Treatment FAQ

silent treatment how long is too long

by Fritz Barrows Published 2 years ago Updated 2 years ago
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For instance, if you’re in a long-distance relationship, long spells of silent treatment can do more harm than good. Likewise, if you’re both busy and unable to be together, prolonged silence can drive a wedge between you two. In such a situation, the silent treatment will be effective only if lasts no longer than a day

Full Answer

How long can the silent treatment last?

Oct 23, 2021 · The silent treatment is used by the narcissist to exert control, silence the victim, avoid any conflict resolution, and to “show” the victim what they have done wrong. The silent treatment is a form of passive-aggressive communication because it doesn’t actually address the issue. The only person that has all of the information in this ...

How do you deal with a silent treatment?

Mar 24, 2022 · Silent treatment can be tormenting as long as it lasts. And it can last very long unless you put your foot down and decide to end it. How Long Can The Silent Treatment Last? How long a person can stonewall you depends on the person and the reason or the situation that led to such a consequence. It could be for days, weeks, or even months together.

What happens when a man gives you the silent treatment?

It’s a frequent occurrence and is lasting for longer periods. It’s coming from a place of punishment, not a need to cool off or regroup. It only ends when you apologize, plead, or …

What are the benefits of silent treatment in a long distance relationship?

Oct 09, 2014 · The silent treatment is a way to inflict pain without visible bruising – literally. Research has shown that the act of ignoring or excluding activates the same area of the brain that is activated by physical pain. The best predictor of divorce isn’t whether a couple fights – arguments are inevitable – but how a couple fights. The key to being closer in the good times …

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How long can silent treatment last?

If the perpetrator still refuses to acknowledge the victim's existence for long periods of time, it might be right to leave the relationship. In the end, whether it lasts four hours or four decades, the silent treatment says more about the person doing it than it does about the person receiving it.Mar 26, 2021

How long should stonewalling last?

This break should last at least twenty minutes since it will take that much time for your bodies to physiologically calm down.

How damaging the silent treatment is?

Experiencing the silent treatment denies basic human social and relationship needs. The silent treatment has been known to end romantic relationships, alienate friends, and negatively impact child development. When children experience the silent treatment from parents or caregivers, the effects can be devastating.Nov 27, 2018

Will the silent treatment ever end?

It's a frequent occurrence and is lasting for longer periods. It's coming from a place of punishment, not a need to cool off or regroup. It only ends when you apologize, plead, or give in to demands. You've changed your behavior to avoid getting the silent treatment.Apr 30, 2019

How do you beat the silent treatment?

How to Respond to the Silent Treatment#1. Dig Deep Into the Whys of the Situation.#2. Use the Sandwich Method.#3. Listen and Not Just Talk.#4. Do Not Try To Win the Silent Treatment.#5. Let Go of Your Grudge.#6. Be Strong.#7. Remember: The Recipient Doesn't Always Need To Initiate.#8. Give Space and Time.More items...•Jul 18, 2019

What type of person gives the silent treatment?

Research. Researchers have found that the silent treatment is used by both men and women to terminate a partner's behaviors or words rather than to elicit them. 1 In abusive relationships, the silent treatment is used to manipulate the other person and to establish power over them.Jun 1, 2020

Why is silence the best revenge?

Silence speaks volumes Believe it, the silence and zero reaction really bothers your ex, and they consider it as the best served revenge. Nothing creates more curiosity than silence. Your ex would expect a vent or an angry rant from you, but don't give in. If you do, you are meeting their expectations.Sep 9, 2019

What happens when you give a narcissist the silent treatment?

Essentially, the narcissistic person's message is one of extreme disapproval to the degree that the silence renders the target so insignificant that he or she is ignored and becomes more or less nonexistent in the eyes of the narcissistic person.Jun 2, 2014

Is giving the silent treatment immature?

At best the silent treatment isan immature behavior used by spoiled brats and manipulativeindividuals. At worst, it is a weapon used by abusers to punish their victims.Jul 11, 2016

Is silent treatment toxic?

Why the Silent Treatment Is So Harmful When you're on the receiving end of the silent treatment, you may feel powerless, disrespected, invisible, frustrated, or angry — or you may cycle through all of these emotions. “Many people feel powerless because we as humans are inherently social creatures.Mar 10, 2021

What does silence mean for a man?

Being silent prevents this sense of loss of our masculinity. The male feels he cannot win or might not get heard. We might feel we have less vocabulary, or that we might lose the argument. We might get angry and do something we should not do.

Why do men go silent?

Men can be silent when they're angry, happy, fearful, or sad! It's confusing for everyone. Partners, mainly women, experience huge concern, confusion and anxiety when they experience the silence and withdrawal of their partner.

What is silent treatment?

The silent treatment can happen in romantic relationships or any type of relationship, including between parents and children, friends, and co-workers. It can be a fleeting reaction to a situation in which one person feels angry, frustrated, or too overwhelmed to deal with a problem.

Why do people go silent?

But some people use the silent treatment as a tool for exerting power over someone or creating emotional distance.

What to do when your spouse is silent?

If it’s your spouse or partner, you both may benefit from couples counseling or individual therapy to learn better ways to manage conflicts. When the silent treatment is part of the larger issue of emotional abuse, don’t blame yourself. It’s not your fault.

What to do when things escalate to emotional abuse?

When things escalate to emotional abuse, you’re not in a healthy relationship. It’s time to put yourself first. If you believe the relationship is worth salvaging: Set firm boundaries about what acceptable behavior is and how you expect to be treated.

Is silent treatment a good way to communicate?

While it’s not always malicious, the silent treatment certainly isn’t a healthy way to communicate. If the silent treatment looms large in your life, there are steps you can take to improve your relationship or remove yourself from an abusive situation. Last medically reviewed on April 30, 2019.

Is silent treatment always meant to inflict wounds?

The silent treatment isn’t always meant to inflict wounds. Sometimes, it’s an isolated incident that gets out of hand. You can let it slide until they come around and move on.

Is silent treatment a form of emotional abuse?

Recognizing other types of emotional abuse. The silent treatment doesn’t always relate to emotional abuse. Some people lack effective communication skills or need to retreat into themselves to work things out. To emotional abusers, though, the silent treatment is a weapon of control.

Why is silent treatment called the weapon of choice?

Generally, it’s called on as the weapon of choice because it’s powerful and it’s easy to get away with.

Is silence a dignified response?

Silence can feel like a dignified, high road response but it’s not. It’s a way to inflict pain but without the physical marks. Being noticed is so close to being loved, that sometimes they feel the same. Being ignored is just as powerful.

How to get rid of the silent treatment?

2. Take a break. Familiarise yourself with a time-out (opens in a new tab). It’s a really useful strategy when you’re feeling too overwhelmed to think straight.

What does it mean when your partner stops talking to you?

If your partner seems to have stopped talking to you out of the blue or after a fight, clearly the two of you are having a conflict – even if you weren’t aware that you’d done something ‘wrong’.

Is silent treatment a sign of a toxic relationship?

At worst, it can be a sign of a toxic relationship. At best, it’s an unhealthy attempt to make upset and displeasure clear and to provoke guilt and atonement. The above steps will help you to handle the silent treatment with dignity.

Is the silent treatment good?

No, the silent treatment is seldom a good idea. When you’re using the silent treatment, you’re attempting to manipulate and control your partner or spouse. I can understand your resorting to not responding to your partner or spouse if they continue to batter your ears over something you really don’t want to talk about.

Why is silent treatment so hard?

Once you realize what it’s purpose is, it will often last longer, because it usually up to the victim/empath to do what is necessary to do what the person wants. They are trying to teach you a lesson.

What happens when you give someone silent treatment?

When you give someone the silent treatment you are in a sense emotionally punishing them and ultimately scaring them. In fact research shows that the brain deals with pain from silent treatment in the same place as physical abuse. Grasp that.

Why do people give silent treatment?

From "http://elyntromey.com/therapyblog": There are all sorts of motives for and styles of the silent treatment, but they all boil down to one commonality: people give the silent treatment because it gives them a feeling of control over the person they are treating with silence.

Is silent treatment the worst punishment?

Answered 4 years ago. Silent treatment is one of the worst punishments in the world and it works very well. But, you ought to understand, that its going to hurt the other person in some way.Hence, its not ideal, if its for someone you plan to be in a relationship beyond that. Now, you have to decide for yourself.

What is silent treatment?

Silent treatment is a flat-out refusal to ever discuss the issue —now or later. In other words, their silence deflects the conversation and communicates that the issue is off-limits. When this happens, the person on the receiving end of the silent treatment must continue to wrestle with their pain and disappointment alone.

Why do people use silent treatment?

Research. Researchers have found that the silent treatment is used by both men and women to terminate a partner's behaviors or words rather than to elicit them. 1  In abusive relationships, the silent treatment is used to manipulate the other person and to establish power over them.

Why is a victim silent?

There are also instances when a victim of abuse is silent as a way to stay safe and keep an already abusive situation from escalating. In these situations, the victim knows that saying something—even if their partner demands it—will only escalate the situation and lead to more abuse.

What to do if your partner is silent?

If your partner is unwilling to change, you may want to consider your options including breaking off the relationship at some point.

What does silent treatment do to a relationship?

When the person using the silent treatment takes away the ability to communicate and collaborate with one another, the person on the receiving end often will go to great lengths to restore the verbal aspect of the relationship.

How to use silence?

Use silence as a passive-aggressive way to control your behavior (e.g., you give in to demands or you avoid certain behaviors to avoid the silent treatment) Silence you when you attempt to assert yourself by refusing to talk. Use it as the primary means of dealing with conflict.

Is it healthy to be silent during an abusive situation?

In fact, it is completely reasonable and healthy to erect a boundary or remove themselves from an abusive situation. Staying silent during an abusive situation is not an example of the silent treatment. It may very well be self-preservation.

Why do people use silent treatment?

This helps to diffuse the aggression that one person is feeling. 2. You can understand your partner better. People who use the silent treatment as a method of punishing their partner can stay silent for days building a wall around them and behaving that their partner doesn’t exist. This is terrible for a relationship.

Why does silent treatment work with an ex?

Why the silent treatment works with an ex is because it gives both people time off to think about the consequences of their decision. The no contact rule after breaking up can do wonders.

Why is silence important in marriage?

Silent treatment could be beneficial and abusive too. Silent treatment in marriage is thought to be a way of punishing a partner and is akin to passive aggressive behavior. But it is not always as mean as it is made out to be.

What happens when one person falls silent?

If one person falls silent and disengages from the argument this not only helps in breaking away from the cycle of angry arguments it also helps to open a dialogue and reach a compromise. When one partner wants to resolve the situation you should readily get out of the silence and start talking about the issue.

Can you use silent treatment in marriage?

Some people use silent treatment all the time and that has an adverse effect on a relationship and on your loved ones. Using silent treatment in marriage is also more common than you think. However difficult, if you use it once in a while it could be beneficial to your relationship.

Is silent treatment good for mental health?

This will be better for your mental health and you will reap the benefits of silent treatment. There are people who become silent when in a negative environment and transport themselves mentally to a serene place like a meadow or a beach and deal with their negative emotions accordingly.

Can silence be abusive?

If you do not, then your silent treatment will become abusive. Silent treatment in marriage or in relationships does have its benefits if used in the right way. But ensure that silence does not get prolonged then it will become detrimental for the relationship.

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