Silent treatment is the refusal to communicate verbally and electronically with someone who is willing to communicate. It may range from just sulking to malevolent abusive controlling behaviour.
Full Answer
What does silent treatment mean?
Jun 08, 2020 · The silent treatment is a refusal to communicate verbally with another person. People who use the silent treatment may even refuse to acknowledge the presence of the other person. People use the...
When you should use the silent treatment?
The meaning of SILENT TREATMENT is an act of completely ignoring a person or thing by resort to silence especially as a means of expressing contempt or disapproval.
What is the purpose of giving someone the "silent treatment"?
Jul 11, 2016 · The silent treatment is one means for himto keep his targetunder his control. Not only does it enable the abuser to control his target, it also enables him to avoid discussing matters that he wants...
What are the effects of Silent Treatment?
The "silent treatment '' that is rightly condemned generally refers to the refusal to speak to someone with whom one must get along, typically because they are in the same household or workplace. Silent treatment is justified in this case
What is silent treatment?
The silent treatment is a recognized form of abusive supervision. Other forms include: reminding the victim of past failures, failing to give proper credit, wrongfully assigning blame or blowing up in fits of temper.
Where did the term "silent treatment" come from?
Origin of term. The term originated from "treatment" through silence, which was fashionable in prisons in the 19th century. In use since the prison reforms of 1835, the silent treatment was used in prisons as an alternative to physical punishment, as it was believed that forbidding prisoners from speaking, calling them by a number rather ...
What does it mean to refuse to communicate verbally?
Refusal to communicate verbally with someone who desires the communication. For other uses, see Silent treatment (disambiguation). Silent treatment is the refusal to communicate verbally and electronically with someone who is willing to communicate. It may range from just sulking to malevolent abusive controlling behaviour.
Why is silent treatment difficult?
In a relationship, the silent treatment can be a difficult pattern to break and resolve because if it is ingrained, relationships may gradually deteriorate. Abusers punish their victims by refusing to speak to them or even acknowledge their presence.
Why is silence a problem in a relationship?
In a relationship, the silent treatment can be a difficult pattern to break and resolve because if it is ingrained, relationships may gradually deteriorate. Abusers punish their victims by refusing to speak to them or even acknowledge their presence. Through silence, the abusers "loudly" communicate their displeasure, anger, upset and frustration. The consequences of this behavior on the person at the receiving end by silence are feelings of emotional hostage, incompetence and self-worthlessness.
What does silence mean in abuse?
Through silence, the abusers "loudly" communicate their displeasure, anger, upset and frustration. The consequences of this behavior on the person at the receiving end by silence are feelings of emotional hostage, incompetence and self-worthlessness. The silent treatment is sometimes used as a control mechanism.
What are the consequences of silence?
The consequences of this behavior on the person at the receiving end by silence are feelings of emotional hostage, incompetence and self-worthlessness. The silent treatment is sometimes used as a control mechanism. Their being 'silent' communicates a signal.
What is silent treatment?
The silent treatment is emotional abuse. When a victim is in a relationship with a person who causes the above mentioned distress, her mind and body remember how upsettingand anxiety provoking theprevioussilent treatment occurrences were.
Why is silent treatment not blatant?
The only person who really feels the silent treatment is the target. The person giving the silent treatment is not being overtly aggressive, abusive, or unkind in any visible way. This keeps himlooking “good” and reasonable.
What is silent treatment?
The " silent treatment '' that is rightly condemned generally refers to the refusal to speak to someone with whom one must get along, typically because they are in the same household or workplace. Silent treatment is justified in this case.
Does silent treatment help with relationship problems?
The silent treatment will not solve relationship problems Studies have shown that forgiveness relieves us from the burden of painful emotions such as anger, fear and bitterness and improves our wellbeing, while apologising has been linked to lower stress levels and a sense of being in control of one's life.
Why did Swenson give Rosenquist the silent treatment?
Privately Swenson gave Rosenquist the silent treatment for allowing his work to "serve the government" at the Sao Paulo Bienal, and publicly he accused his old friend of taking the "ostrich position.". In a particularly vicious swipe, he branded fellow critic Barbara Rose "our Marie Antoinette, with all that implies.".
What is silent treatment?
The silent treatment can happen in romantic relationships or any type of relationship, including between parents and children, friends, and co-workers. It can be a fleeting reaction to a situation in which one person feels angry, frustrated, or too overwhelmed to deal with a problem.
Why do people use silent treatment?
But some people use the silent treatment as a tool for exerting power over someone or creating emotional distance. If you’re on the receiving end of this kind of treatment, you might feel completely ostracized.
Is silent treatment always meant to inflict wounds?
The silent treatment isn’t always meant to inflict wounds. Sometimes, it’s an isolated incident that gets out of hand. You can let it slide until they come around and move on.
What to do when things escalate to emotional abuse?
When things escalate to emotional abuse, you’re not in a healthy relationship. It’s time to put yourself first. If you believe the relationship is worth salvaging: Set firm boundaries about what acceptable behavior is and how you expect to be treated.
Is silent treatment a form of emotional abuse?
Recognizing other types of emotional abuse. The silent treatment doesn’t always relate to emotional abuse. Some people lack effective communication skills or need to retreat into themselves to work things out. To emotional abusers, though, the silent treatment is a weapon of control.
Is silent treatment a weapon of control?
The silent treatment doesn’t always relate to emotional abuse. Some people lack effective communication skills or need to retreat into themselves to work things out. To emotional abusers, though, the silent treatment is a weapon of control.
Is silent treatment a good way to communicate?
While it’s not always malicious, the silent treatment certainly isn’t a healthy way to communicate. If the silent treatment looms large in your life, there are steps you can take to improve your relationship or remove yourself from an abusive situation. Last medically reviewed on April 30, 2019.
Who is Kipling Williams?
Kipling Williams, a Professor of Psychology at Purdue University who has studied ostracism for twenty years, explains, ‘Excluding and ignoring people, such as giving them the cold shoulder or silent treatment, are used to punish or manipulate, and people may not realise the emotional or physical harm that is being done.’.
Why is silent treatment called the weapon of choice?
Generally, it’s called on as the weapon of choice because it’s powerful and it’s easy to get away with.
Does ignoring or excluding activate the same area of the brain that is activated by physical pain?
Research has shown that the act of ignoring or excluding activates the same area of the brain that is activated by physical pain. The best predictor of divorce isn’t whether a couple fights – arguments are inevitable – but how a couple fights. The key to being closer in the good times lies in the way a couple treats each other during the bad.
What happens when a couple demands to withdraw?
It doesn’t matter which partner demands or which one withdraws, the damage to the relationship is the same.
What is silent treatment?
The silent treatment is a way to inflict pain without visible bruising – literally. Research has shown that the act of ignoring or excluding activates the same area of the brain that is activated by physical pain.
Does ostracism matter if you can't stand?
The ability to detect ostracism is hardwired in us – it doesn’t matter if you’re being ignored by a group or a person you can’t stand, the pain still registers. The silent treatment, even if it’s brief, activates the anterior cingulate cortex – the part of the brain that detects physical pain.
What part of the brain detects pain?
The silent treatment, even if it’s brief, activates the anterior cingulate cortex – the part of the brain that detects physical pain. The initial pain is the same, regardless of whether the exclusion is by strangers, close friends or enemies.
What is silent treatment?
The silent treatment is a form of emotional abuse typically employed by people with narcissistic tendencies. It is designed to (1) place the abuser in a position of control; (2) silence the target’s attempts at assertion; (3) avoid conflict resolution/personal responsibility/compromise; or (4) punish the target for a perceived ego slight.
What is the emotional maturity of a typical narcissistic person?
The emotional maturity of a typical narcissistic person is akin to a 5-year-old child who pouts and refuses to play with a friend in the sandbox because the friend wants to share the pail and shovel. The 5-year-old refuses to talk with the friend and angrily storms off to play on the jungle gym with someone else.
How to get rid of silent abuse?
Mystery. That could be the answer to your questions. I’m not sure the abuser has a good reason to use the silent treatment. Get to know yourself. Have a healthy self esteem. Continue to have love and compassion. Don’t let people change you.
Can children become narcissistic?
Children can become the narcissistic supply of an individual with signifiant narcissism. With that, typically therapy with a skilled clinician is essential as is healthy, consistent and nurturing social supports in the child’s life. Andrea. Reply.
What to say when someone is not with you?
No can be trusted with out a reason. Words are weapons use them wisely. Think three times before you speak. Say something in your head. Then speak it. Always make it sound good. ‘ My father died’ or ” my dad passed away.” Body functions are always a bad topic . And remember your time is important don’t waste it on deaf ears.
Can a parent use silent treatment on a child?
Yes it is. A parent should never use the silent treatment on a child. The damage is immense. I hope that if you’re doing this you will seek parenting support to find more positive ways of dealing with difficulties
What to say to a breakup friend?
Carrie,#N#I deeply appreciate your kind, encouraging words. Every bit of kindness helps exponentially, so thank you a million times. You are right, of course. I know it gets better. I’ve had breakups in the past, but they were mutual good-byes, see you laters, take good cares, I wish you the best, etc…..there was communication!
What is silent treatment?
The Silent Treatment Is Emotional Abuse. The silent treatment is your partner's way of telling you that you have done something wrong. As a consequence of this, he refuses to acknowledge or communicate with you. This is passive-aggressive emotional abuse.
Why do people use the silent treatment?
People generally resort to using the silent treatment as a means of placing them in a position of control (often because they feel helpless in the face of their situations, their feelings, etc.). A person may also use the silent treatment to avoid personal responsibility for his own actions or to suppress a partner's attempts at asserting self-worth. Additionally, he may be employing the silent treatment predominantly due to a lack of ability to properly communicate. Most likely though, it's attributable to a combination of the above factors.
Is silent treatment a form of abuse?
Answer: Yes, the silent treatment is a type of emotional abuse. Also, him referring to you as being, 'mentally ill,' is another form of abuse, commonly referred to as 'gaslighting.'. The latter can have serious implications for your emotional well-being. Remember, it is perfectly natural for couples to argue.
Is it a control move to ignore someone?
Ignoring Someone Is a Control Move. People generally resort to using the silent treatment as a means of placing them in a position of control (often because they feel helpless in the face of their situations, their feelings, etc.).
Is refusing to speak to someone without terms for repair a healthy activity?
As Schulman notes, 'Refusing to speak to someone without terms for repair is a strange, childish act of destruction in which nothing can be won'. Taking time out of a relationship can be a healthy activity, if done in the correct way and with the correct intent. You do it to save the relationship and not jeopardise it.
What is domestic violence?
Domestic abuse or Intimate Partner Violence (IPV) is any form of physical or sexual assault, stalking or psychological harm, inflicted by a current or former partner. As with most types of relationship abuse, the silent treatment usually begins rather innocuously. However, over a period of time, it escalates until it becomes a normal part of your relationship. While emotional abuse can be undertaken in isolation, statistics indicate that 95% of men who physically abuse their partners also use psychological abuse.
Why do people use the silent treatment?
People who use the silent treatment to win arguments and gain control need to understand the magnitude of their immature behavior. Confrontation lets them know that you see what they are doing and you understand the tactics they use. After telling them the truth, you can laugh about it.
Can you go to therapy for silent treatment?
If you are experiencing the silent treatment from someone you love, then therapy may be the only answer. This only works if your partner is willing to go to therapy in order to move forward. Unfortunately, so many people like using the silent treatment and don’t want a therapist taking that weapon away.
How to win silent treatment?
1. Shrugging it off. One way to understand how to win the silent treatment is to brush it off or ignore it. If you aren’t necessarily in a close relationship with the person who is giving you the silent treatment, you may be able to just move on and act like nothing happened.
What is selfish treatment?
The selfish. People who haven’t been taught to care effectively for others in a household will use the silent treatment on a regular basis. Selfish people care for themselves over others and when something doesn’t go their way, they ignore others to make a statement.
What happens when you are stuck in victim mentality?
So, when they are confronted with something they are doing wrong, they will grow silent and attempt to force their way.
Overview
Silent treatment is the refusal to communicate verbally and electronically with someone who is willing to communicate. It may range from just sulking to malevolent abusive controlling behaviour. It may be a passive-aggressive form of emotional abuse in which displeasure, disapproval and contempt is exhibited through nonverbal gestures while maintaining verbal silence. Clinical psychologist Harriet Braiker identifies it as a form of manipulative punishment. It may be used a…
Origin of term
The term originated from "treatment" through silence, which was fashionable in prisons in the 19th century. In use since the prison reforms of 1835 , the silent treatment was used in prisons as an alternative to physical punishment, as it was believed that forbidding prisoners from speaking, calling them by a number rather than their name, and making them cover their faces so they couldn't see each other would encourage reflection on their crimes.
In personal relationships
In a relationship, the silent treatment can be a difficult pattern to break and resolve because if it is ingrained, relationships may gradually deteriorate. Abusers punish their victims by refusing to speak to them or even acknowledge their presence. Through silence, the abusers "loudly" communicate their displeasure, anger, upset and frustration. The consequences of this behavior on the person at the receiving end by silence are feelings of emotional hostage, incompetence and …
In the workplace
Research by the Workplace Bullying Institute suggests that "using the silent treatment to ice out & separate from others" is the fourth most common of all workplace bullying tactics experienced, and is reported in 64 percent of cases of workplace bullying. The silent treatment is a recognized form of abusive supervision. Other forms include: reminding the victim of past failures, failing to give proper credit, wrongfully assigning blame or blowing up in fits of temper.
Tactical ignoring
Tactical ignoring is a strategy where a person gives no outward sign of recognizing a behavior, such as no eye contact, no verbal or physical response, or acknowledgment that a message has been read. However, the person remains aware of the behavior and monitors the individual to observe what the individual has planned and ensure their safety or the safety of others. It is similar to the silent treatment because tactical ignoring is a behavioral management technique t…
See also
• Cold shoulder
• Destabilisation
• Ghosting (behavior) also known as simmering or icing
• Guilt trip
• Isolation to facilitate abuse
Further reading
• The “silent treatment”. Its incidence and impact. Paper presented at the sixty-ninth Annual Midwestern Psychological Association, Chicago, IL. Ferguson, M., and .. 1997
• Kipling D. Williams Wendelyn J. Shore Jon E. Grahe. The silent treatment: Perceptions of its behaviors and associated feelings – Group Processes Intergroup Relations October 1998 vol. 1 no. 2 117–141
External links
• What's up with the Silent Treatment?
• Research: Office silent treatment ‘worse than bullying’
• The Silent Treatment: Are You Getting the Cold Shoulder?
• The Silent Marriage: How Passive Aggression Steals Your Happiness (The Complete Guide to Passive Aggression) [Kindle Edition]|