Treatment FAQ

how to deal with silent treatment from narcissist

by Dr. Makenzie Schmitt IV Published 2 years ago Updated 2 years ago
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  1. Set boundaries – You deserve respect and if they aren’t willing to give it to you then there need to be consequences. ...
  2. Don’t engage – Engaging with a narcissist when they are giving you the silent treatment will only prolong their pity party. ...
  3. Get support – It’s important to get an outside perspective when dealing with the silent treatment. ...

How to Respond When Someone Gives You the Silent Treatment
  1. When it's abusive.
  2. Make it about them.
  3. Make it about you.
  4. Ignore it.
  5. Offer solutions.
  6. Stand up for yourself.
  7. What not to do.
  8. Signs of emotional abuse.
Apr 30, 2019

Full Answer

What happens when you give a narcissist the silent treatment?

If you’re being given the narcissist silent treatment, there are a few things you can do to deal with it: Don’t take it personally – The narcissist is using the silent treatment as a way to manipulate and control you. It’s not... Don’t try to reason with them – Arguing is a waste of time. When ...

Why do narcissists give you the silent treatment?

Dec 13, 2020 · In my opinion, when dealing with a narcissist, the best solution is to go no contact and protect your energy. If you are able to go no contact right away, the best time always is now. A narcissist using the silent treatment or disappearance is a great time to make it permanent.

What does silent treatment by a narcissist mean?

5 Dealing With Narcissistic Silent Treatment5.1 Know What You Want5.2 Don’t Take It Personally5.3 Set Boundaries5.4 Don’t Enable Them5.5 Build Up Your Support System5.6 Practice Avoidance5.7 Talk To Therapist5.8 Avoid Engaging With Them5.9 Focus On Yourself 5.1 Know What You Want 5.2 Don’t Take It ...

How to get a narcissist to break the silent treatment?

Jun 02, 2014 · Silent treatment is a malicious tool used by the self absorbed narcissist type of person to manipulate others into conforming to narcissist desires. I …

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Why do narcissists give you silent treatment?

The Purpose of the Silent Treatment Essentially, the point of the silent treatment is to make the victim feel confused, stressed, guilty, ashamed, not good enough, or unstable enough so that they would do what the manipulator wants.Mar 12, 2020

How do you respond to silent treatment?

How to respondName the situation. Acknowledge that someone is using the silent treatment. ... Use 'I' statements. ... Acknowledge the other person's feelings. ... Apologize for words or actions. ... Cool off and arrange a time to resolve the issue. ... Avoid unhelpful responses.Jun 8, 2020

What type of person gives the silent treatment?

Research. Researchers have found that the silent treatment is used by both men and women to terminate a partner's behaviors or words rather than to elicit them. 1 In abusive relationships, the silent treatment is used to manipulate the other person and to establish power over them.Jun 1, 2020

Does silent treatment mean break up?

The silent treatment is a particularly toxic form of behavior that can lead to the breakdown of relationships. When a partner gives you the silent treatment, you might feel a crazy need to make him talk.

How do you deal with the silent treatment of a narcissist?

Not only is it emotionally exhausting, but it makes you feel like you’re completely worthless, and it can make you feel like you’re losing your mind! So what are you supposed to do when you’re the victim of the silent treatment?

Why Do Narcissists Give You the Silent Treatment?

It’s critical to recognize that while many people have times when they need to retreat to think about things, someone who cares about you will never use this abusive tactic to punish you. The silent treatment isn’t a tactic that a healthy person would use to manipulate you.

The Psychology of the Silent Treatment

In general, silent treatment can be intentional or accidental. However, sometimes it is used as a form of social control. At other times, it may indicate that the person has no respect for your value as a person and regards you as less than human. Regardless of its intent, using silent treatment toward others can have devastating consequences.

When the Silent Treatment Ends: Beware the Hoover

One last tip: when the narcissist decides the silent treatment is over, and they need your narcissistic supply again, they will do anything in their power to “suck you back in,” a move we call “the hoover maneuver .” Don’t fall for it – it’s not going to get better, and they’re not really planning to change.

Start Getting Help with Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Today

Online help is readily available for survivors of narcissistic abuse. Here are some options to begin healing from narcissistic abuse right away.

Why do narcissists use silent treatment?

Narcissists use the silent treatment as a tool for exerting power over someone or creating emotional distance.

What is silent treatment?

Psychologists consider the narcissistic silent treatment a form of abuse. It’s a popular form of mental torture used by narcissistic individuals, whereby they cut their victims off by not talking to them for extended periods of time.

What do narcissists do?

What narcissists typically engage in is an insidious psychological technique called “gaslighting.”. On a very simple level, it goes like this: The narcissist does something selfish, and you confront them about it. The narcissist then twists this event around to make it sound like you were the selfish one.

Do narcissists care about you?

But just try to drill this into your head: Narcissists really don’t care. This is especially true when they use silent treatment to punish you. They don’t have the same feelings of longing and remorse as you do after spending time apart. And they certainly don’t feel guilty about it.

Do narcissists look good?

Narcissists are experts at reframing reality in a way that makes them look good and you look bad. While it can be infuriating and confusing, don’t fall for it. Stick to your guns. The silent treatment is never a healthy or functional way of dealing with problems in your relationship.

Can ghosts have their cake?

Although you may feel an overpowering urge to leave the lines of communication open for them despite their ghosting you, it’s best to ensure they can’t have their cake and eat it, too.

Can you smell victory?

You can almost smell victory. And among the thousands of articles out there, all promising you instant results and an immediately healed life, one has caught your fancy. Just ignore the narcissist, they say. But there’s a problem. You’ve heard a lot of good things about ignoring a narcissist.

What is the silent treatment used by narcissists?

A very common form of manipulation used by narcissists is the silent treatment. When a narcissist uses the silent treatment, it can be a very draining and painful experience. It’s passive-aggressive and it can be very frustrating and result in a lot of stress and anxiety.

How to deal with a narcissist?

When dealing with a narcissist, you have to trust your intuition. It can be very hard to recognize you are not the one to blame, mostly because of earlier emotional abuse or experiences. Now, you can’t change their unhealthy behaviour and you’re not responsible for the behaviour of others.

What is silent treatment?

The silent treatment is a lack of healthy communication. Now, a narcissist doesn’t care about the feelings of others and might even like to play these manipulative games. A narcissist has a lack of empathy and seeks for narcissistic supply, which could be a search for ego-boosting, appreciation, drama, or control.

Is silent treatment painful?

When having to deal with the silent treatment, it can be a very draining and painful experience. It’s manipulative behaviour and a very unhealthy form of communication. From experience, I know how challenging it is to deal with narcissists and their manipulative behaviour. It’s essential to learn to protect yourself and your energy.

What does it mean to be silent with narcissists?

The silent treatment is a form of emotional abuse that no one deserves nor should tolerate. If an individual experiences this absence of communication, it is a sure sign that he or she needs to move on and heal.”

How to get rid of silent abuse?

Mystery. That could be the answer to your questions. I’m not sure the abuser has a good reason to use the silent treatment. Get to know yourself. Have a healthy self esteem. Continue to have love and compassion. Don’t let people change you.

What is silent treatment?

The silent treatment is a form of emotional abuse typically employed by people with narcissistic tendencies. It is designed to (1) place the abuser in a position of control; (2) silence the target’s attempts at assertion; (3) avoid conflict resolution/personal responsibility/compromise; or (4) punish the target for a perceived ego slight.

What to say when someone is not with you?

No can be trusted with out a reason. Words are weapons use them wisely. Think three times before you speak. Say something in your head. Then speak it. Always make it sound good. ‘ My father died’ or ” my dad passed away.” Body functions are always a bad topic . And remember your time is important don’t waste it on deaf ears.

How to love a boy who loves himself?

Every woman deserves to be pursued. It is not for you to fix him. Instead pray for him. Your boy loves himself so much and is blatantly inconsiderate of you. He’s probably moved on, but keeping the door to you open just in case he fails at his other prospects. It’s time for you to love you. Let go and let God. You seem like a loving woman, ive been where you are. Moving on is hard but the wounds heal and your vision gets clearer. Trust me, it gets better.

What is the worst thing about narcissists?

Worst thing about Narcissists is their incredible double standards and hypocrisy yet we keep on giving them the benefit of the doubt because our feelings are begging for forgiveness when all the time they are just taking advantage of our better nature.

How long does silent treatment last?

Silent treatment is a form o f abuse. Being married to my husband for 8 years now and every 4 or 6 months he engages in one. That will last for almost 2 months. Yes I said 2 months.

2 – Disengage

The last thing you want to do during the silent treatment is to reward the narcissist by engaging with them when they hoover after they’ve engaged in bad behavior.

3 – Turn the Narcissistic Silent Treatment into your victory cry

The third way to shut down a narcissist who is giving you the silent treatment is to use the opportunity to end the relationship and go no contact.

You Can Overcome the Narcissistic Silent Treatment

The bad side of staying in a relationship with a narcissist is that it keeps you stuck in a hopeless situation. Holding onto hope that the narcissist in your life will change is a pipe dream that leads to a wasted life.

How To Get Started On The Stages of Healing After Narcissistic Silent Treatment

Recovering from narcissistic abuse is hard, and it’s okay to admit you need help. If you’re ready to go deeper, check out the #1 therapist-approved online program for narcissistic abuse recovery. Thousands across the globe have benefited from this program that’s practical, proven, and reliable.

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Causes

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Narcissism is a personality disorder that stems from a persons psyche. Narcissism cannot be imbibed or induced. It is self developed. There are many reasons why a person may grow up to become a narcissist, in which dysfunctional families and several psychological factors play an integral role. When a narcissist feels that hi…
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Introduction

  • Being in a relationship with a narcissist can be very challenging and often unrewarding. Psychologists claim that a romantic relationship with a narcissist is actually based on a lie. A narcissist is a self absorbed person and he or she is incapable of loving someone truly because they are actually in love with their own selves. There is nothing and no one more important than …
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Characteristics

  • A narcissist has several tactics which he or she uses to control the person they are in a relationship with and they also invest their strategies to control the relationship itself. A narcissist is incapable of allowing himself or herself to go on a freewheeling ride where things are not under their control but that of lifes circumstances, which are a consequence of both people involved a…
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Mechanism

  • The silent treatment of a narcissist is almost like a self defense mechanism. When they are threatened, according to their psyche, to a compromise or a situation that they dont want to be in, they will play their cards and want the other person to retrace their steps.
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Effects

  • The silent treatment is pretty similar to a bad breakup. The narcissist will stop talking to the person, will not take their calls, not respond to the texts and if one is living in with the narcissist then there would be a cold shoulder at all times. There will be no confrontation, no emotional engagement or physical intimacy and the narcissist will actually behave in a manner that the oth…
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Treatment

  • The narcissistic silent treatment is very difficult to bear, especially in relationships that are relatively old or have progressed through the initial phases of dating. Unfortunately, it is difficult to counter the silent treatment without opting for intervention for the narcissist in the first place. If the problem is not cured at the root then the symptom of the silent treatment cannot be done a…
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