What to do if Your Spouse Refuses to Seek Help
- Be Gentle and Kind. Your approach to the situation will have a huge impact on how it plays out. ...
- Address Potential Underlying Factors. Mental health disorders can occur on their own, but they can also emerge because of other underlying factors.
- Try to Attend Counseling Together. ...
- Attend Online Counseling. ...
- Encourage In Whatever Ways You Can. ...
Full Answer
What should I do if my spouse won’t go to treatment?
If your spouse is unwilling to agree and adhere to a plan of treatment, your response will have to focus primarily on the need to protect yourself and the other members of your family from the negative fallout of his poor choices.
What to do if your loved one refuses mental health treatment?
If your loved one refuses to move forward, it’s useful to try to understand what is behind his reasons for refusing treatment and then address those issues. A person may refuse to accept mental health treatment for many reasons, including: He may believe it indicates he is a failure. It may make him feel more vulnerable.
What happens when a family member refuses to get treatment?
When someone you love refuses to get professional treatment for their mental health disorder—such as depression, bipolar disorder, or substance abuse—this can put you, as a family member, in a very uncomfortable and difficult position. You care for the person and can see that he or she needs help, but feel powerless and unable to just stand by.
What to do when an alcoholic refuses to go to treatment?
10 Steps to Take if an Alcoholic or Addict Refuses Treatment 1 Intervention. 2 Analyze Where You Are. 3 Positively Encourage Them. 4 When All Else Fails, Don’t Use Guilt. 5 Offer Support. 6 ... (more items)
What do you do when your spouse won't seek mental health help?
See a doctor. Ask your husband to see a medical professional, offer to make the appointment, and make sure to go with him or call the medical professional in advance to state his symptoms. Reach out.
What do you do when your husband refuses to go to therapy?
Here's a list of possibilities:Ask them why they object to couples therapy. ... Ask them what kind of therapist they would prefer. ... Ask them what location would be best for them. ... Ask if they'd be willing to look at a few therapist websites.Ask them if they'd be willing to talk to a couple of therapists on the phone.More items...•
Can you force your partner to go to therapy?
You can't force someone to go to therapy, but you can see if they're willing to try it. If your partner is reluctant, see if they'll compromise and try just a few sessions — with the agreement that they can end it at any time.
What do you do when your husband needs mental help?
Understand Your Spouse's Mental Illness You should also talk with your spouse about their personal experiences with their mental disorder. In addition to talking with your partner, seek the advice of medical professionals and counselors who specialize in your spouse's mental illness.
How do you help someone who won't get help?
Here are a few things to consider when working with your loved one who doesn't want help:Listen and validate. If your relationship is iffy, it doesn't hurt to just listen. ... Ask questions. ... Resist the urge to fix or give advice. ... Explore options together. ... Take care of yourself and find your own support.
Can a therapist tell you to leave your partner?
Only you can decide what to do with your marriage. The opinion of a psychologist is undoubtedly important, but do not make it the basis of your choice because it's you and your family who will have to live with the consequences, not your therapists or lawyers.
What is the Gottman Method?
The Gottman Method is an approach to couples therapy that includes a thorough assessment of the couple's relationship and integrates research-based interventions based on the Sound Relationship House Theory.
Will marriage counseling help a narcissist?
It's more accurate to say that people with narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) are in love with an idealized, grandiose image of themselves. But propping up their delusions of grandeur takes a lot of work—and that's where the dysfunctional attitudes and behaviors come in, and marriage counseling can help.
Why would a spouse refuse marriage counseling?
If your spouse refuses marriage counseling… Maybe you and your spouse have some recurring issues or unresolved problems that are causing trouble in your relationship. The two of you might be fighting a lot lately. Your spouse might have even asked for a separation, or you might suspect that he or she wants a divorce.
How do you live with a mentally ill husband?
Ask your partner how you can best support them, and listen to what they share with you. Build your own support system—this can include trusted friends, family members, or maybe even a support group—that you can lean on as you navigate your partner's mental illness.
When is it time to let go of a mentally ill person?
In some cases, the decision to leave is obvious. If physical abuse is present to any degree, and especially if the individual fears for their own life or well-being or that of their children, it's important to leave as soon as possible. Safety is the number one priority.
How do you divorce a mentally unstable person?
Divorcing Someone With A Mental Illness5 Considerations When Divorcing Someone with Mental Illness. Divorce can be a difficult process for everyone. ... Be Compassionate. No one chooses to be mentally ill. ... Keep Spousal Support in Mind. ... Give Them Time. ... Cut Yourself Some Slack. ... Don't Deny Child Custody.
How to deal with a spouse who refuses to seek medical care?
Consider seeing a counselor on your own to help deal with your mixture of feelings. It is important that you take care of yourself and accept your own feelings ...
How to get your spouse to stop refusing help?
Tell your spouse that you are worried. Talk to them about the fear you feel over this situation. Talk to your spouse about your own feelings related to the impact this refusal of help or treatment has on you. Accept your role as spouse and not as your spouse's parent.
What happens if my spouse refuses to get help?
If a spouse continues to refuse to get help, perhaps starting in counseling together may be a productive gateway to helping your spouse get their own personal help.
What does it mean when your spouse doesn't get help?
A spouse not getting needed help will unintentionally be sending a message to their spouse that he or she is not important enough to do so.
Can you threaten to leave a marriage?
Do not threaten to leave the marriage (unless you really mean it). A psychological issue can cause significant distress in a marriage. This is often trickier, as the spouse may lack insight into the problem. Both psychological and medical problems left untreated can begin to impact the entire family system.
What to do when your spouse is sick?
The ill spouse will also need ongoing professional help to do the hard work of “self-management”. And you must maintain your own work and social life, stay informed about your spouse’s illness, and be sure to seek out personal support from friends and family.
What to do when your spouse is mentally ill?
As the spouse of a mentally ill person, you typically have done a lot to help your partner get better, like look for the best doctor, be attentive and concerned, try to make things easier for them, honor their wishes and” wants, etc.
How to maintain a relationship with a mentally ill person?
One element of being able to maintain satisfactory relationship with a mentally ill person is that they learn to “manage” their own illness. This typically means your partner acknowledges their illness and works with a professional to understand and moderate the negative effects of the illness on her/himself and those around them.
Do you have to have insight into your own behavior to change it?
People don’t always have to have “insight” into their own issues to change their behaviors. One can change how they act if they can recognize that what they do is harmful to others. This is called “self-management” and does not require insight about what “causes” an action. article continues after advertisement.
Can a mentally ill spouse avoid the hard work of managing their own illness?
A mentally ill spouse may want to avoid the hard work of managing their own illness. Avoiding self-management of their mental illness can “benefit” them by allowing them to be less accountable and to not do the hard work it requires.
How to get your spouse to help you?
If your spouse has some physical ailments, go with them to their doctor. Send a letter or make a call ahead of time saying that your spouse is depressed and you need to get them some help. Bribe your spouse with dinner out or doing something they like, whatever it takes to get them to go.
How to help someone with depression?
Encourage them to be physically active. Even though this isn’t a formal depression therapy, exercise is proven to lift a person’s mood and help with depression recovery. 4. Have empathy for their situation but don’t blindly go along with all their negative comments and beliefs.
What happens when a depressed spouse refuses help?
When a Depressed Spouse Refuses Help. Having a depressed spouse and parent in the family creates a difficult problem. The parents are supposed to be the leaders, the example setters, the encouragers both to each other and to their children. When one of the adults has big mental health problems, this changes the balance and affects everyone.
How to help a depressed spouse?
Here are some ways to work around this. 1. Go to a counseling appointment together, say that them going will help you feel better (take the direct focus off them) 2. If your spouse has some physical ailments, go with them to their doctor.
Can a depressed spouse be in prison?
This isn’t pretty, but it is a problem many people with depressed spouses or partners face. Depression and other personality traits can trap a person in their own prison. Outside influence seems to have little effect on them coming out. It’s frustrating and can be even depressing for the healthy spouse.
What happens if your spouse is unwilling to agree to a treatment plan?
If your spouse is unwilling to agree and adhere to a plan of treatment, your response will have to focus primarily on the need to protect yourself and the other members of your family from the negative fallout of his poor choices.
What is the best treatment for depression?
For these reasons, optimal treatment consists of a combination of medication, therapy, and spiritual support. In most cases, medication (usually mood stabilizers, and if deemed appropriate by a physician, antidepressants) is indispensable, along with Christian counseling for the sufferer, his spouse, and sometimes his family. ...
What happens when someone you love refuses to get treatment?
When someone you love refuses to get professional treatment for their mental health disorder—such as depression, bipolar disorder, or substance abuse —this can put you, as a family member, in a very uncomfortable and difficult position. You care for the person and can see that he or she needs help, but feel powerless and unable to just stand by.
What does it mean to distancing yourself from a sick family member?
That, a lot of times, means distancing yourself from the sick family member who refused treatment. Everyone has limits, and when said mentally sick family member has a long history of repeated abusive behavior I say family members have a right to protect themselves from harm.
What are the areas of concern?
Common areas of concern are: alterations in overall appearance. decreased level of energy. fatigue. lack of interest in previously enjoyed people or activities. changes in sleep, appetite, or weight.
How old do you have to be to get a psychotic treatment?
You care for the person and can see that he or she needs help, but feel powerless and unable to just stand by. You cannot force anyone over the age of 18 into treatment, unless they pose a danger to themselves or others or show signs of psychotic thinking (which is not very common).
Why does my loved one refuse to move forward?
If your loved one refuses to move forward, it’s useful to try to understand what is behind his reasons for refusing treatment and then address those issues. A person may refuse to accept mental health treatment for many reasons, including: He may believe it indicates he is a failure.
Can elderly people not participate in treatment?
Other's won't participate, and, if they aren' t a danger to themselves or others, have a right to not participate in treatment. The author mentioned elderly people. Elderly people (probably over the age of 75 or so) didn't grow up with treatment options, and thus, many won' t participate in them.
Can an elderly parent be left alone?
If your family member who has depression is an elderly parent, you may have to arrange for someone to be with her so that she’s not left alone during the day when others in the family are away at work or school. Caring for someone is a full time job that is not easy. Good luck!
How do I get help for domestic violence?
If you have been experiencing domestic violence, reach out for help immediately through the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233. You can also go on the National Domestic Violence Hotline webpage for more resources.
What happens if you don't respect your spouse?
When your marriage lacks mutual respect, it is typically doomed unless something changes. Some psychologists say that respect is more important than love when it comes to factors that affect the success of a marriage. Here are some signs that your spouse is not respectful.
Why do people disrespect others?
Often, people are disrespectful due to poor self-esteem.
What does it mean when your spouse makes you feel less than you should be?
A spouse that makes you feel less than desired or needed is not respecting you. While no one is perfect, you spend your time trying to make your spouse and family feel loved and cared for. When your spouse is quick to make you feel as though you are less than you should be, it is a serious sign of disrespect.
What does it mean when your spouse doesn't respect you?
When your spouse respects you, they will acknowledge your accomplishments, both big and small. Not acknowledging what you have accomplished in your career, your household, or in some other way, is a sign that your spouse does not respect you.
How to contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline?
You can reach the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. For more resources visit the National Domestic Violence Hotline webpage. There are also times where both parties are toxic for each other. Disrespect in relationships is prevalent in toxic partnerships.
What does "We all deserve to be with someone who treats us kindly" mean?
The echoes of a partner’s harsh words can often be heard for years to come. Respect yourself enough to know when it is time to stand up for yourself. That may mean becoming more assertive or it may mean moving on." - Aaron Horn LMFT
When all else fails, don't use guilt?
When All Else Fails, Don’t Use Guilt. It’s very easy to mix up the thought of an ultimatum, and lecturing or guilting an addicted individual into ceasing their vice usage. Under no circumstances should you attempt to guilt them into quitting their addiction.
How does intervention help a family?
It may take time to heal emotionally, but the risks and rewards of an intervention are absolutely necessary to draw the line in the sand. Interventions deliver ultimatums and allow the family to express their concerns and their emotional pain in a constructive manner.
What is intervention therapy?
Interventions are designed to will the addict into becoming a patient; nobody who is forced to will heal on their own. Even if it comes with some pushing, an addict has to walk into that rehab via willpower. When it comes down to it, there are no surefire ways to reach the person that’s hiding inside.
Is denial helping anyone?
If you’re in denial, it’s not helping anyone. Even for those who haven’t dealt with a family member or a friend falling down the rabbit hole, it can be difficult to admit to yourself that their problems have gone on too long, and has become serious or life-threatening. While this doesn’t sound like it directly impacts the suffering addict, ...
Can doctors protect patients from addiction?
They’ll be better able to identify the issues and see past the excuses of the addict. Doctors will still protect doctor-patient confidentiality, but in their medical and professional opinions, they can also recommend courses of action to take, which can be very eye-opening for the addict.
Can withdrawal symptoms go with addiction?
While every single addiction is different, and potentially more harrowing than what you may find online, withdrawal symptoms and other synonymous aspects tend to go with their coupled addictions. It can help you prepare for the future and keep your eyes out for any signs of potential overdose.
What to do when things escalate to emotional abuse?
When things escalate to emotional abuse, you’re not in a healthy relationship. It’s time to put yourself first. If you believe the relationship is worth salvaging: Set firm boundaries about what acceptable behavior is and how you expect to be treated.
What to do when your spouse is silent?
If it’s your spouse or partner, you both may benefit from couples counseling or individual therapy to learn better ways to manage conflicts. When the silent treatment is part of the larger issue of emotional abuse, don’t blame yourself. It’s not your fault.
How to deal with emotional abuse?
Make it about you. Ignore it. Offer solutions. Stand up for yourself. What not to do. Signs of emotional abuse. Get help. Takeaway. If you’ve ever found yourself in a situation where you couldn’t get someone to talk to you, or even acknowledge you, you’ve experienced the silent treatment.
What is silent treatment?
The silent treatment can happen in romantic relationships or any type of relationship, including between parents and children, friends, and co-workers. It can be a fleeting reaction to a situation in which one person feels angry, frustrated, or too overwhelmed to deal with a problem.
Why do people go silent?
But some people use the silent treatment as a tool for exerting power over someone or creating emotional distance.
Is silent treatment a good way to communicate?
While it’s not always malicious, the silent treatment certainly isn’t a healthy way to communicate. If the silent treatment looms large in your life, there are steps you can take to improve your relationship or remove yourself from an abusive situation. Last medically reviewed on April 30, 2019.
Is silent treatment always meant to inflict wounds?
The silent treatment isn’t always meant to inflict wounds. Sometimes, it’s an isolated incident that gets out of hand. You can let it slide until they come around and move on.
