Treatment FAQ

how to respond to the silent treatment narcissist

by Prof. Lupe Mertz Published 2 years ago Updated 2 years ago
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Schneider, Cikanavicius, and Health Writer Ann Pietrangelo all share keys ways to respond to a situation where a person thinks they are controlling you with the silent treatment: Ignore it until it’s blown over. Offer solutions. Don’t accept emotional abuse. Remember that you are not alone.

Full Answer

What happens when you give a narcissist the silent treatment?

If your partner is using the silent treatment, here are some things you can do: 1. Set boundaries – You deserve respect and if they aren’t willing to give it to you then there need to be consequences. 2. Don’t engage – Engaging with a narcissist when they are giving you the silent treatment will ...

Why do narcissists give you the silent treatment?

Don’t beg and plead to be recognised. Let their silence teach you something. Let this deadly silence teach you that you can carry on without them. Use this period of silence as a time to re-evaluate your position. Don’t waste your time trying to figure out what you’ve done wrong. I know you want answers but don’t chase them for any.

What does silent treatment by a narcissist mean?

Dec 13, 2020 · How to respond to the silent treatment It’s necessary to change your direction and start taking small steps in the right direction again. Ask yourself honest questions of what’s going on and you will slowly recognize the situation for what it is.

How to get a narcissist to break the silent treatment?

Jun 13, 2019 · I used to say it just fed my NarcX’s bottomless, black hole of an ego! The narcissist will read all your countless texts, emails and listen to voice messages…and he/she will ignore every last one! All your attempts at communication will be met with a deafening silence. The narcissist will instead get a tremendous amount of satisfaction from them!

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What is the silent treatment used by narcissists?

A very common form of manipulation used by narcissists is the silent treatment. When a narcissist uses the silent treatment, it can be a very draining and painful experience. It’s passive-aggressive and it can be very frustrating and result in a lot of stress and anxiety.

How to deal with a narcissist?

When dealing with a narcissist, you have to trust your intuition. It can be very hard to recognize you are not the one to blame, mostly because of earlier emotional abuse or experiences. Now, you can’t change their unhealthy behaviour and you’re not responsible for the behaviour of others.

What is silent treatment?

The silent treatment is a lack of healthy communication. Now, a narcissist doesn’t care about the feelings of others and might even like to play these manipulative games. A narcissist has a lack of empathy and seeks for narcissistic supply, which could be a search for ego-boosting, appreciation, drama, or control.

Is silent treatment painful?

When having to deal with the silent treatment, it can be a very draining and painful experience. It’s manipulative behaviour and a very unhealthy form of communication. From experience, I know how challenging it is to deal with narcissists and their manipulative behaviour. It’s essential to learn to protect yourself and your energy.

What is the silent treatment of a narcissist?

The silent treatment of a narcissist is almost like a self defense mechanism. When they are threatened, according to their psyche, to a compromise or a situation that they don’t want to be in, they will play their cards and want the other person to retrace their steps. The silent treatment is pretty similar to a bad breakup.

What is silent treatment?

Silent treatment is actually classified as a common form of emotional abuse, most likely to be deployed by a narcissist. It has been observed in most cases that the silent treatment is meted out to a victim when there is actually no fault on his or her part. It is purely the narcissist’s perspective and how they perceive a situation.

Is narcissism a personality disorder?

Narcissism is a personality disorder that stems from a person’s psyche. Narcissism cannot be imbibed or induced. It is self developed. There are many reasons why a person may grow up to become a narcissist, in which dysfunctional families and several psychological factors play an integral role.

What is silent treatment?

The silent treatment is a manipulative tactic designed to control another person’s behavior with silence. It involves. refusing to speak with someone. blocking their phone number. blocking them on social media. ignoring them in person. avoiding any interaction with them.

Why do people have difficulty communicating?

Individuals who have difficulty communicating because their emotional maturity has been stunted learn to give people the silent treatment as a form of punishment. These people usually operate from their ego, meaning that they believe in their rightness and are standing firm in their opinion, belief and/or experience. — Shirin Peykar, M.A. LMFT.

How do you deal with the silent treatment of a narcissist?

Not only is it emotionally exhausting, but it makes you feel like you’re completely worthless, and it can make you feel like you’re losing your mind! So what are you supposed to do when you’re the victim of the silent treatment?

Why Do Narcissists Give You the Silent Treatment?

It’s critical to recognize that while many people have times when they need to retreat to think about things, someone who cares about you will never use this abusive tactic to punish you. The silent treatment isn’t a tactic that a healthy person would use to manipulate you.

The Psychology of the Silent Treatment

In general, silent treatment can be intentional or accidental. However, sometimes it is used as a form of social control. At other times, it may indicate that the person has no respect for your value as a person and regards you as less than human. Regardless of its intent, using silent treatment toward others can have devastating consequences.

When the Silent Treatment Ends: Beware the Hoover

One last tip: when the narcissist decides the silent treatment is over, and they need your narcissistic supply again, they will do anything in their power to “suck you back in,” a move we call “the hoover maneuver .” Don’t fall for it – it’s not going to get better, and they’re not really planning to change.

Start Getting Help with Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Today

Online help is readily available for survivors of narcissistic abuse. Here are some options to begin healing from narcissistic abuse right away.

Why do narcissists use silent treatment?

Narcissists use the silent treatment as a tool for exerting power over someone or creating emotional distance.

What is silent treatment?

Psychologists consider the narcissistic silent treatment a form of abuse. It’s a popular form of mental torture used by narcissistic individuals, whereby they cut their victims off by not talking to them for extended periods of time.

What do narcissists do?

What narcissists typically engage in is an insidious psychological technique called “gaslighting.”. On a very simple level, it goes like this: The narcissist does something selfish, and you confront them about it. The narcissist then twists this event around to make it sound like you were the selfish one.

Do narcissists care about you?

But just try to drill this into your head: Narcissists really don’t care. This is especially true when they use silent treatment to punish you. They don’t have the same feelings of longing and remorse as you do after spending time apart. And they certainly don’t feel guilty about it.

Do narcissists look good?

Narcissists are experts at reframing reality in a way that makes them look good and you look bad. While it can be infuriating and confusing, don’t fall for it. Stick to your guns. The silent treatment is never a healthy or functional way of dealing with problems in your relationship.

Can ghosts have their cake?

Although you may feel an overpowering urge to leave the lines of communication open for them despite their ghosting you, it’s best to ensure they can’t have their cake and eat it, too.

Can you smell victory?

You can almost smell victory. And among the thousands of articles out there, all promising you instant results and an immediately healed life, one has caught your fancy. Just ignore the narcissist, they say. But there’s a problem. You’ve heard a lot of good things about ignoring a narcissist.

2 – Disengage

The last thing you want to do during the silent treatment is to reward the narcissist by engaging with them when they hoover after they’ve engaged in bad behavior.

3 – Turn the Narcissistic Silent Treatment into your victory cry

The third way to shut down a narcissist who is giving you the silent treatment is to use the opportunity to end the relationship and go no contact.

You Can Overcome the Narcissistic Silent Treatment

The bad side of staying in a relationship with a narcissist is that it keeps you stuck in a hopeless situation. Holding onto hope that the narcissist in your life will change is a pipe dream that leads to a wasted life.

How To Get Started On The Stages of Healing After Narcissistic Silent Treatment

Recovering from narcissistic abuse is hard, and it’s okay to admit you need help. If you’re ready to go deeper, check out the #1 therapist-approved online program for narcissistic abuse recovery. Thousands across the globe have benefited from this program that’s practical, proven, and reliable.

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