how to handle silent treatment

How to respond when someone gives you the silent treatment?

Jun 05, 2018 · How to respond to the silent treatment with dignity. Step 1: Present your partner or spouse with the research. They need to know there’s good evidence that ignoring you is endangering the future of your ... Step 2: Write them a letter. …

Why do narcissists use silent treatment?

Jul 02, 2012 · How Do You Respond to the Silent Treatment? Let’s assume that you are on the receiving end of the silent treatment. There are a few options: 1. Do not contact your silencer. Accept it and move on with your own life. 2.

Why are you receiving the silent treatment?

Sep 06, 2018 · There are a few ways you can learn how to win the silent treatment. 1. Shrugging it off One way to understand how to win the silent treatment is to brush it off or ignore it. If you aren’t necessarily in a close relationship with the person who is giving you the silent treatment, you may be able to just move on and act like nothing happened.

How to respond to the silent treatment?

If your partner is using the silent treatment, here are some things you can do: 1. Set boundaries – You deserve respect and if they aren’t willing to give it to you then there need to be consequences. 2. Don’t engage – Engaging with a narcissist when they are giving you the silent treatment will ...

How do you outsmart the silent treatment?

You've changed your behavior to avoid getting the silent treatment.Take a gentle approach: Make it about them. ... Or, make it about you. ... Ignore it until it blows over. ... Offer solutions. ... Stand up for yourself.Apr 30, 2019

How long does the silent treatment last?

If the perpetrator still refuses to acknowledge the victim's existence for long periods of time, it might be right to leave the relationship. In the end, whether it lasts four hours or four decades, the silent treatment says more about the person doing it than it does about the person receiving it.Mar 26, 2021

What type of person does silent treatment?

Research. Researchers have found that the silent treatment is used by both men and women to terminate a partner's behaviors or words rather than to elicit them. 1 In abusive relationships, the silent treatment is used to manipulate the other person and to establish power over them.Jun 1, 2020

Is silent treatment manipulation?

The silent treatment, while sometimes seemingly harmless when talking about it, can be a highly damaging and effective form of manipulation, coercion, and control used by toxic people. It is common, even though many victims feel alone and like they cant talk about it because no one will believe them or understand.Mar 12, 2020

Why is silence the best revenge?

Silence speaks volumes Believe it, the silence and zero reaction really bothers your ex, and they consider it as the best served revenge. Nothing creates more curiosity than silence. Your ex would expect a vent or an angry rant from you, but don't give in. If you do, you are meeting their expectations.Sep 9, 2019

What does silence do to a woman?

Findings from his in-depth analysis revealed that the silent treatment is 'tremendously' damaging to a relationship. It decreases relationship satisfaction for both partners, diminishes feelings of intimacy, and reduces the capacity to communicate in a way that's healthy and meaningful.

What being ignored does to a person?

Key points. Research finds that feeling ignored can affect people's sensory perceptions, such as feeling that surroundings seem quieter. Being ignored creates feelings of self-doubt, feeling a lack of control, and feeling not worthy of attention.Jul 4, 2021

Why is the silent treatment so painful?

It can be extremely painful, as it involves the loss of the relationship as you know it. It involves the loss of connection, love, intimacy, and maybe even family participation, so can create real suffering around the silent person. It can also feel unfair and unkind, leading to anger and further fighting.

Is giving the silent treatment immature?

At best the silent treatment isan immature behavior used by spoiled brats and manipulativeindividuals. At worst, it is a weapon used by abusers to punish their victims.Jul 11, 2016

How do you break a silent relationship?

Backtrace your steps. Don't over assume. ... Make excuses for both parties. It'll be wrong to think you've done nothing wrong to deserve the unwarranted silence you're getting from your friend. ... Forgiveness. ... Understanding. ... Break the silence — talk softly.

How can the silent treatment backfire?

If done in a friendly, gentle manner,these gestures sends the message that you aren't taking them so seriously and it gives them permission to back down and not take themselves so seriously. If your colleague or boss has no sense of humor, or is truly a narcissist, this will backfire, so be careful!Nov 18, 2014

How do you break a silence after a fight?

7 ways to break the silence after a fight with a partner01/8​Had a fight with your partner? ... 02/8Send a romantic text message. ... 03/8​Make a call. ... 04/8​Apologise. ... 05/8​Plan a dinner or date. ... 06/8​The good old way of starting afresh the next day. ... 07/8Take help if the situation runs out of control. ... 08/8Forgive and forget.May 30, 2019

How to get rid of the silent treatment?

2. Take a break. Familiarise yourself with a time-out (opens in a new tab). It’s a really useful strategy when you’re feeling too overwhelmed to think straight.

What does it mean when your partner stops talking to you?

If your partner seems to have stopped talking to you out of the blue or after a fight, clearly the two of you are having a conflict – even if you weren’t aware that you’d done something ‘wrong’.

Why do I have to take a good look at my relationship?

If your partner or spouse has been giving you the silent treatment for a month, a week or even a day, I’d like you to take a good look at your relationship because chances are you’re in a toxic relationship. Perhaps that comes as a shock, or you’ve known all along that you’re in a bad relationship.

Is the silent treatment good?

No, the silent treatment is seldom a good idea. When you’re using the silent treatment, you’re attempting to manipulate and control your partner or spouse. I can understand your resorting to not responding to your partner or spouse if they continue to batter your ears over something you really don’t want to talk about.

Can you change your partner's therapy?

you are not your partner’s therapist. you cannot change your partner, and neither should you change yourself to fit in with their demands beyond reasonable compromises. ‘giving back’ the silent treatment will result in a competition detrimental to the survival of your relationship.

Is silent treatment a sign of a toxic relationship?

At worst, it can be a sign of a toxic relationship. At best, it’s an unhealthy attempt to make upset and displeasure clear and to provoke guilt and atonement. The above steps will help you to handle the silent treatment with dignity.

Is it safe to ignore your spouse?

Keep in mind…. there are no benefits of the silent treatment, though your spouse or partner may feel safer having built a wall of silence around them. you have the right to feel safe in your relationship – physically and emotionally – when your spouse ignores you, it’s hard to feel safe.

Why does the silent treatment hurt so much?

Being on the receiving end of this kind of treatment can be an emotional rollercoaster, you may feel isolated, angry, upset and confused. Essentially your brain is trying to solve a puzzle that it doesn’t have the answer to.

5 effective ways to respond to the silent treatment

Taking the silent treatment at face value, the first move is to opt for the softer approach and try to broach the subject of dispute.

Why the silent treatment needs to be banned

Professor Paul Schrodt is a leading figure in the research around why the silent treatment is bad for relationships.

Conclusion

After reading the article you should now know that unless there is a really good reason, the silent treatment should be avoided at all costs.

What is silent treatment?

The silent treatment is one of many tactics employed by emotional abuses. It makes one partner feel intimidated and powerless to the other. If you have tried to improve your communication with your loved one and they refuse to acknowledge their part in the silent treatment, you may have to go your separate ways.

Why do people use the silent treatment?

Also known as the “cold shoulder,” people sometimes use the silent treatment as a way to disengage from an argument while considering their options , or as a way to retaliate. Being the recipient of the silent treatment can make you feel invisible and manipulated.

How to calm down a silent person?

Use the space you get during the silent treatment to minimize the negative emotions you feel. Try some relaxation techniques such as guided imagery, deep breathing, progressive muscle relaxation, or gentle stretching to reduce anger and promote calm. [7]

How to deal with feeling manipulated?

Recognize that it won’t do any good for your relationship to display anger. Use the space you get during the silent treatment to minimize the negative emotions you feel.

What can I do to help my spouse with emotional abuse?

You can do individual, couples, or even family counseling. Whether you are dealing with a family member or spouse, participating in therapy can help you identify the roles both parties are playing in the silent treatment and break the cycle of emotional abuse.

What to do if you start apologizing?

In any case, if you start apologizing (and you don’t even know what you did wrong) or you start begging the person to pay attention to you, you are feeding the beast. Instead, take a silent treatment as a green light to collect yourself. Don’t show any anger. Don’t passive-aggressively force the person to talk to you.

How to make someone talk to you?

Don’t passive-aggressively force the person to talk to you. Don’t provoke an argument. Just give them and yourself some space until things simmer down. When you are around the person, strive to appear relaxed and positive. Don’t let on that the person’s behavior is negatively affecting you, even if it is.

Passive Aggressive Silent Treatment

The definition of passive-aggressive silent treatment behavior is when the person you want to have or fix relationship counters with the refusal to engage in any conflict resolution by giving you the cold shoulder.

How Long Will The Silent Treatment Last?

The effects of the silent treatment are the source of much of my depression and obesity

Depression and Obesity

You might wonder, what does the silent treatment have to do with losing weight or fighting depression with this New SIGECAPS guide.

How Silent Treatment Abuse Leads to Depression

It is natural for a person existing in the world to relate to their colleagues, their family, their friends.

The Walking Dead

People wield the silent treatment as a form of punishment, as a weapon against you to remove you from life.

How Do You Respond to the Silent Treatment?

Let’s assume that you are on the receiving end of the silent treatment.

Why do people use the silent treatment?

People who use the silent treatment to win arguments and gain control need to understand the magnitude of their immature behavior. Confrontation lets them know that you see what they are doing and you understand the tactics they use. After telling them the truth, you can laugh about it.

What to do if you are silent?

If you are experiencing the silent treatment from someone you love, then therapy may be the only answer. This only works if your partner is willing to go to therapy in order to move forward. Unfortunately, so many people like using the silent treatment and don’t want a therapist taking that weapon away.

What is selfish treatment?

The selfish. People who haven’t been taught to care effectively for others in a household will use the silent treatment on a regular basis. Selfish people care for themselves over others and when something doesn’t go their way, they ignore others to make a statement.

What does it mean when something isn't going their way?

When something isn’t going their way, they know that their silent treatment may be the only real key to turning the tables and getting exactly what they want, after all. Sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn’t. This all depends on the strength and maturity of their intended target. 2. The narcissist.

What is a narcissist?

The narcissist. The narcissist is a troubled and sad individual. Among their weapons of choice, like their other manipulation techniques, they also utilize the silent treatment. The narcissist, since they are void of all original inner substance, will use the silent treatment to further establish who they are.

How to win silent treatment?

1. Shrugging it off. One way to understand how to win the silent treatment is to brush it off or ignore it. If you aren’t necessarily in a close relationship with the person who is giving you the silent treatment, you may be able to just move on and act like nothing happened.

What happens when you are stuck in victim mentality?

So, when they are confronted with something they are doing wrong, they will grow silent and attempt to force their way.

What is silent treatment?

Psychologists consider the narcissistic silent treatment a form of abuse. It’s a popular form of mental torture used by narcissistic individuals, whereby they cut their victims off by not talking to them for extended periods of time.

What happens when a narcissist uses the silent treatment against you?

When a narcissist uses the silent treatment against you, he or she is playing an emotional game of chicken with your mind. You will be tempted to reach out and speak first. When you do, the narcissist will have considered your reconciliation action a form of “ flinching.”. In their gamebook, they win, and you lose.

What do narcissists do?

What narcissists typically engage in is an insidious psychological technique called “gaslighting.”. On a very simple level, it goes like this: The narcissist does something selfish, and you confront them about it. The narcissist then twists this event around to make it sound like you were the selfish one.

Why do narcissists use silent treatment?

Narcissists use the silent treatment as a tool for exerting power over someone or creating emotional distance.

What is the need to belong and feel accepted?

According to Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs, the need to belong and feel accepted falls under the basic needs of food, water, and safety. In fact, this need can be so strong, it can override the needs of food and safety. Psychologists consider the narcissistic silent treatment a form of abuse.

Do narcissists look good?

Narcissists are experts at reframing reality in a way that makes them look good and you look bad. While it can be infuriating and confusing, don’t fall for it. Stick to your guns. The silent treatment is never a healthy or functional way of dealing with problems in your relationship.

Can ghosts have their cake?

Although you may feel an overpowering urge to leave the lines of communication open for them despite their ghosting you, it’s best to ensure they can’t have their cake and eat it, too.