Treatment FAQ

how to put an end to the silent treatment

by Lew Bosco Published 3 years ago Updated 2 years ago
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  • Never beg or plead. It might stop the silent treatment for the time being but it will most definitely come up again.
  • Do not retaliate. It just escalates things.
  • Do not apologize when it is not your mistake. There is no use in putting an end to it like this. ...
  • Do not undermine yourself. You are not to blame for how others treat you.
  • Do not excuse the behavior. Please know that it is unacceptable and you always deserve an explanation.
  • Do not broadcast. Avoid talking to random people about the silent treatment. For instance, there are situations where sharing your personal problems further angers your partner.
  • Do not build a mountain out of a molehill. If you try to dig a little deeper, you might realize it is not that big of a problem. ...

How to respond
  1. Name the situation. Acknowledge that someone is using the silent treatment. ...
  2. Use 'I' statements. ...
  3. Acknowledge the other person's feelings. ...
  4. Apologize for words or actions. ...
  5. Cool off and arrange a time to resolve the issue. ...
  6. Avoid unhelpful responses.
8 Jun 2020

Full Answer

What is the best way to handle the silent treatment?

Jun 05, 2018 · When you’re wondering how to respond to the silent treatment, remind yourself that you are being mistreated yourself. Don’t plead with your partner. State clearly that you’re prepared to talk when they’re ready, and leave it at that. Don’t excuse their behaviour.

How long should I tolerate the silent treatment?

Oct 20, 2014 · Put connection first. Disagreements are easier to sort out if you feel like you’re on the same side. Pay each other a compliment, hug, make love or do something fun. It’s easier to talk when you aren’t attacking or avoiding each other. Sarah Abell is an author and relationships coach. Find out more at nakedhedgehogs.com.

What happens when you ignore the silent treatment?

It only ends when you apologize, plead, or give in to demands. You’ve changed your behavior to avoid getting the silent treatment. 1. Take a gentle approach: Make it about them. If this isn’t ...

When you should use the silent treatment?

The first step to ending the silent treatment is to recognize it for what it is —a tactic that, at best, works only short-term. True, not talking may quench your thirst for retaliation or compel your spouse to give in to your wishes.

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How long does silent treatment last?

If the perpetrator still refuses to acknowledge the victim's existence for long periods of time, it might be right to leave the relationship. In the end, whether it lasts four hours or four decades, the silent treatment says more about the person doing it than it does about the person receiving it.26 Mar 2021

How do you deal with the silent treatment with dignity?

Maintain your dignity and try these six strategies.Look for the reasons behind the silent treatment. ... Share the psychology behind silent treatment. ... Avoid reacting to silent abuse. ... Respond with calmness and speak kindly. ... State your boundaries clearly. ... Take care of yourself. ... Consider professional therapy.26 Apr 2021

How do you stay strong in the silent treatment?

How to Respond When Someone Gives You the Silent TreatmentWhen it's abusive.Make it about them.Make it about you.Ignore it.Offer solutions.Stand up for yourself.What not to do.Signs of emotional abuse.More items...•30 Apr 2019

Is silent treatment toxic?

Most psychologists indicate that it depends on the situation. When silence, or, rather, the refusal to engage in a conversation, is used as a control tactic to exert power in a relationship, then it becomes "the silent treatment," which is toxic, unhealthy, and abusive.1 Jun 2020

What is silent treatment?

The silent treatment can happen in romantic relationships or any type of relationship, including between parents and children, friends, and co-workers. It can be a fleeting reaction to a situation in which one person feels angry, frustrated, or too overwhelmed to deal with a problem.

Why do people go silent?

But some people use the silent treatment as a tool for exerting power over someone or creating emotional distance.

How to deal with emotional abuse?

Make it about you. Ignore it. Offer solutions. Stand up for yourself. What not to do. Signs of emotional abuse. Get help. Takeaway. If you’ve ever found yourself in a situation where you couldn’t get someone to talk to you, or even acknowledge you, you’ve experienced the silent treatment.

Is silent treatment a form of emotional abuse?

Recognizing other types of emotional abuse. The silent treatment doesn’t always relate to emotional abuse. Some people lack effective communication skills or need to retreat into themselves to work things out. To emotional abusers, though, the silent treatment is a weapon of control.

Is silent treatment a good way to communicate?

While it’s not always malicious, the silent treatment certainly isn’t a healthy way to communicate. If the silent treatment looms large in your life, there are steps you can take to improve your relationship or remove yourself from an abusive situation. Last medically reviewed on April 30, 2019.

Is silent treatment always meant to inflict wounds?

The silent treatment isn’t always meant to inflict wounds. Sometimes, it’s an isolated incident that gets out of hand. You can let it slide until they come around and move on.

How to end silent treatment?

The first step to ending the silent treatment is to recognize it for what it is —a tactic that, at best, works only short-term. True, not talking may quench your thirst for retaliation or compel your spouse to give in to your wishes.

What does the Bible say about silence?

The Bible says that there is “a time to keep quiet.”. ( Ecclesiastes 3:7) But when it is used as a means to retaliate or manipulate, the silent treatment not only prolongs conflict but also erodes the respect the couple have for each other.

What does the Bible say about spouses?

The Bible says: “Let each one keep seeking, not his own advantage, but that of the other person.” ( 1 Corinthians 10:24) If you think of your spouse as your teammate rather than your opponent, you will be less likely to take offense, argue, and then refuse to talk to your spouse. —Bible principle: Ecclesiastes 7:9.

What does the Bible say about marriage?

The Bible states: “Let your utterance be always with graciousness, seasoned with salt, so as to know how you ought to give an answer to each one.”. ( Colossians 4:6) This certainly applies in marriage! To illustrate: In a game of catch, you toss the ball so that it can be caught easily.

What is silent treatment?

Silent treatment is a form of emotional abuse. It’s a control tactic used to confuse the victim and cause anxiety. It is a form of manipulation and it hurts to be on the receiving end.

How to stop someone from being angry?

respond in anger, which can just escalate things. beg or plead, which only encourages the behavior. apologize just to put an end to it, even though you did nothing wrong. continuing to try reasoning with the other person after you’ve already given it a shot.

Is silent treatment a defensive tactic?

The silent treatment isn’t always meant to hurt you. Sometimes, it’s a defensive mechanism or they simply don’t know how to respond yet. While other times it is a passive-aggressive tactic to hold control over you. “In these cases, what they want is for you to feel bad enough to make the first move.

What is silent treatment?

The silent treatment is a manipulative tactic designed to control another person’s behavior with silence. It involves. refusing to speak with someone. blocking their phone number. blocking them on social media. ignoring them in person. avoiding any interaction with them.

Why do people have difficulty communicating?

Individuals who have difficulty communicating because their emotional maturity has been stunted learn to give people the silent treatment as a form of punishment. These people usually operate from their ego, meaning that they believe in their rightness and are standing firm in their opinion, belief and/or experience. — Shirin Peykar, M.A. LMFT.

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