Treatment FAQ

why do people give you the silent treatment

by Lilla O'Connell Published 2 years ago Updated 2 years ago
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We list these 8 benefits of the silent treatment to help you understand the same:

  1. You can understand your partner better People who use the silent treatment as a method of punishing their partner can...
  2. Treat silence with silence A narcissist uses silent treatment to abuse their victim. This is one of his most...
  3. Does the silent treatment work in long-distance...

Sometimes, a person may give someone the silent treatment because they are too angry, hurt, or overwhelmed to speak. They may be afraid of saying something that makes the situation worse. In these cases, it can be helpful for each person to take some time to cool off before getting together to discuss the issue calmly.Jun 8, 2020

Full Answer

How to respond when someone gives you the silent treatment?

Jun 08, 2020 · Sometimes, a person may give someone the silent treatment because they are too angry, hurt, or overwhelmed to speak. They may be afraid of saying something that makes the situation worse. In these...

What is the purpose of giving someone the "silent treatment"?

Apr 05, 2021 · A person might give silent treatment to inflict emotional pain. It can be in an effort to make you feel bad about the things you may or may not be guilty of. And in fact, it is a way to inflict pain on oneself as well. People often try to control themselves from talking to people they are conditioned no to talk to.

Does the silent treatment really work?

Oct 09, 2014 · The silent treatment is a way to inflict pain without visible bruising – literally. Research has shown that the act of ignoring or excluding activates the same area of the brain that is activated by physical pain. The best predictor of divorce isn’t whether a couple fights – arguments are inevitable – but how a couple fights.

Why is my Friend giving me the silent treatment?

Mar 26, 2021 · The silent treatment is a particularly insidious form of abuse because it might force the victim to reconcile with the perpetrator in an effort to end the behavior, even if the victim doesn’t know...

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What kind of person uses the silent treatment?

Research. Researchers have found that the silent treatment is used by both men and women to terminate a partner's behaviors or words rather than to elicit them. 1 In abusive relationships, the silent treatment is used to manipulate the other person and to establish power over them.Jun 1, 2020

Why would someone give me the silent treatment?

Sometimes, going silent may be the best thing to avoid saying things you would later regret. People might also use it in moments where they don't know how to express themselves or feel overwhelmed. But some people use the silent treatment as a tool for exerting power over someone or creating emotional distance.Apr 30, 2019

What does the silent treatment say about you?

“Exclusion and rejection literally hurt,” John Bargh, a psychology professor at Yale, told me. But the silent treatment ultimately harms the person causing it, too. Humans are predisposed to reciprocate social cues, so ignoring someone goes against our nature, Williams said.Mar 26, 2021

Does silent treatment mean break up?

The silent treatment is a particularly toxic form of behavior that can lead to the breakdown of relationships. When a partner gives you the silent treatment, you might feel a crazy need to make him talk.

Is giving the silent treatment immature?

At best the silent treatment isan immature behavior used by spoiled brats and manipulativeindividuals. At worst, it is a weapon used by abusers to punish their victims.Jul 11, 2016

Is silent treatment toxic?

Findings from his in-depth analysis revealed that the silent treatment is 'tremendously' damaging to a relationship. It decreases relationship satisfaction for both partners, diminishes feelings of intimacy, and reduces the capacity to communicate in a way that's healthy and meaningful.

How do you win the silent treatment?

Maintain your dignity and try these six strategies.Look for the reasons behind the silent treatment. ... Share the psychology behind silent treatment. ... Avoid reacting to silent abuse. ... Respond with calmness and speak kindly. ... State your boundaries clearly. ... Take care of yourself. ... Consider professional therapy.Apr 26, 2021

Why is silence so powerful?

Being silent allows us to channel our energies. It gives us the clarity we need to calmly face challenges and uncertainty. The hour of silence I practice each morning, and encourage you to practice as well, can be a time for collecting our thoughts, training our minds, and deciding how we want to enter into the day.Jul 22, 2021

What does it mean when someone gives you the silent treatment?

The silent treatment is a sign that communication in the relationship has broken down.

What is silent treatment?

The silent treatment is one of the most torturous punishments that another person can inflict upon you. They use silence as their weapon of choice. By withholding their approval, they expect you to work out what is wrong and resolve the situation before they will resume talking to you.

What does it mean when someone doesn't talk to you?

It is essentially an attack on the very essence of who you are. When someone chooses not to talk to you and withholds their approval , they are telling you that you are not good enough as you are.

What is the curse of the modern world?

Another curse of the modern world is that people are desperate for attention all the time. They get to see how vacuous celebrities profit from attention (good or bad) and so, if they feel that you are not giving them enough attention; they will force you to give them attention by acting in a manner which leaves you wondering what’s wrong and what you need to do to resolve the situation. Be wary if somebody is giving you the silent treatment for this reason because if they think it works, they will keep doing it.

Why do people use the silent treatment?

People use the silent treatment for a number of reasons. These include: 1 Avoidance: In some cases, people stay silent in a conversation because they do not know what to say or want to avoid conflict. 2 Communication: A person may use the silent treatment if they do not know how to express their feelings but want their partner to know that they are upset. 3 Punishment: If a person uses silence to punish someone or to exert control or power over them, this is a form of emotional abuse.

What is silent treatment?

Summary. The silent treatment is a refusal to communicate verbally with another person. People who use the silent treatment may even refuse to acknowledge the presence of the other person. People use the silent treatment in many types of relationship, including romantic relationships. It can sometimes be a form of emotional abuse.

Why do people use silence?

they talk to other people but not to their partner. they seek alliances from others. they use silence to blame their partner and make them feel guilty. they use silence to manipulate or “improve” their partner, or to pressure them to change their behavior.

How to deal with a person who is abusive?

Avoid becoming defensive or going into problem-solving mode. Try to stay present and listen empathically. If the person responds in a threatening or abusive way, it is important to remove oneself from the situation until they calm down. Talk to a doctor, therapist, or trusted friend for help.

What are the types of emotional abuse?

demanding access to their phone, email account, and other digital information. deciding what they wear, eat, or drink.

How to help someone with domestic violence?

talk privately with a trusted professional, such as a counselor or domestic violence advocate, who can discuss the person’s options in a safe space. seek advice and support from a domestic abuse organization, such as the National Domestic Violence Hotline or Love is Respect.

What is the meaning of "controlling"?

controlling all their finances and spending. controlling whether or not they go to work or school. humiliating them in front of others or on social media. using intimidating behavior, threatening them, or giving them ultimatums. threatening to harm themselves, pets, or loved ones. gaslighting them.

What is silent treatment?

The silent treatment is a way to inflict pain without visible bruising – literally. Research has shown that the act of ignoring or excluding activates the same area of the brain that is activated by physical pain.

Why is it so hard to break a pattern?

It’s an incredibly hard pattern to break because both partners lay the blame at the feet of the other. ‘Partners get locked in this pattern, largely because they each see the other as the cause,’ explains Schrodt. ‘Both partners see the other as the problem.’.

Why do people use silent treatment?

The silent treatment might be employed by passive personality types to avoid conflict and confrontation, while strong personality types use it to punish or control. Some people may not even consciously choose it at all.

Why is silent treatment so insidious?

The silent treatment is a particularly insidious form of abuse because it might force the victim to reconcile with the perpetrator in an effort to end the behavior, even if the victim doesn’t know why they’re apologizing. “It’s especially controlling because it deprives both sides from weighing in,” Williams said.

How long does silent treatment last?

In the end, whether it lasts four hours or four decades, the silent treatment says more about the person doing it than it does about the person receiving it.

What is silent treatment?

The silent treatment is a form of emotional abuse typically employed by people with narcissistic tendencies. It is designed to (1) place the abuser in a position of control; (2) silence the target’s attempts at assertion; (3) avoid conflict resolution/personal responsibility/compromise; or (4) punish the target for a perceived ego slight.

How long does silent treatment last?

Silent treatment is a form o f abuse. Being married to my husband for 8 years now and every 4 or 6 months he engages in one. That will last for almost 2 months. Yes I said 2 months.

How to get rid of silent abuse?

Mystery. That could be the answer to your questions. I’m not sure the abuser has a good reason to use the silent treatment. Get to know yourself. Have a healthy self esteem. Continue to have love and compassion. Don’t let people change you.

What to say when someone is not with you?

No can be trusted with out a reason. Words are weapons use them wisely. Think three times before you speak. Say something in your head. Then speak it. Always make it sound good. ‘ My father died’ or ” my dad passed away.” Body functions are always a bad topic . And remember your time is important don’t waste it on deaf ears.

How to love a boy who loves himself?

Every woman deserves to be pursued. It is not for you to fix him. Instead pray for him. Your boy loves himself so much and is blatantly inconsiderate of you. He’s probably moved on, but keeping the door to you open just in case he fails at his other prospects. It’s time for you to love you. Let go and let God. You seem like a loving woman, ive been where you are. Moving on is hard but the wounds heal and your vision gets clearer. Trust me, it gets better.

What is the worst thing about narcissists?

Worst thing about Narcissists is their incredible double standards and hypocrisy yet we keep on giving them the benefit of the doubt because our feelings are begging for forgiveness when all the time they are just taking advantage of our better nature.

What to say to a breakup friend?

Carrie,#N#I deeply appreciate your kind, encouraging words. Every bit of kindness helps exponentially, so thank you a million times. You are right, of course. I know it gets better. I’ve had breakups in the past, but they were mutual good-byes, see you laters, take good cares, I wish you the best, etc…..there was communication!

Why do people use silent treatment?

This helps to diffuse the aggression that one person is feeling. 2. You can understand your partner better. People who use the silent treatment as a method of punishing their partner can stay silent for days building a wall around them and behaving that their partner doesn’t exist. This is terrible for a relationship.

Why is silence important in marriage?

Silent treatment could be beneficial and abusive too. Silent treatment in marriage is thought to be a way of punishing a partner and is akin to passive aggressive behavior. But it is not always as mean as it is made out to be.

Is dissociating a bad thing?

Dissociating is not always a bad thing as long as you have the right boundaries and reasons for it. The silent treatment can work wonders in relationships but interestingly it can resolve tensions with exes too. Why the silent treatment works with an ex is something you might be wondering.

Is silent treatment effective?

While prolonged silent treatment could lead to emotional abuse and is said to be as lethal as physical abuse having long-term psychological effects, it is often regarded as an effective tool for conflict resolution.

Why do people use the silent treatment?

People who use the silent treatment to win arguments and gain control need to understand the magnitude of their immature behavior. Confrontation lets them know that you see what they are doing and you understand the tactics they use. After telling them the truth, you can laugh about it.

How to win silent treatment?

1. Shrugging it off. One way to understand how to win the silent treatment is to brush it off or ignore it. If you aren’t necessarily in a close relationship with the person who is giving you the silent treatment, you may be able to just move on and act like nothing happened.

What to do if you are silent?

If you are experiencing the silent treatment from someone you love, then therapy may be the only answer. This only works if your partner is willing to go to therapy in order to move forward. Unfortunately, so many people like using the silent treatment and don’t want a therapist taking that weapon away.

What is a narcissist?

The narcissist. The narcissist is a troubled and sad individual. Among their weapons of choice, like their other manipulation techniques, they also utilize the silent treatment. The narcissist, since they are void of all original inner substance, will use the silent treatment to further establish who they are.

What does it mean when someone ignores others?

People who haven’t been taught to care effectively for others in a household will use the silent treatment on a regular basis. Selfish people care for themselves over others and when something doesn’t go their way, they ignore others to make a statement.

Who is Sherrie Hurd?

Sherrie Hurd is a professional writer and artist with over 20 years of experience. As a survivor of childhood trauma and multiple types of abuse, she is an advocate for mental health awareness. Sherrie manages multiple mental illnesses, including anxiety disorder, bipolar disorder, and PTSD. With this background and personal experience, she strives to help others overcome trauma and abuse, cope with mental illness, and heal over time.

How do you deal with the silent treatment of a narcissist?

Not only is it emotionally exhausting, but it makes you feel like you’re completely worthless, and it can make you feel like you’re losing your mind! So what are you supposed to do when you’re the victim of the silent treatment?

Why Do Narcissists Give You the Silent Treatment?

It’s critical to recognize that while many people have times when they need to retreat to think about things, someone who cares about you will never use this abusive tactic to punish you. The silent treatment isn’t a tactic that a healthy person would use to manipulate you.

The Psychology of the Silent Treatment

In general, silent treatment can be intentional or accidental. However, sometimes it is used as a form of social control. At other times, it may indicate that the person has no respect for your value as a person and regards you as less than human. Regardless of its intent, using silent treatment toward others can have devastating consequences.

When the Silent Treatment Ends: Beware the Hoover

One last tip: when the narcissist decides the silent treatment is over, and they need your narcissistic supply again, they will do anything in their power to “suck you back in,” a move we call “the hoover maneuver .” Don’t fall for it – it’s not going to get better, and they’re not really planning to change.

Start Getting Help with Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Today

Online help is readily available for survivors of narcissistic abuse. Here are some options to begin healing from narcissistic abuse right away.

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