Treatment FAQ

how to help someone with borderline personality disorder accept treatment

by Peggie Emard Published 3 years ago Updated 2 years ago
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One of the most effective ways to help someone with borderline personality disorder is to help him control his behavior. To do so, we must set limits and ask him to comply with these limits. To self-regulate and, above all, to understand the importance of sticking with treatment.

The following 9 strategies can help you support a person with BPD:
  1. Learn about BPD. ...
  2. Show confidence and respect. ...
  3. Be trustworthy. ...
  4. Manage conflict with attachment. ...
  5. Encourage Professional Help. ...
  6. Identify strengths. ...
  7. Have fun together. ...
  8. Take suicide seriously.
Mar 22, 2019

Full Answer

How to cope with borderline personality?

Listening to your loved one and acknowledging their feelings is one of the best ways to help someone with BPD calm down. When you appreciate how a borderline person hears you and adjust how you communicate with them, you can help diffuse the attacks and rages and build a stronger, closer relationship. Communication tips

What does it mean to have a borderline personality disorder?

One of the best ways you can help someone with Borderline Personality Disorder is to gently discuss the idea of seeking Borderline Personality Disorder treatment with them. This can be a tricky situation and, of course, the ultimate decision as to whether or not to seek BPD treatment is up to the individual.

What do you need to know about borderline personality disorder?

How to Treat Personality Disorder Therapy is the cornerstone of treatment for most personality disorders. One of the most effective new techniques is dialectical behavior therapy (DBT). It combines counseling with group therapy and training sessions. Patients are schooled in the arts of mindfulness, emotion regulation and distress tolerance.

What exactly is borderline personality disorder?

When addressing troubling behaviors with someone who has Borderline Personality Disorder, it is very helpful to avoid “you” statements and instead use “I” statements. For example, rather than saying, “You call me all the time when I’m working and you’re making it impossible for me to get anything done,” you can say, “It’s been difficult for me to handle my workload lately.

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How do you help someone with borderline personality disorder who doesn't want help?

Supporting Someone with Borderline Personality DisorderEncourage and Understand Treatment. BPD is not an easy condition to treat, but it is treatable. ... Show You Appreciate Your Loved One. ... Be Prepared for Mixed Messages. ... Be Responsive. ... Understand It's Not Their Fault.Jun 23, 2017

What is the most successful treatment approach for borderline personality disorder?

Psychotherapy. Psychotherapy — also called talk therapy — is a fundamental treatment approach for borderline personality disorder. Your therapist may adapt the type of therapy to best meet your needs.Jul 17, 2019

How do you accommodate someone with BPD?

Here are some general principles you can follow to be a good friend to someone with BPD.Educate Yourself About Borderline Personality Disorder.Support Their Efforts to Get Professional Help.Validate Your Friend's Experiences.Don't Ignore Threats of Harm.Take Care of Yourself, Too.Mar 25, 2020

What can you not do with borderline personality disorder?

“You're so emotionally unstable.” ... “Why can't you hold down a relationship?” ... “You don't need to get so angry all the time.” ... “Pull yourself together!” ... “You're so stupid, you spend all of your money without thinking about the consequences.” ... “It's like you have two completely different personalities.”More items...•Jul 17, 2018

Does BPD go away with age?

Most of the time, borderline personality disorder (BPD) symptoms gradually decrease with age. Some people's symptoms disappear in their 40s. With the right treatment, many people with borderline personality disorder learn to manage their symptoms and improve their quality of life.Oct 14, 2020

How do you calm someone with BPD?

The following 9 strategies can help you support a person with BPD:Learn about BPD. ... Show confidence and respect. ... Be trustworthy. ... Manage conflict with attachment. ... Encourage Professional Help. ... Identify strengths. ... Have fun together. ... Take suicide seriously.More items...•Mar 22, 2019

How do you respond to BPD silent treatment?

How to respondName the situation. Acknowledge that someone is using the silent treatment. ... Use 'I' statements. ... Acknowledge the other person's feelings. ... Apologize for words or actions. ... Cool off and arrange a time to resolve the issue. ... Avoid unhelpful responses.Jun 8, 2020

What is a good career for someone with borderline personality disorder?

Caring roles. Many people with BPD feel emotions deeply and find working in a caring role fulfilling. If you are an empathetic person, consider jobs such as teaching, childcare, nursing and animal care.Jul 5, 2021

What You Need to Know About BPD

People with borderline personality disorder (BPD) tend to have major difficulties with relationships, especially with those closest to them. The wi...

Recognizing The Signs and Symptoms of BPD

Recognizing the signs and symptoms of borderline personality disorder is not always easy. BPD is rarely diagnosed on its own, but often in conjunct...

to Help Someone With Bpd, First Take Care of Yourself

When a family member or partner has borderline personality disorder, it’s all too easy to get caught up in heroic efforts to please and appease him...

Communicating With Someone Who Has BPD

Communication is a key part of any relationship but communicating with a borderline person can be especially challenging. People in a close relatio...

Setting Healthy Boundaries With A Borderline Loved One

One of the most effective ways to help a loved one with BPD gain control over his or her behavior is to set and enforce healthy limits or boundarie...

Supporting Your Loved One's BPD Treatment

Borderline personality disorder is highly treatable, yet it’s common for people with BPD to avoid treatment or deny that they have a problem. Even...

What happens if you don't control your loved one?

This lack of control naturally leaves many loved ones feeling desperate and helpless— but it doesn't have to.

What to do if you don't live together?

If your loved one continues to cross boundaries or make you feel unsafe, you may need to find an alternate living arrangement or, if you don't live together, simply keep your distance from this person. Allowing their abuse to continue does much more harm than good—and not only for you but also for them.

Why do people refuse to get help?

There are so many reasons that people refuse to get help. Many are afraid of the stigma attached to mental health issues. Others feel they cannot commit the time and/or financial resources required to engage in therapy.

Is Borderline personality disorder treatable?

It is quite common for people with mental health problems to be resistant to the idea of seeking out treatment. Borderline personality disorder (BPD) is very treatable, yet many people with BP D deny that they have a problem or avoid getting help. 1 .

What is the treatment for borderline personality disorder?

Psychotherapy — also called talk therapy — is a fundamental treatment approach for borderline personality disorder. Your therapist may adapt the type of therapy to best meet your needs. The goals of psychotherapy are to help you: Focus on your current ability to function. Learn to manage emotions that feel uncomfortable.

What is DBT therapy?

DBT includes group and individual therapy designed specifically to treat borderline personality disorder. DBT uses a skills-based approach to teach you how to manage your emotions, tolerate distress and improve relationships. Schema-focused therapy. Schema-focused therapy can be done individually or in a group.

How to reduce impulsiveness?

Reduce your impulsiveness by helping you observe feelings rather than acting on them. Work on improving relationships by being aware of your feelings and those of others. Learn about borderline personality disorder. Types of psychotherapy that have been found to be effective include: Dialectical behavior therapy (DBT).

How to deal with a substance abuse problem?

Manage intense emotions by practicing coping skills, such as the use of breathing techniques and mindfulness meditation.

What to do before a doctor appointment?

Before your appointment, make a list of: Any symptoms you or people close to you have noticed, and for how long. Key personal information, including traumatic events in your past and any current major stressors. Your medical information, including other physical or mental health conditions.

What is the best treatment for personality disorder?

Therapy is the cornerstone of treatment for most personality disorders. One of the most effective new techniques is dialectical behavior therapy (DBT). It combines counseling with group therapy and training sessions. Patients are schooled in the arts of mindfulness, emotion regulation and distress tolerance.

How are personality disorders grouped?

According to the Mayo Clinic, personality disorders are grouped into clusters with similar disorders based on the types of behaviors patients exhibit. These are commonly sorted into groups:

How to tell if a child has personality disorder?

It’s sometimes difficult to tell the difference between childhood behaviors, teen angst and true personality disorders. When in doubt, it’s best to get a professional opinion. Talking to a child or teen before or after that stage can be daunting. The Ventura County Behavioral Health Department recommends the following: 1 Be mindful of labels. No one wants to be defined by an illness. 2 Learn as much as you can so you can pass on information instead of assumptions. 3 Focus on feelings and behaviors. 4 Emphasize they have a treatable medical condition. 5 Stay positive by choosing words like “challenges” instead of “problems. 6 If your child is on medication, talk with them about side effects they might be having. 7 Invite your child to talk to you whenever questions arise. The worst-case scenario is having to say, “I’m not sure, but we can find out the answer.

What is cluster A disorder?

Cluster A disorders involve eccentric thoughts and behaviors. These include paranoid, schizoid and schizotypal personalities. Cluster B disorders involve amplified thoughts and actions. Disorders in this group range from the aloof antisocial patient to the narcissist. Cluster C disorders are based in fear.

Can personality disorders be treated without a doctor?

Because personality disorders can manifest themselves in different ways, one type of treatment shouldn’t be hailed as the best or most appropriate without a medical evaluation by an experienced doctor . Work with professionals who’ve treated personality disorder patients in the past and have kept current on treatments. These are the best people to look to for opinions on the most effective therapies and medications for people suffering from specific conditions.

Is personality disorder permanent?

There’s a misconception that personality disorders are always permanent when, in fact, many times these problems go away with the right treatment. Alexander Chapman, PhD, president of the DBT Centre of Vancouver, notes that hospital treatment effectively cures 70 percent of patients with borderline personality disorder.

How do people with borderline personality disorder react?

People with Borderline Personality Disorder frequently feel attacked or misunderstood by others. They are highly sensitive individuals and can react with rage when they feel they aren’t being heard or acknowledged. Often the concerns, criticisms, and complaints of a person with Borderline Personality Disorder may seem petty, unreasonable, or unfounded to those close to them. It can be difficult to be calm and listen effectively if you are accustomed to lose-lose situations and react with anger yourself, or if you have learned that it’s pointless to try to argue your point or defend yourself.

Who is Randi Kreger?

Randi Kreger, the author of “Stop Walking on Eggshells,” will be holding a free lecture hosted by Clearview Treatment Programs in Venice Beach, Calif. Clearview Women’s Center provides Borderline Personality Disorder treatment centers for women. Click here for more information on Randi’s talk, and to register.

What is the book Stop Walking on Eggshells about?

“Stop Walking on Eggshells” is an essential book for anyone beginning to familiarize themselves with Borderline Personality Disorder and hoping to improve their relationship with the person in their life who has BPD.

What does it mean to be the go to person for BPD?

But for some individuals with BPD, becoming the “go to” person may also mean that you will become the one most manipulated and controlled.

Why do people use triangulation?

Triangulation (i.e., bringing 3 or more people into an argument) is often a “vehicle” used to either obtain validation from someone else or get attention. Most people seek validation from people they trust and this is healthy. But some individuals seek validation to feel supported in doing things that aren’t okay.

Does Psych Central review?

Psych Central does not review the content that appears in our blog network (blogs.psychcentral.com) prior to publication. All opinions expressed herein are exclusively those of the author alone, and do not reflect the views of the editorial staff or management of Psych Central. Published on PsychCentral.com.

Can you snap out of BPD?

Believe they are capable of “snapping out of it”: Individuals diagnosed with BPD are not able to just “snap out of it.”. They are being influenced by a variety of genetic, environmental, and social components that are also altered or influenced by personality, thought patterns, and/or learned behavior.

How to help someone with BPD?

In order to help someone with BPD, we must take care of ourselves. We can take care of ourselves by: Not isolating ourselves or building our entire lives around the person with borderline personality disorder. Not neglecting our health. Going to support groups with others who are in the same situation.

What are the symptoms of BPD?

They…. Have extreme mood swings. May idealize their loved ones just to devalue and humiliate them later. Have chronic feelings of emptiness and abandonment. Have paranoid thoughts or….

Is there a cure for borderline personality disorder?

It should be noted that, like many other psychological conditions, there is no “magic cure” for borderline personality disorder. There’s no infallible therapy to deactivate the roller coaster of mood swings, the fears and emptiness.

Is BPD treatable?

It’s essential to know all the symptoms and characteristics. Despite the fact that BPD is treatable, patients often avoid getting help or skip treatment. Therefore it’s essential that we encourage them to keep with the therapy and any medication.

Is borderline personality disorder complex?

Few personality disorders are as complex and debilitating as borderline personality disorder (BPD). We could talk about treatment, biology or psychology, but there’s also the psycho-social environment of the patient. Often, his or her family and friends don’t know what to do, what not to do, how to help and care for them.

What are the symptoms of BPD?

One of the most prominent symptoms of BPD is the debilitating fear of rejection, abandonment and isolation.

What is the stigma associated with BPD?

The powerful stigma associated with BPD labels us as inherently violent, abusive and manipulative. This causes many people with BPD to avoid speaking up about their disorder altogether, and the stereotypes demonize and often alienate those with the disorder. In reality, people living with BPD tend to be notably empathetic, passionate, ...

Does BPD affect friendships?

It’s true the symptoms of BPD tend to infiltrate friendships and relationships, but – like anyone struggling with overwhelming emotions, mood swings, impulsivity and more – a little effort goes a long way. Here are some tips for supporting someone in your life living with traits of borderline personality disorder. 1.

What are the triggers of BPD?

Each person is different, but common triggers for people with BPD include harsh criticism, the perceived threat of rejection or abandonment. Abandonment sensitivity may seem inconsequential ...

How long is DBT?

DBT is a year-long program divided into four basic modules — mindfulness, emotion regulation, distress tolerance and interpersonal effectiveness. It isn’t for everyone, but much of the content of DBT can be beneficial to anyone with or without BPD, and most of the skills, tips and tricks are available online.

Is BPD a stigmatized disorder?

Considering the stigma, the lack of sufficient research and the lack of public education on mental illness – especially heavily stigmatized disorders like BPD – it can be challenging to know how to support friends and family facing symptoms of BPD or even how to approach the subject of mental illness in a way that’s respectful and effective.

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Overview

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There are so many reasons that people refuse to get help. Many are afraid of the stigma attached to mental health issues. Others feel they cannot commit the time and/or financial resources required to engage in therapy. Some may not be willing to admit that they have a problem in the first place, or may not think that treatmen…
See more on verywellmind.com

You Can't Force It

  • Whatever the reasons may be, being the loved one of someone who is engaging in self-destructive behavior, hurting and manipulating others with their outbursts and volatility, and refusing to take steps toward change can be a heart-wrenching, defeating, and painful experience. In this position, many loved ones feel the need to do something that will convince th…
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Setting Boundaries

  • The fact is, if your loved one is an adult, you have no control over what they do or don't do at the end of the day. This lack of control naturally leaves many loved ones feeling desperate and helpless—but it doesn't have to. Whether it’s your spouse, child, parent, sibling, or friend who is exhibiting symptoms of BPD, there are steps you can take to set boundaries in your relationship …
See more on verywellmind.com

Support Your Loved One—And Yourself

  • There are several things you can do to support your loved one's recovery, and many of them include setting your own boundaries and not enabling your loved one's abusive behavior. If you believe your loved one is engaging in self-destructive behavior or is in danger of suicide, don't leave them alone. Call their doctor, therapist, or 911.
See more on verywellmind.com

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