when people say stupid things about cancer treatment

by Angie Terry Published 3 years ago Updated 2 years ago

The stupid things people say to those with cancer & their families “ It will all be okay, I just know it.” “Someday you will put this all behind you” (to a stage IV patient)

Full Answer

What not to say to someone with cancer?

When people say stupid things. Annanza Member Posts: 4. ... have been a couple of friends who I really no longer talk to because they were always negative or would intentionally say mean things. My fight it with the cancer and I don't have the energy or the time for people like this. ... I'm all done with the treatment phase now - thank God! ...

How do you deal with cancer bloopers?

The neighbor's 25-year-old daughter, mother of a 5-year-old, had died of cancer not long before. Judy was startled but could not feel angry at a mother who had lost her child. "Fifteen years later, we're still friends and neighbors," Judy says. Hurtful …

How can I help a cancer patient who won’t fight?

Feb 27, 2013 · My experience about “stupid things people say to those with cancer” was in regard to the fact that I decided against the modern standard treatment. I didn’t make that decision lightly. I went to school, so to speak. The last time I researched and studied this hard was during finals during my college years.

How did he choose to have cancer?

Aug 05, 2015 · stupid things people say to cancer patients Nancy over at Nancy's Point recently blogged about a phenomenon that many of us have to deal with post cancer: people saying stupid stuff to us. As Nancy points out, "There are way too many people telling patients how to feel, how to act, how to do cancer and yes, how to do survivor-ship."

What should you not say to a cancer patient?

Don't minimize their experience. Try not to say, "Don't worry, you'll be fine." You don't know that. Instead say, "I'm really sorry," or "I hope it will be okay." And don't refer to his or her cancer as "the good cancer." These statements downplay what he or she is going through.

Can cancer treatment change your personality?

A cancer diagnosis can affect the emotional health of patients, families, and caregivers. Common feelings during this life-changing experience include anxiety, distress, and depression. Roles at home, school, and work can be affected. It's important to recognize these changes and get help when needed.

Why do cancer patients get so mean?

Cancer patients simply want to be their old selves, Spiegel says, so they often can fail to make their new needs clear to their loved ones and caregivers, which can lead to frustration and anger.Jun 10, 2012

Do cancer patients get delusional?

They often occur within hours or days and may come and go. Delirium is often temporary and can be treated. However, in the last 24 to 48 hours of life, delirium may be permanent because of problems like organ failure. Most advanced cancer patients have delirium that occurs in the last hours to days before death.Apr 26, 2019

Can chemo cause anger issues?

Coping with Chemo Brain

Emotional and mental health challenges such as depression, anxiety, stress, and having trouble sleeping can add to that foggy feeling. Chemo brain can also intensify feelings of frustration or anger. That's OK. These feelings can be managed.

Is it normal for cancer patients to get angry?

Many people living with cancer experience anger. Often, the feeling arises when receiving a cancer diagnosis. But it can develop any time throughout treatment and survivorship.

Why do cancer patients push you away?

At times patients may pull away because they feel overwhelmed by the care they receive. For example, even when caregivers have the best of intentions when they encourage patients to eat properly, the patient may feel pressured and sense a loss of independence.Apr 15, 2019

What are the signs of a cancer patient dying?

Signs that death has occurred

Breathing stops.
Blood pressure cannot be heard.
Pulse stops.
Eyes stop moving and may stay open.
Pupils of the eyes stay large, even in bright light.
Control of bowels or bladder may be lost as the muscles relax.

May 10, 2019

Why do cancer patients cry?

Many people with cancer feel sad. They feel a sense of loss of their health, and the life they had before they learned they had the disease. Even when you're done with treatment, you may still feel sad. This is a common response to any serious illness.Nov 23, 2021

Does cancer make you crazy?

Confusion is the most common sign that cancer or treatment is affecting the brain. It is a common problem for people with any advanced illness including advanced cancer or those at the end of life. A person with mental confusion will think and act very differently from normal.

What are the signs that cancer has spread to brain?

Common signs and symptoms of brain metastases include:

Headaches.
Seizures.
Weakness in the arms or legs.
Loss of balance.
Memory loss.
Speech disturbance/problems talking.

What is the most common cause of death in cancer patients?

What were the leading causes of cancer death in 2020? Lung cancer was the leading cause of cancer death, accounting for 23% of all cancer deaths. Other common causes of cancer death were cancers of the colon and rectum (9%), pancreas (8%), female breast (7%), prostate (5%), and liver and intrahepatic bile duct (5%).

Sunday, August 30, 2015

Nancy over at Nancy's Point recently blogged about a phenomenon that many of us have to deal with post cancer: people saying stupid stuff to us.

STUPID THINGS PEOPLE SAY TO CANCER PATIENTS

Nancy over at Nancy's Point recently blogged about a phenomenon that many of us have to deal with post cancer: people saying stupid stuff to us.

Expect people to say stupid things

I was diagnosed just before moving from New York City to San Francisco. When one of my dearest New York friends heard the news, she blurted out, “But I won’t be able to make you casseroles!” I thought, “Yep, I’ve got cancer, but what’s really important is your casseroles.”

Expect huge emotional reactions from those closest to you

My husband has always been the rock of our family. He’s kind and consistent. He’s very slow to anger. An editor who covered both World Trade Center bombings, he becomes very quiet and focused in an emergency, the calm in the storm.

Be clear about how you would like to be treated

As I’ve said, it’s better to enlist patience rather than anger. But that doesn’t mean that you can’t be clear about what you want. If a colleague asks too much about your health, just say politely, “It’s a daily struggle, but I find it tiring to discuss.

Be careful of the kids

I tend to err on the side of openness, and not everyone agrees with this. We all have a different opinion on how much to tell kids.

Sunday, April 20, 2014

I have had lots of well meaning people say stupid things to me since my diagnosis. For the most part, it's not their fault. Unless you've had a late stage cancer yourself, you don't get it. Of course there also have been some comments that you would think common sense would prevent, but it doesn't.

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