?

For narcissists, relationships are more like a business transaction. They love to be the center of attention. And, if you chase them, that is all the attention they need. It also further fuels their ego.

What type of person gives the silent treatment?

The silent treatment can happen in romantic relationships or any type of relationship, including between parents and children, friends, and co-workers. It can be a fleeting reaction to a situation in which one person feels angry, frustrated, or too overwhelmed to deal with a problem.

Why is the silent treatment so damaging?

The silent treatment is a particularly insidious form of abuse because it might force the victim to reconcile with the perpetrator in an effort to end the behavior, even if the victim doesn't know why they're apologizing. “It's especially controlling because it deprives both sides from weighing in,” Williams said.

How to deal with Narcissists?

If they happen to pass your way, then you can politely but firmly inform them that you aren’t interested in what they have to say. However, to get rid of them once and for all, you’ll have to resort to the silent treatment, a classic method of control. The best way to deal with a narcissist in this manner is to simply make yourself disappear.

What happens when you stand up to a narcissist?

They will try to make you feel like you are in the wrong for standing up for yourself, but remember that the only thing they care about is how you make them look. If you have a narcissist in your life, there is a good chance they have been making you feel victimized for a while.

What Happens When You Give a Narcissist the Silent Treatment?

This technique works because it makes the narcissist feel ignored and insignificant. This, in turn, will make them seek attention from someone else. The only downside to this is that you have to do it for a long time before it has any effect on the narcissist.

How to Deal with a Narcissist That Uses The Silent Treatment

Whether you’re dealing with an individual that you’re deeply in love with or someone you just met, the idea of walking away from a conversation that’s going nowhere can be daunting. But it doesn’t need to be. You can be assertive and say what you want instead of letting them dominate the conversation.

What does narcissist do when you ignore them?

In most cases, they don’t mean to be hurtful. Many narcissists genuinely don’t think they’re doing anything wrong. They’re just so obsessed with their own needs that they never think about anyone else’s. When they think you are ignoring them, they can’t control their temper, so they tend to lash out more easily.

Why The Silent Treatment Works?

The silence is important for two main reasons. Firstly, it stops the narcissist from being “the center of the universe.” By controlling what they can control, you’re able to get back at them for their behavior.

How To Give The Silent Treatment?

If you’re in a relationship with a narcissist, make sure that you say something nice and sweet to them before you give them the silent treatment. If your partner is a petty narcissist, they’ll probably respond with an even more petty response if you start this way. It might happen that if you are lucky enough you may get the silent narcissist.

1. Be independent

Narcissists are charming when you meet them the first time. They are full of empty promises and ideas. If someone with a narcissistic personality goes for a job interview, he may most likely get the job. This is because he knows just how to do it right, even though in the long run, he may be a bad worker.

2. Focus less on him

Narcissistic people love being in the spotlight, whether it’s positive or negative, they just love attention. They work so hard to be seen by everyone and could indulge you so much they make you unconsciously begin to keep aside your own desires to give them full attention.

3. Consciously set boundaries

Boundaries help toxic situations even though some people discover them late. A person with a narcissistic personality may feel he has the right to order you around, listen to your private conversations, or decide the choices you should make.

4. Give yourself more credit

One of the ways to keep yourself happy when you are in an abusive relationship is to find things to constantly keep you happy. A person with narcissistic behavior won’t do this for you. But they always expect it from you. You’re either a tool for them to achieve something or an obstacle.

5. Have an external support system

Your world does not revolve around anybody. If you are in a relationship and it’s unhealthy for you but you can’t avoid him, it’s time to go out and find other people you can talk to. In fact, talking to a narcissistic person could make you emotionally drained.

7. If you can, try to empathize with his feelings

A female doctor once spoke of her narcissistic ex-husband who always made travel plans without letting her know about them. He would arrive there, switch off his phones, and then get back home to blame her for not reaching out to him. To avoid trouble, she would listen to him like she understood how he felt even when she knew he was at fault.

What does silent treatment mean for a narcissist?

In other words, whenever the narcissist feels a decrease in their narcissist supply, he/she uses the big weapon of silent treatment on targets. So, if you want to know why your narcissist is giving you the silent treatment, you gotta trace out the incident that made him feel less valued.

How long does a narcissist's silent treatment last?

Narcissists have a huge patience in waiting for the narcissistic supply. Thus the narcissist’s silent treatment can long for days, weeks, months and even years also.

What happens during silent treatment?

So, during the silent treatment, you get confused and chase back the narcissist. Even if you did not chase, the narcissist knew that you are wondering and thinking about them continuously. This is what makes the narcissist’s ego satisfied and his longing for the narcissistic supply will be fulfilled.

What happens when you get irritated by a narcissist?

You get irritated, you get disturbed, You lose control of yourself and finally, You chase the narcissist and come to them. . And exactly this is what a narcissist expects and wants. By doing so, the narcissist automatically gains control over the relationship..

What is the silent treatment?

To be frank, the silent treatment is one of the narcissist’s cruel weapons used on people who love him. In other words, on the people from whom he gets that narcissistic supply. If you are in a relationship with a narcissist, you might already know how the silent treatment is like.. No calls..

Do narcissists leave their exes?

No matter how much rude they can be.. The narcissist never ever leaves a person from whom he gets the narcissistic supply. This is the reason why many narcissists even try to get in contact with their exes even years after their breakup.

Do narcissists come back?

Narcissists do come back in most cases after the silent treatment. If you clearly observe narcissist patterns and deeply understand a narcissist’s past behaviours, you’ll figure out one thing. No matter how many new people narcissists meet.. No matter how much rude they can be..

Why is silent treatment harmful?

The silent treatment, while sometimes seemingly harmless when talking about it, can be a highly damaging and effective form of manipulation, coercion, and control used by toxic people. It is common, even though many victims feel alone and like they cant talk about it because no one will believe them or understand.

What is silent treatment?

The silent treatment can be defined as the following: a passive-aggressive form of emotional abuse in which displeasure, disapproval, and contempt is exhibited through nonverbal gestures while maintaining verbal silence. Basically, the silent treatment is a passive-aggressive behavior by which an abuser communicates some sort ...

What is the difference between silent treatment and time out?

The silent treatment, on the other hand, is destructive, indefinite, contemptuous, unilateral, and meant to alleviate the abusers sense of responsibility and allocate all the blame onto the victim. It is a manipulation tactic.

What is it called when you interact with a narcissist?

If you have ever interacted with a person who exhibits strong narcissistic or other dark personality traits, you have likely experienced what is known as the silent treatment .

Why do people take time out?

Instead, a time-out just allows people to gather their thoughts and calm their emotions so that they can re-approach one another in a loving and healthy manner at a later time. The time-out is meant to cause clarity and calmness, while the silent treatment results in ambiguity, confusion, and distress.

What is an example of a child doing something the parent disapproves of?

A child does something the parent disapproves of, often a very minor thing, and the parent starts ignoring them as punishment. It can involve withdrawing attention, ignoring the childs needs, stopping verbal communication, avoiding eye contact, or avoiding any engagement with the child.

Is it a silent treatment to not talk?

Not talking to simply cool down or communicating clearly that you need to be left alone is not the silent treatment and should not be mistaken as such. You are not intending to manipulate and cause distress during a time-out, nor are you purposefully withholding communication to control or coerce another person.

How to deal with a narcissist who is threatened?

When they are threatened, according to their psyche, to a compromise or a situation that they don’t want to be in, they will play their cards and want the other person to retrace their steps.

What happens if a narcissist draws a line in a relationship that is not acceptable

If a person draws a certain line in a relationship that is not acceptable to the narcissist but is very rational, even then the silent treatment may be meted out. It may seem weird but even if the narcissist is at fault and has been confronted for the same, ...

What does it mean when a narcissist feels his or her importance is being diluted?

When a narcissist feels that his or her importance is being diluted, their control is being challenged or they are not being the most rewarded one in the relationship, they will unleash a barrage of various ways to make the other person feel insignificant. One of the most common ways to do so is to bring in the silent treatment.

What is the relationship between a narcissist and a coworker?

While there can be various types of relationships with a narcissist; a person may have a narcissistic boss, a narcissistic friend or coworker, it is the narcissistic partner that causes the most painstaking trauma.

Why is a narcissist incapable of loving?

A narcissist is a self absorbed person and he or she is incapable of loving someone truly because they are actually in love with their own selves. There is nothing and no one more important than them and thus a narcissist will always remain aloof from the emotional investment that the other person may indulge in.

What is silent treatment?

Silent treatment is actually classified as a common form of emotional abuse, most likely to be deployed by a narcissist. It has been observed in most cases that the silent treatment is meted out to a victim when there is actually no fault on his or her part. It is purely the narcissist’s perspective and how they perceive a situation.

Can a narcissist convince a victim to go to therapy?

Since the silent treatment is already imposed, it is unlikely that the victim will be able to convince the narcissist to opt for therapy or at least a consultation with a psychiatrist. As the only option, the victim should walk out of the relationship or take some measures which can break the narcissistic silent treatment.

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