Treatment FAQ

husband and wife in cancer treatment together how to manage that

by Patsy Wilderman Published 2 years ago Updated 2 years ago
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Be kind and encouraging. During a cancer battle, try to shield your spouse from extra stress. Be his/her cheerleader and a day-brightener, rather than focusing on the troubles looming ahead.

5 Ways You Can Help a Spouse With Cancer
  1. Communicate from the very start and throughout the entire experience. ...
  2. Help your spouse or partner get over the initial shock of a cancer diagnosis. ...
  3. Listen and give your loved one the space to react and reflect. ...
  4. Make sure you take care of yourself. ...
  5. Manage the logistics of treatment.
Oct 20, 2020

Full Answer

How to deal with cancer with your spouse or partner?

Sep 26, 2018 · Including your spouse or partner in treatment decisions is important. Together you can meet with your doctor and learn about common symptoms, your treatment choices, and their side effects. This will help you plan for the upcoming weeks and months. Help Each Other. Everyone needs to feel needed and loved.

Can a husband be a caregiver for his wife with cancer?

As with Ken, immediate action and treatment placed Jane well on the road to recovery, with breast reconstruction surgery scheduled for late October. Otherwise, their post-cancer treatment is identical; Ken and Jane are taking tamoxifen, a breast cancer treatment medication, for …

Do men leave their wives after breast cancer diagnosis?

Oct 06, 2017 · Spouses must take care to travel through the difficulties of receiving a diagnosis and treatment together. Let the spouse in treatment know that you really care about his or her thoughts and opinions on decisions regarding the treatment process. Julie told me that since the completion of her treatment, she actually misses the special connection she and Mike had. “He …

Why is self-care important for my wife with cancer?

Sep 08, 2018 · When committed, the husband as caregiver can play a key role in the wife’s direct care. As a husband-caregiver, you can have a huge influence on how your wife deals with her illness. Your care and...

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How can I help my spouse with chemo?

Ways to Improve Communication
  1. Share the Decisions. Including your spouse or partner in treatment decisions is important. ...
  2. Help Each Other. Everyone needs to feel needed and loved. ...
  3. Be Open about Stress. Some things that cause stress for you and your partner can't be solved right now. ...
  4. Be a Team. ...
  5. Make Dates.
Sep 26, 2018

Can chemo affect your spouse?

Your partner can get sick from chemotherapy or other drugs in your body, and cancer treatment can severely harm an unborn child. Talk with your doctor about preventing pregnancy and keeping your partner safe during your treatment. Facing cancer together might make your relationship stronger.

Can I sleep with my husband after chemo?

In general, sexual activity is fine during treatment as interest, energy, and comfort levels allow. Women may not feel up to sexual intimacy after surgeries or during chemo and radiation. Hugging, holding hands, and massages may feel good and be comforting.

How do you maintain a relationship with cancer?

Allow room for a “time out.” Cancer can cause feelings of anger and depression. Allow your partner to feel his or her emotions and be comfortable if he or she wants to take a moment alone. The end goal is to fight the cancer, not each other. Remain intimate.Feb 24, 2016

How do you know if chemo is killing you?

Here are some signs that chemotherapy may not be working as well as expected: tumors aren't shrinking. new tumors keep forming. cancer is spreading to new areas.
...
Along the way, the timeline may have to be adjusted due to:
  1. low blood counts.
  2. adverse effects to major organs.
  3. severe side effects.
Jul 31, 2019

What happens if you kiss someone on chemo?

You are reading this because you or someone you are caring for is receiving chemotherapy. Chemotherapy is strong medicine used to fight cancer. While taking chemotherapy, it is safe to touch other people (including hugging or kissing). However, special care is needed to protect others from contact with the medication.

How long does chemo stay in your body?

It generally takes about 48 to 72 hours for your body to break down and/or get rid of most chemo drugs. But it's important to know that each chemo drug is excreted or passed through the body a bit differently.Nov 22, 2019

What should you not do during chemotherapy?

9 things to avoid during chemotherapy treatment
  • Contact with body fluids after treatment. ...
  • Overextending yourself. ...
  • Infections. ...
  • Large meals. ...
  • Raw or undercooked foods. ...
  • Hard, acidic, or spicy foods. ...
  • Frequent or heavy alcohol consumption. ...
  • Smoking.
May 5, 2021

Can I get pregnant while my husband is on chemotherapy?

If a male has chemotherapy, could it affect fertility (ability to get partner pregnant) or increase the chance of birth defects? A male's ability to make sperm (sperm production) is often affected by cancer treatment. Sperm production may return to what it used to be after chemotherapy, but it is not guaranteed.Apr 1, 2021

How does cancer affect marriage?

Cancer did not impact significantly on women's overall marriage rate (OR 0.95, CI 0.90-1.00), but pronounced deficiencies were seen after brain and breast cancer (OR 0.62 and 0.74). Skin cancer elevated women's marriage rate (OR 1.27).

What makes a cancer woman happy?

The Cancer woman loves to get domestic, serving her friends and family home-baked goodies and tea. When she gets moody, she need to be comforted, or else just left alone. Like the crab this sign is symbolized by, she can cling — or pinch — when she feels threatened or vulnerable.

How do you show a cancer woman you love her?

Just make sure you're ready to be vulnerable.
  1. Exercise EXTREME patience. The Cancer man or woman is slow to move when it comes to matters of the heart. ...
  2. Be open and honest. Cancers are sneaky. ...
  3. Be sensual and affectionate. ...
  4. Make connections with their family and close friends. ...
  5. Give a damn.
Jul 6, 2017

How to help spouse with cancer?

Snyder gives some suggestions for how you can help your spouse or partner move through a cancer diagnosis and treatment: 1. Communicate from the very start and throughout the entire experience . Often, we don’t ask people what they need or want and at the same time, we don’t express what we need, either. Make a pact with your spouse ...

How to get rid of cancer?

Make time to pamper yourself through relaxing baths, reading books, taking walks and exercising. “While it can be difficult, it’s important to keep a sense of humor and laugh when you can,” says Snyder. “Know that it’s OK to enjoy life.”. Try to maintain your routines – everything doesn’t have to focus on cancer.

What does caring for someone who is sick mean?

Also know that people often say that caring for someone who is seriously ill is a deeply profound, gratifying and emotionally intimate experience, one that can strengthen your relationship and bring you closer.

What to do when your loved one is sad?

Most of the time, however, the best thing you can do is simply sit and listen .

Can roles alter?

It’s possible that roles might alter, too. You may have to do some things you didn’t do before, but be sure to cut yourself some slack on that.

Is Cleveland Clinic a non profit?

Cleveland Clinic is a non-profit academic medical center. Advertising on our site helps support our mission. We do not endorse non-Cle veland Clinic products or services. Policy

How to communicate with spouse after breast cancer diagnosis?

Upon receiving a breast cancer diagnosis, good communication becomes even more essential. Make time to connect and share your feelings with your spouse as well as to listen how your partner is feeling. If face-to-face sharing is too difficult, write your feelings down and share them through a letter, an email or a journal entry.

How many times more likely is a woman to get breast cancer than a man?

If you or your spouse has recently received a breast cancer diagnosis (according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, a woman is 100 times more likely to receive a breast cancer diagnosis than a man) or know someone who has, the following four encouraging reminders will help you and your friends as they walk this difficult road:

How to support your spouse?

Support your spouse in recognizing, identifying and expressing his or her feelings. Watching a loved one suffer can be difficult for healthy spouses. They may be experiencing anxiety over providing the support that their spouse needs. They may be fearful that their husband or wife won’t survive or that he or she will not be the same after treatment.

How to contact Focus on the Family?

You can contact us Monday through Friday from 6 a.m. to 8 p.m. (Mountain time) at: 855-771-HELP (4357) or [email protected]

What did Julie tell Mike about her radiation treatment?

Julie told a beautiful story about leaving the radiation center on the last day of her treatment: She walked down the hallway like a child knowing a birthday gift was waiting at the end. As she burst into the waiting room, Mike stood with his arms opened wide, waiting to embrace Julie in a bear hug. A friend had also brought her a large bouquet of roses. She and Mike had made it a point to celebrate anything positive — big or small — throughout their journey.

Do breast cancer patients want their husband to be attracted to them?

Many women worry that their husband will not be attracted to them after their body has been affected by surgery or treatments; however, partners of breast cancer patients usually want only for their spouse to survive and feel well.

Who is Erin Smalley?

Erin Smalley serves as a strategic marriage spokesperson for Focus on the Family’s marriage ministry, where she develops content for the marriage department. Smalley is also an author and conference speaker. She presents with her husband, Dr. Greg Smalley, at marriage enrichment seminars where they guide couples in taking steps toward enjoying deeply satisfying marriages. She also speaks to women on faith, family and the importance of healthy friendships.

How does caring for your wife help you?

You may find that caregiving enriches your life, and gives you a deep sense of satisfaction, confidence, and accomplishment in caring for your wife while she is sick , and especially when she is dying. You may also learn about your own inner strengths and abilities you didn’t know you had, and find a greater sense of purpose for your own life.

How many hours do you spend caring for cancer patients?

It takes emotional, spiritual, and physical strength. It also takes time — Primary caregivers spend more than 8 hours a day caring for cancer patients.

Why do caregivers take over the duties of a cancer patient?

They often have to take over the duties of the person with cancer in order to meet the needs of other family members, while still managing the caregiver’s own responsibilities. While the wife/patient is at home, the husband/caregiver gives prescribed medicines and then reports side effects to the doctor.

How many men leave their wife after breast cancer diagnosis?

When Mary was diagnosed with breast cancer, I felt overwhelmed. I didn’t know what to do, so I started with research. I was shocked to learn that approximately 25 percent of men leave their wife when they first learn of her cancer diagnosis, and 70 percent of men will leave within two years of their wife’s terminal prognosis.

What do caregivers do?

Caregivers often have to keep track of prescriptions, know which tests are to be done, and make sure all members of the healthcare team know of any changes with the patient. They also try to keep other family members and friends updated, and help to decide whether a treatment is working.

What is the role of a husband caregiver?

When committed, the husband as caregiver can play a key role in the wife’s direct care. As a husband-caregiver, you can have a huge influence on how your wife deals with her illness. Your care and encouragement can help your wife stick with the demanding cancer treatment and take other steps to get well.

How to forgive yourself for your mistakes?

It is important not to blame yourself. Find a way to forgive yourself and move forward. Try to keep a sense of humor about your mistakes. Most important: Try to recognize those things that you are doing well for your wife, for yourself, and with your family. These positives are too easy to overlook.

What is the best way to communicate with your spouse?

General communication tips. Good communication with your spouse or partner involves talking openly and honestly about your thoughts and feelings. It includes sharing your experience, listening to your partner, and accepting your partner’s thoughts and feelings without criticism or blame. Good communication is not easy and does not always come ...

Why is it difficult to talk to your spouse about cancer?

Talking With Your Spouse or Partner About Cancer. Talking about cancer is challenging because it involves intense emotions. Even couples who typically communicate well may have trouble talking about cancer. Discussing a cancer diagnosis may involve topics that couples do not want to discuss. This could include sexual problems, fertility concerns, ...

How does cancer affect a relationship?

Cancer changes the lives of both people in a relationship, and both require support. Here are some tips for talking with your spouse or partner about cancer, how it makes you feel, and how it affects you and your relationship.

What are the emotions of cancer?

Talk honestly about your feelings, both positive and negative. Emotions such as anger, fear, frustration, and resentment are normal reactions to cancer. Couples often do not discuss these emotions because they fear upsetting each other or feel guilty for having negative thoughts.

What is active listening?

Active listening means you concentrate on understanding what your partner is saying, rather than thinking about what to say next. For example, restate what your partner said in your own words. Then, ask for feedback to make sure you understand your partner’s point of view.

How to help someone who is having a difficult time talking to their spouse?

Getting help. If it is difficult to talk with your spouse or partner, you may consider meeting with a counselor. This person can help address communication problems and guide you through difficult conversations. Or each of you may choose to find a support group.

How to stop being angry when you are angry?

Avoid criticism, sarcasm, name calling, and insults. If you become angry or upset, using a calming routine, such as taking a deep breath or leaving the room for a break, can be more helpful than forcing yourself to continue. Do not rush the conversation. Take time to decide what you want to say.

Why is laughter important in a relationship?

While it’s a difficult season of life, laughing together through the darkness should be a vital part of any relationship. Laughter eases the ache of fear and combats moments of anxiety. Comedies work wonder on a weary soul!

Why is it important to bring the brokenness of cancer to the Lord?

Bringing the brokenness of a cancer diagnosis before the Lord strengthens the relationship and provides hope for the weary heart.

Why is knowing what to expect important?

Knowing what to expect each day helped ease our fear of the unknown, and helped us relax as much as possible during this season of our lives.

What did I learn from the uncharted territory?

Through this uncharted territory, I learned how to humbly love and serve my man like never before. Even though it was painful, our relationship has been transformed because of this trial, and we’ve come out stronger on the other side.

What does Psalm 147:3 mean?

Psalm 147:3. During a season of uncertainty, many turn to a faith in God even if it was not a cornerstone in their life before. Even if your spouse did not actively pursue a relationship with God before, many who face an illness turn to Him for help.

Who are Mike and Carlie Kercheval?

Mike + Carlie Kercheval are college sweethearts + have been passionately married since June 2000. They have been blessed with three precious children and are in their 15th year of homeschooling. Together they co-authored of the best-selling couples devotional, Consecrated Conversations ™. Mike + Carlie founded Christian Marriage Adventures ™ to help couples create their legacy with intention. They co-host The Marriage Legacy Builders Podcast and Legacy Marriage Builders Monthly Marriage Mentorship program.

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