Treatment FAQ

borderline personllity treatment for people who dont want to change

by Dr. Clement DuBuque DDS Published 3 years ago Updated 2 years ago

Medication

While you can’t force them to seek treatment, you can take steps to improve communication, set healthy boundaries, and stabilize your relationship. People with borderline personality disorder (BPD) tend to have major difficulties with relationships, especially with those closest to them.

Therapy

Many people with borderline personality disorder refuse treatment. It is quite common for people with mental health problems to be resistant to the idea of seeking out treatment. Borderline personality disorder (BPD) is very treatable, yet many people with BPD deny that they have a problem or avoid getting help.

Self-care

Psychotherapy is the first-line treatment for people with borderline personality disorder. It can be provided one-on-one between the therapist and the patient or in a group setting. Therapist-led group sessions may help teach people with borderline personality disorder how to interact with others and how to express themselves effectively.

Should you force someone with borderline personality disorder to seek treatment?

Get affordable online counseling from BetterHelp or visit HelpGuide’s directory for free helplines and crisis resources. HelpGuide is reader supported. We may receive a commission if you sign up for BetterHelp through the provided link. Learn more. Recognizing the signs and symptoms of borderline personality disorder is not always easy.

Why do people with borderline personality disorder refuse treatment?

What is the first-line treatment for borderline personality disorder?

Where can I get help for borderline personality disorder?

How do you help someone with borderline who doesn't want help?

Sometimes a person with BPD doesn't want to attend their appointment with their psychiatrist or other therapist, even though they have previously committed to their treatment. If this happens: ask them what is worrying them and let them talk about it. keep giving them emotional support and encouragement.

Can a person with borderline personality disorder change?

study suggests that people with BPD can change over time. It would seem that the people in the best position to modulate their symptoms are the ones who had a more positive childhood environment.

How do you motivate someone with borderline personality disorder?

The following 9 strategies can help you support a person with BPD:Learn about BPD. ... Show confidence and respect. ... Be trustworthy. ... Manage conflict with attachment. ... Encourage Professional Help. ... Identify strengths. ... Have fun together. ... Take suicide seriously.More items...•

What happens if you don't treat borderline personality disorder?

If left untreated, the person suffering from BPD may find themselves involved with extravagant spending, substance abuse, binge eating, reckless driving, and indiscriminate sex, Hooper says. The reckless behavior is usually linked to the poor self-image many BPD patients struggle with.

Do borderlines change their mind a lot?

Constant changes of mind. People with BPD might find that they constantly change their mind about things, whether it's their feelings towards the people around them, or other areas of their life, such as their goals, ambitions or sexuality.

Are borderlines aware of their behavior?

People with borderline personality disorders are aware of their behaviors and the consequences of them and often act in increasingly erratic ways as a self-fulfilling prophecy to their abandonment fears.

How do you make someone with BPD feel better?

Learn their triggers. Talk to your loved one and try to find out what sort of situations or conversations might trigger negative thoughts and emotions.Learn more about BPD, and help to challenge stigma. ... Help them seek treatment and support. ... Help them find an advocate. ... Take care of yourself.

How do you calm down someone with borderline personality disorder?

Listening to your loved one and acknowledging their feelings is one of the best ways to help someone with BPD calm down. When you appreciate how a borderline person hears you and adjust how you communicate with them, you can help diffuse the attacks and rages and build a stronger, closer relationship.

How do borderlines destroy lives?

BPD splitting destroys relationships by causing the person to distort how they see themselves and others. BPD relationships shift between highs and lows. BPD splitting destroy relationships in the way that the person defends against bad feelings within themselves so that they can feel good about themselves.

Does BPD get worse with age?

Borderline personality disorder usually begins by early adulthood. The condition seems to be worse in young adulthood and may gradually get better with age.

Are borderlines psychopaths?

BPD features are highly represented in subjects with psychopathy as well as psychopathic traits are highly prevalent in patients with BPD.

Can you self treat borderline personality disorder?

Only a medical professional can diagnose you with BPD. Typically, the first line of treatment for this condition is psychotherapy, though your doctor may also recommend medication—and both of these options are very helpful for reducing symptoms of BPD.

What You Need to Know About BPD

People with borderline personality disorder (BPD) tend to have major difficulties with relationships, especially with those closest to them. The wi...

Recognizing The Signs and Symptoms of BPD

Recognizing the signs and symptoms of borderline personality disorder is not always easy. BPD is rarely diagnosed on its own, but often in conjunct...

to Help Someone With Bpd, First Take Care of Yourself

When a family member or partner has borderline personality disorder, it’s all too easy to get caught up in heroic efforts to please and appease him...

Communicating With Someone Who Has BPD

Communication is a key part of any relationship but communicating with a borderline person can be especially challenging. People in a close relatio...

Setting Healthy Boundaries With A Borderline Loved One

One of the most effective ways to help a loved one with BPD gain control over his or her behavior is to set and enforce healthy limits or boundarie...

Supporting Your Loved One's BPD Treatment

Borderline personality disorder is highly treatable, yet it’s common for people with BPD to avoid treatment or deny that they have a problem. Even...

What is borderline personality disorder?

People with borderline personality disorder (BPD) tend to have major difficulties with relationships, especially with those closest to them. Their wild mood swings, angry outbursts, chronic abandonment fears, and impulsive and irrational behaviors can leave loved ones feeling helpless, abused, and off balance.

How to help someone with BPD?

To help someone with BPD, first take care of yourself. When a family member or partner has borderline personality disorder, it’s all too easy to get caught up in heroic efforts to please and appease him or her.

What does BPD mean in a relationship?

People in a close relationship with a borderline adult often liken talking with their loved one to arguing with a small child. People with BPD have trouble reading body language or understanding the nonverbal content of a conversation. They may say things that are cruel, unfair, or irrational.

What is the problem with BPD?

The problem for people with BPD is that the disorder distorts both the messages they hear and those they try to express. BPD expert and author, Randi Kreger, likens it to “having ‘aural dyslexia,’ in which they hear words and sentences backwards, inside out, sideways, and devoid of context.”.

What happens when someone has BPD?

This emotional volatility can cause turmoil in their relationships and stress for family members, partners, and friends. Many people in a close relationship with someone who suffers from BPD often know that there’s something wrong with their loved one, but have no idea what it is or if there is even a name for it.

Is it easy to recognize BPD?

Recognizing the signs and symptoms of BPD. Recognizing the signs and symptoms of borderline personality disorder is not always easy. BPD is rarely diagnosed on its own, but often in conjunction with co-occurring disorders such as depression, bipolar disorder, anxiety, an eating disorder, or substance abuse. Your family member or loved one ...

Can you help someone else?

You can’t help someone else or enjoy sustainable, satisfying relationships when you’re run down and overwhelmed by stress. As in the event of an in-flight emergency, you must “put on your own oxygen mask first.”. Avoid the temptation to isolate.

What happens if you don't get treatment for borderline personality disorder?

NIMH-funded studies indicate that borderline personality disorder patients who don’t receive adequate treatment are more likely to develop other chronic medical or mental illnesses and are less likely to make healthy lifestyle choices.

What are the risk factors for borderline personality disorder?

But is it not clear whether these changes were risk factors for the disorder, or caused by the disorder. Environmental, Cultural, and Social Factors. Many people with borderline personality disorder report experiencing traumatic life events, such as abuse, abandonment, or adversity during childhood.

What is a clinical trial?

Clinical trials are research studies that look at new ways to prevent, detect, or treat diseases and conditions, including borderline personality disorder . During clinical trials, treatments might be new drugs, new types of psychotherapy, new combinations of drugs, or new ways to use existing treatments.

How long does a borderline personality disorder episode last?

Intense and highly changeable moods, with each episode lasting from a few hours to a few days. Feelings of dissociation, such as feeling cut off from oneself, observing oneself from outside one’s body, or feelings of unreality. Not everyone with borderline personality disorder experiences every symptom.

What is DBT therapy?

DBT, which was developed for individuals with borderline personality disorder, uses concepts of mindfulness and acceptance or being aware of and attentive to the current situation and emotional state. DBT also teaches skills to control intense emotions, reduce self-destructive behaviors, and improve relationships.

What does it mean when you feel dissociated?

Feelings of dissociation, such as feeling cut off from oneself, observing oneself from outside one’s body, or feelings of unreality. Not everyone with borderline personality disorder experiences every symptom. Some individuals experience only a few symptoms, while others have many.

Can borderline personality disorder change?

As a result, their interests and values can change quickly. People with borderline personality disorder also tend to view things in extremes, such as all good or all bad. Their opinions of other people can also change quickly. An individual who is seen as a friend one day may be considered an enemy or traitor the next.

Why do people with borderline personality disorder react so negatively?

This reaction is due to the fact that some people with borderline personality disorder may be unable to process negative emotions without acting out in anger.

Who should diagnose borderline personality disorder?

Only a mental health professional, such as a psychologist, clinical social worker, or psychiatrist, should make a diagnosis of borderline personality disorder. Because personality is believed to continue forming through adolescence, diagnosing children with borderline personality disorder is still an issue of debate among mental health ...

What is the fear of abandonment?

Intense fear of abandonment: Fear of abandonment is commonly experienced by people with borderline personality disorder experience. This fearcan be so severe that a person may engage in extreme measures, such as faking illness or threatening self-harm, to avoid perceived separation or rejection from others.

Why is borderline personality disorder misunderstood?

Because borderline personality disorder is often misunderstood and stigmatized, diagnosis has the potential to negatively impact the lives of diagnosed individuals as well as their friends and loved ones.Being educated about BPD and being able to separate fact from fiction can help combat the potentially negative stigma that is often associated with the disorder.

What is it called when you lose objective reality?

This loss of objective reality is known as “splitting.”.

How many people are living with BPD?

Remember that an estimated 1.6 percent of adults in the United States are living with borderline personality disorder—several million people. If you or a loved one is experiencing symptoms of BPD, you are not alone, and you have options for help.

What is the best treatment for a symtom?

A combination of therapeutic approaches may help you to manage your symptoms in the long term, and one of the most highly recommended approaches is psychotherapy , also sometimes called talk therapy.

What is the fear of abandonment?

People with borderline personality disorder (BPD) often have a strong fear of abandonment, struggle to maintain healthy relationships, have very intense emotions, act impulsively, and may even experience paranoia and dissociation. It can be a scary illness to live with, which is why it’s so important that people with BPD are surrounded by people ...

Why is BPD so scary?

But it’s also an incredibly stigmatized illness. Due to an abundant of misconceptions around it, many people with the disorder feel scared to speak out about living with it. ...

What is borderline personality disorder?

Borderline personality disorder — sometimes known as emotionally unstable personality disorder — is a personality disorder which affects how you think and feel about yourself and others. People with borderline personality disorder (BPD) often have a strong fear of abandonment, struggle to maintain healthy relationships, ...

Why do people with BPD come across as clingy?

Someone with BPD would do anything to stop that from happening, which is why they may come across as being “clingy” or “needy.”. Though it can be difficult to empathize with, remember that it stems from a place of fear, which can be incredibly hard to live with. 2.

How long does BPD last?

This person says it exactly right — people with BPD have very intense emotions that can last from a few hours to even a few days, and can change very quickly.

What does it mean when you have BPD?

Even if we seem “overly-sensitive,” remember that it’s not always within our control. 3. ‘Everything is felt more intensely: good, bad, or otherwise.

Can a person with BPD have that assumed about them?

Chances are, if you read something about borderline personality disorder that you wouldn’t want said about you, a person with BPD won’t benefit from having that assumed about them, either.

Informed BPD Treatment

This knowledge of why you are seeking change can inform the BPD treatment process. Discovering and working with information like this is part of the commitment the BPD therapist must make in the long-term treatment of not only those dealing with the symptoms of Borderline Personality Disorder, but with the family of those undergoing treatment.

BPD Blog Round-Up: Finding BPD Support From Others Online

Contact Clearview today for a Confidential Consultation. Call us at (866) 756-8819 now to speak to an admissions counselor about treatment programs.

What is the best way to help people change who don't want to change?

[1] . The approach is called motivational interviewing. The basic idea is this: When you’re trying to influence people who need motivation, but not information, don’t offer more information. That’s nagging.

What is it called when you try to convince someone to change?

When you and I try to convince someone to change, we call it persuasion . When someone tries to get you to do something that you don’t want to do, you call it nagging. Our double-standard in nomenclature aside, whether we giving or receiving it, we know it doesn’t work. I just checked Amazon – there are no published books that showcase nagging as either a leadership skill or an effective influence strategy. So with the vast supply of nagging produced every day in the world, you’d think there would be a massive body of research demonstrating its efficacy. But there isn’t.

What to do when someone doesn't listen to you?

Psychology is always out of touch with reality. If you need someone close to you to change, give them an ultimatum. If they dont listen, drop them. Show them they have something to lose. If they still dont care, then they werent worth your time anyway. Sometimes a person needs to lose everything to clean the slate.

What can you do to help a loved one recover?

There are several things you can do to support your loved one's recovery, and many of them include setting your own boundaries and not enabling your loved one's abusive behavior.

What happens if you don't control your loved one?

This lack of control naturally leaves many loved ones feeling desperate and helpless— but it doesn't have to.

What to do if your spouse has BPD?

Whether it’s your spouse, child, parent, sibling, or friend who is exhibiting symptoms of BPD, there are steps you can take to set boundaries in your relationship and improve your own quality of life , even if the person with BPD isn’t ready to acknowledge the problem. All the while, you can continue to encourage your loved one to seek professional ...

How to contact the BPD?

If you or a loved one are struggling with BPD, contact the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) National Helpline at 1-800-662-4357 for information on support and treatment facilities in your area. For more mental health resources, see our National Helpline Database.

What to do if you don't live together?

If your loved one continues to cross boundaries or make you feel unsafe, you may need to find an alternate living arrangement or, if you don't live together, simply keep your distance from this person. Allowing their abuse to continue does much more harm than good—and not only for you but also for them.

How to protect yourself from being verbally abusive?

Here are some tips for both helping your loved one and protecting yourself: Make clear the kinds of behavior you will not tolerate, focusing on yourself. You might say, "If you can't speak calmly/stop being verbally abusive right now, I'm going to remove myself from the conversation.". Bring the entire family into the discussion about setting ...

Why do people refuse to get help?

There are so many reasons that people refuse to get help. Many are afraid of the stigma attached to mental health issues. Others feel they cannot commit the time and/or financial resources required to engage in therapy.

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