Treatment FAQ

when two girlfriends one gives silent treatment

by Malcolm Marquardt DVM Published 2 years ago Updated 2 years ago
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During a time of silence, both partners should pause to reflect on what led up to the silent treatment episode, especially if it was preceded by an argument, fight, or emotional outburst. If you're on the receiving end, you may feel frustrated and angry, so take a cooling-off period to get a breath and calm down. 2.

6 Ways to Respond to the Silent Treatment
  • Take some time to cool off.
  • Give your partner space to think.
  • Don't apologize unless you're truly sorry.
  • Apologize if you're truly sorry.
  • Ask yourself whether it's just a personality difference.
  • Set rules for healthy communication.
Feb 5, 2022

Full Answer

When to give the silent treatment in a relationship?

Hurt often turns into anger, and clamming up is a result of that. They just may not be ready to talk yet. Give them some time, but no longer than a day or two. If after you have done all this, and the silent treatment carries on for days or weeks at a time, it’s a good bet that you need to seriously evaluate your relationship.

What kind of person gives the silent treatment to his daughter?

Immature, serial liar, gives you the silent treatment and puts down your daughter. He is also a manipulator and emotional abuser. He is trying to isolate you from your daughter, so that he has more control over you.

Is it bad to give your ex The Silent Treatment?

Answer: Whether you realize it or not, you are trying to punish your ex by giving him the silent treatment. On the face of it, he is in the wrong as he refuses to discuss matters with you. However, some individuals genuinely do not like conflict and will avoid it at all costs.

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When both partners give the silent treatment?

Research. Researchers have found that the silent treatment is used by both men and women to terminate a partner's behaviors or words rather than to elicit them. 1 In abusive relationships, the silent treatment is used to manipulate the other person and to establish power over them.

What do you do when your girlfriend gives you the silent treatment?

Calmly tell the person that you've noticed they're not responding and you want to understand why. Emphasize that you want to resolve things. While it's not your fault that someone else decides to give you the silent treatment, you do have a responsibility to apologize if you've done something wrong.

Does silent treatment mean break up?

The silent treatment is a particularly toxic form of behavior that can lead to the breakdown of relationships. When a partner gives you the silent treatment, you might feel a crazy need to make him talk.

Can the silent treatment end a relationship?

Findings from his in-depth analysis revealed that the silent treatment is 'tremendously' damaging to a relationship. It decreases relationship satisfaction for both partners, diminishes feelings of intimacy, and reduces the capacity to communicate in a way that's healthy and meaningful.

What does silence do to a man?

Findings from his in-depth analysis revealed that the silent treatment is 'tremendously' damaging to a relationship. It decreases relationship satisfaction for both partners, diminishes feelings of intimacy, and reduces the capacity to communicate in a way that's healthy and meaningful.

How long should silent treatment last?

If the perpetrator still refuses to acknowledge the victim's existence for long periods of time, it might be right to leave the relationship. In the end, whether it lasts four hours or four decades, the silent treatment says more about the person doing it than it does about the person receiving it.

How do you end a relationship in silence?

Establish the right moment to break the silence. Talk softly, enquire the reason for your cut in communication. Walk this process with empathy, embrace each other's differences — apologize if necessary and move on with clear minds. It'll be amazing if you change your perception of the world and love.

Is the silent treatment immature?

At best the silent treatment isan immature behavior used by spoiled brats and manipulativeindividuals. At worst, it is a weapon used by abusers to punish their victims. One demographic of the population that particularly loves the silent treatment is the narcissist.

Is silence a breakup?

Instead of torturing yourself after a breakup, the most important thing you can do is be silent — and we're talking radio silence! You've probably heard the term ghosting, which refers to someone abruptly cutting off all contact with someone they are dating. This is the mindset you need to channel!

Why silence is powerful in a relationship?

Healthy silence can show a level of vulnerability and comfort within a relationship. At other times, one or both individuals may need a break from verbal communication, just being content in each other's space. Healthy silence can also be utilized when a person is angry and escalating.

Is silent treatment toxic?

It's OK if you just need some time to “cool off”. But intentional and prolonged silent treatment is a form of social ostracism that can cause severe emotional and even physical harm. It's a form of punishment and is usually employed by toxic or narcissistic individuals.

How does silent treatment affect relationships?

How it affects relationships. In most cases, using the silent treatment is not a productive way to deal with a disagreement. Research indicates that both men and women use the silent treatment in relationships. However, clear and direct communication is essential. for healthy relationships.

What does it mean to acknowledge someone is using the silent treatment?

Acknowledge that someone is using the silent treatment. For example, a person can say, “I notice that you are not responding to me.” This lays the foundation for two people to engage with each other more effectively.

Why is silent treatment important?

for healthy relationships. Using the silent treatment prevents people from resolving their conflicts in a helpful way. When one partner wants to talk about a problem but the other withdraws, it can cause negative emotions such as anger and distress.

What is silent treatment?

Summary. The silent treatment is a refusal to communicate verbally with another person. People who use the silent treatment may even refuse to acknowledge the presence of the other person. People use the silent treatment in many types of relationship, including romantic relationships. It can sometimes be a form of emotional abuse.

Why do people stay silent in a conversation?

These include: Avoidance: In some cases, people stay silent in a conversation because they do not know what to say or want to avoid conflict. Communication: A person may use the silent treatment if they do not know how to express their feelings but want their partner to know that they are upset.

How does silence end?

the silence lasts for extended periods of time. the silence only ends when they decide it does. they talk to other people but not to their partner. they seek alliances from others. they use silence to blame their partner and make them feel guilty.

What to do if someone feels they are in danger?

If a person feels that they or their family are in immediate danger, they must call 911. If they are not in immediate danger, a person who believes that their partner is abusive should consider whether or not they wish to stay in the relationship. It will help someone in an abusive relationship to:

What does silent treatment do to a relationship?

When the person using the silent treatment takes away the ability to communicate and collaborate with one another, the person on the receiving end often will go to great lengths to restore the verbal aspect of the relationship.

What is silent treatment?

Silent treatment is a flat-out refusal to ever discuss the issue —now or later. In other words, their silence deflects the conversation and communicates that the issue is off-limits. When this happens, the person on the receiving end of the silent treatment must continue to wrestle with their pain and disappointment alone.

Why is a victim silent?

There are also instances when a victim of abuse is silent as a way to stay safe and keep an already abusive situation from escalating. In these situations, the victim knows that saying something—even if their partner demands it—will only escalate the situation and lead to more abuse.

Why do people use silent treatment?

Research. Researchers have found that the silent treatment is used by both men and women to terminate a partner's behaviors or words rather than to elicit them. 1  In abusive relationships, the silent treatment is used to manipulate the other person and to establish power over them.

What to do if your partner is silent?

If your partner is unwilling to change, you may want to consider your options including breaking off the relationship at some point.

How to avoid taking responsibility for bad behavior?

Use the silent treatment to put you in your place. Give you the cold shoulder for days or weeks at a time. Refuse to talk, make eye contact, answer calls, or respond to texts. Fall back on the silent treatment when things don't go their way. Use it as a way to avoid taking responsibility for bad behavior.

How to use silence?

Use silence as a passive-aggressive way to control your behavior (e.g., you give in to demands or you avoid certain behaviors to avoid the silent treatment) Silence you when you attempt to assert yourself by refusing to talk. Use it as the primary means of dealing with conflict.

How to respond to silent treatment?

Here are some ways to respond to the silent treatment. 1. Take Time to Cool Off. During a time of silence both partners should pause to reflect on what led up to the silent treatment episode, especially if it was preceded by an argument, fight, or emotional outburst.

How to deal with a silent spouse?

Give Your Partner Space to Think. Avoid trying to figure out what your silent partner or spouse is thinking. You're not a mind-reader. The silent treatment is a passive-aggressive form of communication. If you do their thinking for them, they won't learn how to be direct when sharing their thoughts and feelings.

What is a good morning jellygator?

Good Morning jellygator so nice meeting you, just enjoyed your fascinating, detailed hub, you covered so many interesting situations about the heartaches of relationships. As well as ideas and possible solutions, relationships are something not always easy. An excellent hub for all those couples searching for answers. Happy to be following you. Linda

What does it mean when a man says he's busy but he acts disinterested?

In other words, "He says he's busy, but he acts disinterested" means he's probably disinterested. This is especially true if you called his attention to it and he hasn't tried to improve things and hasn't taken your complaint seriously.

What does it mean when your partner is silent?

In some cases, the silent partner is attempting to escape another toxic dynamic. If you are trying to force them to change or do things your way, you're giving them a reason to withdraw. If you criticize them as a person or assigning blame instead of focusing on finding solutions, you're contributing to the dynamic. If you let yourself feel like a victim, get depressed, or pout, you must recognize that you've been engaging in control tactics, too, and pledge to stop.

What is silent treatment?

The silent treatment is when one person in a relationship ignores the other person, refusing to acknowledge them verbally or through any other method. This usually happens after an argument, but it can also happen when the silent partner is angry and the other person doesn't know why. Being on the receiving end is painful and frustrating.

Why do introverts need more time?

Introverts need more time to process their emotions, especially when things get intense or they feel that they've been attacked or insulted in some way. If this is the case for you, tell your partner that you'll give them a certain amount of time to themselves and that you'll be back after the time is up to talk.

What is silent treatment?

The Silent Treatment Is Emotional Abuse. The silent treatment is your partner's way of telling you that you have done something wrong. As a consequence of this, he refuses to acknowledge or communicate with you. This is passive-aggressive emotional abuse.

Why do people use the silent treatment?

People generally resort to using the silent treatment as a means of placing them in a position of control (often because they feel helpless in the face of their situations, their feelings, etc.). A person may also use the silent treatment to avoid personal responsibility for his own actions or to suppress a partner's attempts at asserting self-worth. Additionally, he may be employing the silent treatment predominantly due to a lack of ability to properly communicate. Most likely though, it's attributable to a combination of the above factors.

What does it mean when your partner is ignored?

In doing so, your partner is attempting to induce feelings of powerlessness and shame. This is known as psychological or emotional abuse.

Is refusing to speak to someone without terms for repair a healthy activity?

As Schulman notes, 'Refusing to speak to someone without terms for repair is a strange, childish act of destruction in which nothing can be won'. Taking time out of a relationship can be a healthy activity, if done in the correct way and with the correct intent. You do it to save the relationship and not jeopardise it.

Is it normal to be silent?

Answer: It is never normal to be subjected to the silent treatment, which is a form of emotional abuse. However, don't confuse this with periods of 'cooling off' or taking 'time out.'. It is perfectly natural for couples to disagree and need some time alone to reflect and gather their thoughts.

Is silent treatment a form of abuse?

Answer: Yes, the silent treatment is a type of emotional abuse. Also, him referring to you as being, 'mentally ill,' is another form of abuse, commonly referred to as 'gaslighting.'. The latter can have serious implications for your emotional well-being. Remember, it is perfectly natural for couples to argue.

My girlfriend constantly gives me the silent treatment

DEAR DEIDRE: WHENEVER we have a disagreement, my girlfriend decides to give me the silent treatment.

Deidre helped me realise there was alternatives to suicide - thank you

DEIDRE SAYS: Your girlfriend sounds immature. The silent treatment is a passive-aggressive tactic people use in relationships when they want to punish or wound you, but it is emotional abuse.

How to deal with a silent partner?

Talk with your partner if you feel like you're beginning to give them the silent treatment or you think they're giving you the silent treatment. Agree to take time to cool down and then come back to discuss what's triggering the conflict when you're both calm and willing to listen to on another.

What is silent treatment?

The silent treatment is one form of "withdrawal" in a demand-withdrawal pattern, which occurs when one person asks or demands something, for example attention or affection, and their partner rejects these requests by refusing to engage or ceasing communication all together. "Marital therapists and clinicians have been dealing with this issue ...

Who said the silent treatment should be blamed?

Ed Yourdon on Flickr. The person giving the silent treatment and the person receiving it should both take some responsibility, Schrodt told The Wall Street Journal. One thing that couples tend to do, he said, is to blame the other person for the situation, which will in no way help resolve the conflict.

Who was the researcher who found that women were often the demanders?

Schrodt' s analysis encompassed studies on over 14,000 participants. In heterosexual relationships, he found, women were usually (though not always) the demanders while men were the ones who tended to withdraw from their partner's demands, or responded with silence. Ed Yourdon on Flickr.

Is silent treatment a response to conflict?

The silent treatment may be a common response to conflict in relationships, but it is also one of the most destructive, according to a paper published last year in the journal Communication Monographs. The analysis examined 74 studies that looked at the effects of an overarching behavior called the demand-withdrawal pattern.

Silence

I think I understand the reaction. Sometimes you just need to create distance between yourself and the offending party. But the silent treatment isn’t fair, and it’s harmful to both parties. For the one giving the silent treatment, it’s like drinking rat poison and expecting the other person to die.

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