Treatment FAQ

when you are getting the silent treatment

by Jamie Braun Published 3 years ago Updated 2 years ago
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Key things to do when responding to the silent treatment and why:

  • 01 Give the angry party some space. Before you do anything, you should give the angry party some space and time alone so...
  • 02 Rethink the situation from the other person’s point of view. In the same vein of being cautious, you’ll need to think...
  • 03 Seek the opinion of a trusted third party. If you feel...

The silent treatment is a refusal to communicate verbally with another person. People who use the silent treatment may even refuse to acknowledge the presence of the other person. People use the silent treatment in many types of relationship, including romantic relationships.Jun 8, 2020

Full Answer

How to respond when someone gives you the silent treatment?

Jun 08, 2020 · The silent treatment is a refusal to communicate verbally with another person. People who use the silent treatment may even refuse to acknowledge the presence of the other person. People use the...

What happens when you give a narcissist the silent treatment?

Jun 05, 2018 · The silent treatment can work if you’ve stopped dating someone who keeps bothering you. However, I hope you’ll first have told that person kindly but firmly you don’t see a future in the relationship and have decided to break up. The only other time the silent treatment might be needed is if you’re dealing with an abusive ex.

Why are you receiving the silent treatment?

Jul 11, 2016 · The only person who really feels the silent treatment is the target. The person giving the silent treatment is not being overtly aggressive, abusive, or …

Why do narcissists use the silent treatment?

The silent treatment happens when one partner pressures the other with requests, criticism or complaints and the other responds with silence and emotional distance. Paul Schrodt, PhD, Professor of Communication Studies reviewed 74 relationship studies which involved more than 14,000 participants.

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What is silent treatment?

Summary. The silent treatment is a refusal to communicate verbally with another person. People who use the silent treatment may even refuse to acknowledge the presence of the other person. People use the silent treatment in many types of relationship, including romantic relationships. It can sometimes be a form of emotional abuse.

Why is silent treatment important?

for healthy relationships. Using the silent treatment prevents people from resolving their conflicts in a helpful way. When one partner wants to talk about a problem but the other withdraws, it can cause negative emotions such as anger and distress.

How does silent treatment affect relationships?

How it affects relationships. In most cases, using the silent treatment is not a productive way to deal with a disagreement. Research indicates that both men and women use the silent treatment in relationships. However, clear and direct communication is essential. for healthy relationships.

Why do people stay silent in a conversation?

These include: Avoidance: In some cases, people stay silent in a conversation because they do not know what to say or want to avoid conflict. Communication: A person may use the silent treatment if they do not know how to express their feelings but want their partner to know that they are upset.

How does silence end?

the silence lasts for extended periods of time. the silence only ends when they decide it does. they talk to other people but not to their partner. they seek alliances from others. they use silence to blame their partner and make them feel guilty.

What to do when someone threatens you?

If the person responds in a threatening or abusive way, it is important to remove oneself from the situation until they calm down. Talk to a doctor, therapist, or trusted friend for help.

How do I let someone know how I feel?

A person can let the other person know how they feel by using “I” statements. For example, the person on the receiving end may say: “I’m feeling hurt and frustrated that you aren’t speaking to me. I would like to find a way to resolve this.”

What does it mean when you use the silent treatment?

When you’re using the silent treatment, you’re attempting to manipulate and control your partner or spouse.

How to get rid of the silent treatment?

2. Take a break. Familiarise yourself with a time-out (opens in a new tab). It’s a really useful strategy when you’re feeling too overwhelmed to think straight.

What to do if you're in a long distance relationship?

If you’re dating or are in a long-distance relationship and you’re being given the silent treatment, stop writing, texting or calling right away! You’re either being manipulated, or the relationship has ended.

What does it mean when your partner stops talking to you?

If your partner seems to have stopped talking to you out of the blue or after a fight, clearly the two of you are having a conflict – even if you weren’t aware that you’d done something ‘wrong’.

Do you need to worry about silent treatment?

If you’re using a more helpful way of communicating and argue fairly, you won’t need to worry about the silent treatment backfiring.

Is silent treatment hurtful?

Being treated with the silent treatment is hurtful. You deserve better. So here are three steps you can undertake to encourage your partner to communicate in a more helpful way…

Can you change your partner's therapy?

you are not your partner’s therapist. you cannot change your partner, and neither should you change yourself to fit in with their demands beyond reasonable compromises. ‘giving back’ the silent treatment will result in a competition detrimental to the survival of your relationship.

What is silent treatment?

The silent treatment is emotional abuse. When a victim is in a relationship with a person who causes the above mentioned distress, her mind and body remember how upsettingand anxiety provoking theprevioussilent treatment occurrences were.

Why is silent treatment not blatant?

The only person who really feels the silent treatment is the target. The person giving the silent treatment is not being overtly aggressive, abusive, or unkind in any visible way. This keeps himlooking “good” and reasonable.

Who said "Codependent no more"?

Melody Beattie, the Codependent No More author, has a great line for when a codependent doesn’tlike what the addict in herlife is doing. I think the quote is perfect for those dealing with the silent treatment. I recommend that you make it your own; it is: ” Celebrate the ‘no’!

Is silent treatment abusive?

Whether the person in your life is using the silent treatment immaturely or abusively, one thing is for sure, it is infuriating to receive; problems cannot bedealt with, conflicts remain unresolved, simple conversations are thwarted, and in the end, relationships employing this tactic become either toxic on nonexistent.

What does it mean when someone gives you the silent treatment?

The silent treatment is a sign that communication in the relationship has broken down.

How to resolve silent treatment?

To resolve the issue long-term, you need to identify the reason the other person has chosen the silent treatment as their way to deal with problems. When you do that you can work to resolve the real issue because you will no longer be treating the symptom; you will be treating the disease.

How to resolve a silent behavior problem?

To resolve the issue long-term, you need to identify the reason the other person has chosen the silent treatment as their way to deal with problems. When you do that you can work to resolve the real issue because you will no longer be treating the symptom; you will be treating the disease. Overcome Passive Aggressive Behaviour.

What happens if you silently treat someone?

If the silent treatment is continuous and prolonged, you begin to wonder what is wrong with you. After all the desire to talk to others is natural so, for somebody to not want to talk to you, there must be something seriously wrong with you. When someone is giving you the silent treatment to inflict emotional pain, ...

What does it mean when someone doesn't want to talk to you?

When someone chooses not to talk to you and withholds their approval, they are telling you that you are not good enough as you are. Although you may have done nothing wrong, your natural inclination is to wonder what you did wrong. If the silent treatment is continuous and prolonged, you begin to wonder what is wrong with you. After all the desire to talk to others is natural so, for somebody to not want to talk to you, there must be something seriously wrong with you.

Why do people ignore pharmacists?

they give you a taste of your own medicine. However, as they are unlikely to be a pharmacist, they have no idea how to choose the right medicine. A healthy dose of communication would be far more effective.

Does silent treatment resolve issues?

Whichever is true, the silent treatment is not going to resolve the issue. Only communication can. If you have discussed your issues with the other person openly and honestly and; you feel that they are not taking you seriously, the silent treatment is unlikely to see them change.

Why is silent treatment called the weapon of choice?

Generally, it’s called on as the weapon of choice because it’s powerful and it’s easy to get away with.

Does silent treatment damage a relationship?

Nobody engage s the silent treatment expecting it to damage the relationship, and that’s the danger.

Is mental health real?

6. Mental health is real here, depression and other thoughts are real by the the person being silent ( not being social is unhealthy medical fact).

Why do people use the silent treatment?

People who use the silent treatment to win arguments and gain control need to understand the magnitude of their immature behavior. Confrontation lets them know that you see what they are doing and you understand the tactics they use. After telling them the truth, you can laugh about it.

What to do if you are silent?

If you are experiencing the silent treatment from someone you love, then therapy may be the only answer. This only works if your partner is willing to go to therapy in order to move forward. Unfortunately, so many people like using the silent treatment and don’t want a therapist taking that weapon away.

What is selfish treatment?

The selfish. People who haven’t been taught to care effectively for others in a household will use the silent treatment on a regular basis. Selfish people care for themselves over others and when something doesn’t go their way, they ignore others to make a statement.

How to win silent treatment?

1. Shrugging it off. One way to understand how to win the silent treatment is to brush it off or ignore it. If you aren’t necessarily in a close relationship with the person who is giving you the silent treatment, you may be able to just move on and act like nothing happened.

What happens when you are stuck in victim mentality?

So, when they are confronted with something they are doing wrong, they will grow silent and attempt to force their way.

What does it mean when something isn't going their way?

When something isn’t going their way, they know that their silent treatment may be the only real key to turning the tables and getting exactly what they want, after all. Sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn’t. This all depends on the strength and maturity of their intended target. 2. The narcissist.

How to stop silent treatment?

If you want to stop the silent treatment, you need to make it about the person who is angry with you.

When you notice the silent treatment from your partner or friend, should you respond?

When you notice the silent treatment from your partner or friend, you shouldn’t respond with anger directed at the angry person. You shouldn’t scream at the person or express anger to get him/her to talk to you.

Why is it important to be silent when you are angry?

This is an important thing to do because the angry partner may need the silent time to reflect on their feelings and reconsider talking to you. Other times, space is what the angry person really wants.

Why do people silently treat their anger?

The silent treatment is almost always because the angry person feels overwhelmed by their emotions. You should go out, or you can stay away for a while.

How to get your angry friend talking?

Get your angry friend talking by suggesting, one by one, the different ways that you could have annoyed him/her. You can say something like:

When deciding how to respond to the silent treatment from a friend or spouse, should you never consider threatening to

When deciding how to respond to the silent treatment from a friend or spouse, you should never consider threatening to leave the relationships as a solution, even out of anger.

Why do people choose to be silent?

Often, people choose to be silent because they feel that they aren’t being heard.

How to respond to silent treatment?

Dig deep into the reasons why, they suggest. Respond to the silent treatment with calmness. Clearly state your boundaries. Talk to the person kindly.

What is silent treatment?

Psychologists consider the narcissistic silent treatment a form of abuse. It’s a popular form of mental torture used by narcissistic individuals, whereby they cut their victims off by not talking to them for extended periods of time.

Why do narcissists use silent treatment?

Narcissists use the silent treatment as a tool for exerting power over someone or creating emotional distance.

Why do narcissists pull the same disappearing act?

If the narcissist pulls the same disappearing act every time you want to have basic, adult communication, it’s not due to wounding, it’s due to their being highly manipulative and abusive.

What is the need to belong and feel accepted?

According to Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs, the need to belong and feel accepted falls under the basic needs of food, water, and safety. In fact, this need can be so strong, it can override the needs of food and safety. Psychologists consider the narcissistic silent treatment a form of abuse.

What happens if you don't block a narcissist?

They see it as an invitation to send you random crippling abuse via SMS, to send out the occasional “dipping” message (to see if they can hook you), and to continue to keep you participating in their mind games…and this is exactly what happens when people don’t block the narcissist.

What is a narcissist's technique called?

What narcissists typically engage in is an insidious psychological technique called “gaslighting.”

What is the silent treatment?

The silent treatment is the no1 weapon used by narcissists during which the narcissist acts as if you are non-existent and even refuses to communicate, even if you tried doing so. So, what happens when this silent-treatment is reversed?

What happens if you continue the silent treatment?

If you still continue the silent treatment, the narcissist may finally abandon you and move on with new narcissistic supply and new victims.

What happens when you give silent treatment to a narcissist?

What happens in the initial days. When you start to give the silent treatment to the narcissist, the narcissist immediately finds it offending and hurting. As narcissists can’t tolerate being ignored, the act of silent treatment strikes the narcissist much harder than the normal people. As you start with the silent treatment, ...

How long does it take for a narcissist to come back to you?

Unable to feel being ignored, his inflated ego starts hitting him harder and harder. So, after giving silent treatment for a few weeks , the narcissist will likely come back to you. He may start chasing you so that he can get back his narcissistic supply like before.

Why does a narcissist block you?

The Narcissist may even block you on all his social media accounts and try to act extra friendlier with others, so that he can get more eyeballs from you. His routine bragging and show-off start to begin, just to show you that he is the most valuable person and prove that you are missing a great treasure ignoring him.

What if you started hanging out with someone else?

So, what if you started hanging out with some other person? What if you looked and seemed happy in the eyes of your narcissist? That’s it, your narcissist gets intensely jealous. Yes, the narcissist’s jealously will be clearly visible and is manifested in his different actions. It can vary from demeaning your character to even the narcissist himself trying to trigger your jealousy too.

Why do we call it the attention grabbing phase?

Firstly, why we call it the attention-grabbing phase? This is because the narcissist starts to do everything, just to grab your attention and make you come back to him.

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