Treatment FAQ

how to know who started the silent treatment

by Pablo Wehner Published 2 years ago Updated 2 years ago
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Here are four warning signs of disorder: The incident sparking the silent treatment was minor, or nonexistent If the individual’s reaction was way out of proportion to whatever happened, or if you don’t even know what happened, you’re likely dealing with a sociopath who is trying to control you.

Full Answer

What do you think about the silent treatment?

At best the silent treatment isan immature behavior used by spoiled brats and manipulativeindividuals. At worst, it is a weapon used by abusers to punish their victims.

How long did you spend in one long silent treatment?

I spent 20 years in one long silent treatment. The longer you are with them the more like them you become because it is the only way to survive. Don’t pay attention to the negative comments from people who have no idea of your experience.

Why am I getting the silent treatment from my husband?

I am getting the silent treatment because I pulled my husband up for saying you people referring to our kids when he was doing my daughters biology with her. He also said it has got nothing to do with you. he didn’t like it so I am getting the silent treatment. Leave him.

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What type of person gives the silent treatment?

The silent treatment can happen in romantic relationships or any type of relationship, including between parents and children, friends, and co-workers. It can be a fleeting reaction to a situation in which one person feels angry, frustrated, or too overwhelmed to deal with a problem.

How do I know if its the silent treatment?

Is it abuse?they intend to hurt another person with their silence.the silence lasts for extended periods of time.the silence only ends when they decide it does.they talk to other people but not to their partner.they seek alliances from others.they use silence to blame their partner and make them feel guilty.More items...•

What is the psychology behind the silent treatment?

The silent treatment is a particularly insidious form of abuse because it might force the victim to reconcile with the perpetrator in an effort to end the behavior, even if the victim doesn't know why they're apologizing. “It's especially controlling because it deprives both sides from weighing in,” Williams said.

How long should the silent treatment last?

Ideally no more than 1 hour, hopefully less. Say “I will be back in *** (time) to continue the discussion” even if you can only manage to come back to agree to close it down for the time being, or take the matter to counselling.

What Ignoring does to a person?

Research finds that feeling ignored can affect people's sensory perceptions, such as feeling that surroundings seem quieter. Being ignored creates feelings of self-doubt, feeling a lack of control, and feeling not worthy of attention.

What to do when he goes silent?

What To Do About Your Man's Sudden SilenceAsk him what he is thinking and feeling.Give him time to share at his own pace.Avoid giving him the dreaded 'silent treatment. 'Let him know how important his feelings are to you.Continue to share your feelings with him, so as to encourage him to do the same.

Is silence a form of emotional abuse?

This is a form of emotional abuse. It's normal to not want to talk to someone when you are angry or frustrated. In most cases, this happens occasionally and blows over. However, if a person regularly uses the silent treatment to influence or control your behavior, they are being emotionally abusive.

Is silent treatment a red flag?

The Silent Treatment is Your S.O.'s Main Conflict Technique If you're in a relationship, conflicts and arguments come with the territory. Managing these conflicts and working through them together are a necessary part of developing a healthy relationship, which makes the silent treatment a huge red flag.

Why is silence the best revenge?

Silence speaks volumes The best revenge is no reaction. Believe it, the silence and zero reaction really bothers your ex, and they consider it as the best served revenge. Nothing creates more curiosity than silence. Your ex would expect a vent or an angry rant from you, but don't give in.

What does the silent treatment do to a woman?

Findings from his in-depth analysis revealed that the silent treatment is 'tremendously' damaging to a relationship. It decreases relationship satisfaction for both partners, diminishes feelings of intimacy, and reduces the capacity to communicate in a way that's healthy and meaningful.

How do you break a silent relationship?

10 steps to break relationship silenceText a thoughtful message.Make a phone call.Apologize.Schedule a coffee date.Avoid reacting to toxicity.Give the other person space.Workshops or classes.Use the situation to create boundaries.More items...•

Why would a guy give you the silent treatment?

Many guys hate failing and feeling inadequate. They often don't have the speed of words to compete with their partner in a conflict. Men's emotional processing capacity is often much slower than their partner. Whilst being silent is a sign of a man's need to process it is also a way to avoid the feelings of defeat.

What is silent treatment?

The silent treatment can happen in romantic relationships or any type of relationship, including between parents and children, friends, and co-workers. It can be a fleeting reaction to a situation in which one person feels angry, frustrated, or too overwhelmed to deal with a problem.

When the silent treatment is part of the larger issue of emotional abuse, don't blame yourself. It's not?

When the silent treatment is part of the larger issue of emotional abuse, don’t blame yourself. It’s not your fault. You’re not responsible for their behavior, no matter what they tell you. If that person genuinely wants to change, they’ll get themselves into counseling.

How does silent treatment affect self esteem?

When it’s used regularly as a power play, it can make you feel rejected or excluded. This can have a huge effect on your self-esteem.

How to deal with emotional abuse?

Make it about you. Ignore it. Offer solutions. Stand up for yourself. What not to do. Signs of emotional abuse. Get help. Takeaway. If you’ve ever found yourself in a situation where you couldn’t get someone to talk to you, or even acknowledge you, you’ve experienced the silent treatment.

What to do when things escalate to emotional abuse?

When things escalate to emotional abuse, you’re not in a healthy relationship. It’s time to put yourself first. If you believe the relationship is worth salvaging: Set firm boundaries about what acceptable behavior is and how you expect to be treated.

Why do people go silent?

But some people use the silent treatment as a tool for exerting power over someone or creating emotional distance.

How to get clear on what you expect from each other?

Take turns listening and repeating what the other person says so you’re clear on what you expect of each other. If you’re in a romantic relationship, offer to go to couples counseling to learn some new tools.

What is the silent treatment?

As the term implies, someone who engages in the silent treatment stops talking to you. You want to communicate, and the other person refuses.

Is the individual expressing pain?

If you search online for information about the silent treatment, you’ll find articles saying that the individual is hurt or needs space in order to deal with whatever happened. The advice is to do nothing, give the person space, and talk when he or she is ready.

Sociopaths and the silent treatment

The most important thing to understand about sociopaths is that they are fundamentally incapable of a normal loving relationship. They do not have the ability to put another person’s needs before their own. They do not value human connection. The inability to love is the root of their personality disorder, and it will not change.

4 warning signs of a sociopathic silent treatment

How do you know whether the individual giving you the silent treatment is hurt or a sociopath? Here are four warning signs of disorder:

Escaping the damage

Sociopaths use the silent treatment to exert power and control over you, and it works. You feel like you’re wrong, a failure and not worth talking to. Each time you apologize for something you did not do, you lose a bit more of your self-esteem. The longer you stay in the relationship, the more worthless you will feel.

What is silent treatment?

The silent treatment is emotional abuse. When a victim is in a relationship with a person who causes the above mentioned distress, her mind and body remember how upsettingand anxiety provoking theprevioussilent treatment occurrences were.

Why is silent treatment not blatant?

The only person who really feels the silent treatment is the target. The person giving the silent treatment is not being overtly aggressive, abusive, or unkind in any visible way. This keeps himlooking “good” and reasonable.

Who said "Codependent no more"?

Melody Beattie, the Codependent No More author, has a great line for when a codependent doesn’tlike what the addict in herlife is doing. I think the quote is perfect for those dealing with the silent treatment. I recommend that you make it your own; it is: ” Celebrate the ‘no’!

Is silent treatment abusive?

Whether the person in your life is using the silent treatment immaturely or abusively, one thing is for sure, it is infuriating to receive; problems cannot bedealt with, conflicts remain unresolved, simple conversations are thwarted, and in the end, relationships employing this tactic become either toxic on nonexistent.

Why is silent treatment called the weapon of choice?

Generally, it’s called on as the weapon of choice because it’s powerful and it’s easy to get away with.

How many participants did Paul Schrodt study?

Paul Schrodt, PhD, Professor of Communication Studies reviewed 74 relationship studies which involved more than 14,000 participants. Findings from his in-depth analysis revealed that the silent treatment is ‘tremendously’ damaging to a relationship.

Does silent treatment damage a relationship?

Nobody engage s the silent treatment expecting it to damage the relationship, and that’s the danger.

Is mental health real?

6. Mental health is real here, depression and other thoughts are real by the the person being silent ( not being social is unhealthy medical fact).

Why do you have to stop the silent treatment?

You have to stop the silent treatment from being used against you in order to retain your self-esteem and dignity. There are a few ways you can learn how to win the silent treatment.

What to do if you are silent?

If you are experiencing the silent treatment from someone you love, then therapy may be the only answer. This only works if your partner is willing to go to therapy in order to move forward. Unfortunately, so many people like using the silent treatment and don’t want a therapist taking that weapon away.

What is selfish treatment?

The selfish. People who haven’t been taught to care effectively for others in a household will use the silent treatment on a regular basis. Selfish people care for themselves over others and when something doesn’t go their way, they ignore others to make a statement.

What happens when you are stuck in victim mentality?

So, when they are confronted with something they are doing wrong, they will grow silent and attempt to force their way.

What does it mean when someone gives you the silent treatment?

The person giving someone "the silent treatment" is trying to let their victim know they are displeased by taking their love away. Unfortunately what they are taking away is not their love. What is being taken away is their "approval" not love. The person using the tactic of "the silent treatment" feeds on the negative emotions of the victim. Typically the silent treatment is a real sign of a dysfunctional emotional life and immaturity. Often this type of emotional abuse is done by people with narcissistic tendencies.

What is silent treatment?

The "Silent treatment " is when you are engaged in a relationship with someone like a parent and child or a husband and wife and one person is not talking to the other as a means of punishing them.

What is the silent treatment of emotional abuse?

No discussion of emotional abuse through words would be complete without including the absence of words as a form of abuse. This is commonly known as "the silent treatment". Abusers punish their victims by refusing to speak to them or even acknowledge their presence. Through silence, the abusers communicate their displeasure, anger, frustration, ...

What is the silent treatment for narcissism?

The Silent Treatment [Types of Emotional Child Abuse Series, Part 1] – The Invisible Scar.

How does silent treatment make you feel?

How the Silent Treatment Makes Someone Feel. The silent treatment, even if it is brief , activates the anterior cingulate cortex- the part of the brain that detects physical pain. The initial pain is the same regardless of whether the exclusion is by strangers, close friends, or enemies.

Why is silent treatment so dangerous?

When someone engages in the silent treatment they typically are not intending to do harm. However, the damage that is done is enormous, which is why it is so dangerous. It gives the person it is being done to a feeling of "worthlessness".

How to deal with an abusive person?

What the Abuser Wants: 1 Put themselves in a position of control. 2 Quiet the victim's attempts at assertion. 3 Avoid any kind of conflict, resolution, personal responsibility, and/ or compromise. 4 Punish the victim for what he or she is perceiving to have been an insult to his or her ego.

How to get rid of the silent treatment?

2. Take a break. Familiarise yourself with a time-out (opens in a new tab). It’s a really useful strategy when you’re feeling too overwhelmed to think straight.

What does it mean when you use the silent treatment?

When you’re using the silent treatment, you’re attempting to manipulate and control your partner or spouse.

What does it mean when your partner stops talking to you?

If your partner seems to have stopped talking to you out of the blue or after a fight, clearly the two of you are having a conflict – even if you weren’t aware that you’d done something ‘wrong’.

Is silent treatment hurtful?

Being treated with the silent treatment is hurtful. You deserve better. So here are three steps you can undertake to encourage your partner to communicate in a more helpful way…

Can you change your partner's therapy?

you are not your partner’s therapist. you cannot change your partner, and neither should you change yourself to fit in with their demands beyond reasonable compromises. ‘giving back’ the silent treatment will result in a competition detrimental to the survival of your relationship.

Does silent treatment work?

The silent treatment can work if you’ve stopped dating someone who keeps bothering you.

Is silent treatment a sign of a toxic relationship?

At worst, it can be a sign of a toxic relationship. At best, it’s an unhealthy attempt to make upset and displeasure clear and to provoke guilt and atonement. The above steps will help you to handle the silent treatment with dignity.

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