Treatment FAQ

how long unil silent treatment works narc

by Christine Kuhic Published 2 years ago Updated 2 years ago
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Full Answer

How long does the Silent Treatment usually last?

Each silent treatment would last anywhere from two to three days to six weeks to six months before he hoovered back or before my begging at his door and endless onslaught of desperation letters forced him to give in. The Silent Treatment, for my ex and for many others, is a powerful narcissistic ploy and/or tactic and it gets the point across.

What is the silent treatment from a narcissist?

Narcissists are fond of using the Silent Treatment as a cruel (but not unusual) punishment for you doing nothing wrong at all and, from experience, I can tell you that the affect of this method of passive-aggressive control is sheer torture. The first time it happened to me, I felt as lost, sad, and helpless as the puppy in the picture.

How often does your ex-n give the silent treatment?

My ex-N of 12-years executed a narcissistic silent treatment, on an average, about every 3-6 months (and, during one stretch, even every two weeks), depending, I assume, upon how his other sources of supply were faring.

Is the silent treatment abuse?

If this sounds like your relationship, then you are being subjected to the silent treatment as a form of punishment, and this is most definitely abuse. So, how to deal with the silent treatment and gain the upper hand?

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What does silence do to a narc?

Essentially, the narcissistic person's message is one of extreme disapproval to the degree that the silence renders the target so insignificant that he or she is ignored and becomes more or less nonexistent in the eyes of the narcissistic person.

How long does silent treatment take?

If the perpetrator still refuses to acknowledge the victim's existence for long periods of time, it might be right to leave the relationship. In the end, whether it lasts four hours or four decades, the silent treatment says more about the person doing it than it does about the person receiving it.

How long does a narcissists silent treatment last?

It is nothing of the sort – the narcissist fully expects you to be the one to apologize, even when you've done nothing wrong. For narcissists, they use the silent treatment as a form of manipulation. They'll refuse to communicate for days, weeks, or even months.

Does ignoring a narcissist bother them?

If you ignore a narcissist and deny them their source, they may become enraged and try even harder for your attention – especially in ways that can be toxic or abusive. Ignoring a narcissist will enrage them because of their fragile egos. They'll feel humiliated and lash out against you to protect themselves.

How long should stonewalling last?

This break should last at least twenty minutes since it will take that much time for your bodies to physiologically calm down.

How do you make a narcissist miserable?

14 Ways to Make a Narcissist Miserable:Lack of Attention.Doing something they don't like.Losing.Logic and Facts.Boundaries.Critical Thinking.Spontaneous Behavior.Someone else's Success.More items...•

How do you outsmart a narcissist silent treatment?

Calmly tell the person that you've noticed they're not responding and you want to understand why. Emphasize that you want to resolve things. While it's not your fault that someone else decides to give you the silent treatment, you do have a responsibility to apologize if you've done something wrong.

How long does it take for a narcissist to come back?

Darlene Lancer, many narcissists can only sustain a relationship for six months to a few years (at the most). Keep in mind, though, we're talking about one four-stage cycle. Too often, a narcissist will initiate the cycle again, training their target to expect them to come back. Narcissists don't offer closure.

What does cutting off all contact with a narcissist do to them?

Breaking up with a narcissist is likely to be a draining experience. Either they won't let you go without a fight, or they will discard you without looking back. Both experiences are extremely hurtful.

How do you make a narcissist regret losing you?

How to Make a Narcissist Regret Losing You Cut off all contact with the person. Be unattainable and focus on your well-being. Spend time with your support network. Realize that people with NPD can't feel regret. Resist the urge to get revenge. Give yourself a chance to grieve the relationship.More items...•

What happens when you chase a narcissist?

Once you let your guard down, the narcissist strikes They'll start pulling away from the relationship to test your reaction. They'll start twisting the truth and blaming you for their problems. They'll invalidate your emotions over and over again until you doubt your own thoughts.

How do you confuse a narcissist?

11 Ways to Confuse and Disarm a Narcissist1 Be unpredictable.2 Say “no” when they ask for favors.3 Remove all emotion from your reactions to them.4 Bore them with the “gray rock” treatment.5 Guard your sensitive information closely.6 Walk away while they're talking.7 Cut off all communication.More items...•

How to deal with Narcissists?

If they happen to pass your way, then you can politely but firmly inform them that you aren’t interested in what they have to say. However, to get rid of them once and for all, you’ll have to resort to the silent treatment, a classic method of control. The best way to deal with a narcissist in this manner is to simply make yourself disappear.

What happens when you stand up to a narcissist?

They will try to make you feel like you are in the wrong for standing up for yourself, but remember that the only thing they care about is how you make them look. If you have a narcissist in your life, there is a good chance they have been making you feel victimized for a while.

What Happens When You Give a Narcissist the Silent Treatment?

This technique works because it makes the narcissist feel ignored and insignificant. This, in turn, will make them seek attention from someone else. The only downside to this is that you have to do it for a long time before it has any effect on the narcissist.

How to Deal with a Narcissist That Uses The Silent Treatment

Whether you’re dealing with an individual that you’re deeply in love with or someone you just met, the idea of walking away from a conversation that’s going nowhere can be daunting. But it doesn’t need to be. You can be assertive and say what you want instead of letting them dominate the conversation.

What does narcissist do when you ignore them?

In most cases, they don’t mean to be hurtful. Many narcissists genuinely don’t think they’re doing anything wrong. They’re just so obsessed with their own needs that they never think about anyone else’s. When they think you are ignoring them, they can’t control their temper, so they tend to lash out more easily.

Why The Silent Treatment Works?

The silence is important for two main reasons. Firstly, it stops the narcissist from being “the center of the universe.” By controlling what they can control, you’re able to get back at them for their behavior.

How To Give The Silent Treatment?

If you’re in a relationship with a narcissist, make sure that you say something nice and sweet to them before you give them the silent treatment. If your partner is a petty narcissist, they’ll probably respond with an even more petty response if you start this way. It might happen that if you are lucky enough you may get the silent narcissist.

How long does silent treatment last?

Each silent treatment would last anywhere from two to three days to six weeks to six months before he hoovered back or before my begging at his door and endless onslaught of desperation letters forced him to give in. The Silent Treatment, for my ex and for many others, is a powerful narcissistic ploy and/or tactic and it gets the point across.

What is the silent treatment narcissists use?

Narcissists are fond of using the Silent Treatment as a cruel (but not unusual) punishment for you doing nothing wrong at all and, from experience, I can tell you that the affect of this method of passive-aggressive control is sheer torture. The first time it happened to me, I felt as lost, sad, and helpless as the puppy in the picture.

What does silence mean?

The silence is meant to hurt you. It is meant to teach you a lesson. And, make no mistake, the silence is always a way for the narcissist to buy himself some free time for being with someone else or for hustling up new sources of supply.

Does silent treatment suck?

No matter how he goes about it or why it happens or when it happens, the Silent Treatment always sucks. The fact that the victim of a narcissistic partner rarely knows why they are receiving the silent treatment only compounds the mental torture.

What is silent treatment?

Silent treatment is actually classified as a common form of emotional abuse, most likely to be deployed by a narcissist. It has been observed in most cases that the silent treatment is meted out to a victim when there is actually no fault on his or her part. It is purely the narcissist’s perspective and how they perceive a situation.

What happens if a narcissist draws a line in a relationship that is not acceptable

If a person draws a certain line in a relationship that is not acceptable to the narcissist but is very rational, even then the silent treatment may be meted out. It may seem weird but even if the narcissist is at fault and has been confronted for the same, ...

How to deal with a narcissist who is threatened?

When they are threatened, according to their psyche, to a compromise or a situation that they don’t want to be in, they will play their cards and want the other person to retrace their steps.

What does it mean when a narcissist feels his or her importance is being diluted?

When a narcissist feels that his or her importance is being diluted, their control is being challenged or they are not being the most rewarded one in the relationship, they will unleash a barrage of various ways to make the other person feel insignificant. One of the most common ways to do so is to bring in the silent treatment.

What is the relationship between a narcissist and a coworker?

While there can be various types of relationships with a narcissist; a person may have a narcissistic boss, a narcissistic friend or coworker, it is the narcissistic partner that causes the most painstaking trauma.

Why is a narcissist incapable of loving?

A narcissist is a self absorbed person and he or she is incapable of loving someone truly because they are actually in love with their own selves. There is nothing and no one more important than them and thus a narcissist will always remain aloof from the emotional investment that the other person may indulge in.

Can a narcissist convince a victim to go to therapy?

Since the silent treatment is already imposed, it is unlikely that the victim will be able to convince the narcissist to opt for therapy or at least a consultation with a psychiatrist. As the only option, the victim should walk out of the relationship or take some measures which can break the narcissistic silent treatment.

What happens if you continue the silent treatment?

If you still continue the silent treatment, the narcissist may finally abandon you and move on with new narcissistic supply and new victims.

What is the silent treatment?

The silent treatment is the no1 weapon used by narcissists during which the narcissist acts as if you are non-existent and even refuses to communicate, even if you tried doing so. So, what happens when this silent-treatment is reversed?

How long does it take for a narcissist to come back to you?

Unable to feel being ignored, his inflated ego starts hitting him harder and harder. So, after giving silent treatment for a few weeks , the narcissist will likely come back to you. He may start chasing you so that he can get back his narcissistic supply like before.

Why does a narcissist block you?

The Narcissist may even block you on all his social media accounts and try to act extra friendlier with others, so that he can get more eyeballs from you. His routine bragging and show-off start to begin, just to show you that he is the most valuable person and prove that you are missing a great treasure ignoring him.

Do narcissists beg you?

While some narcissists may beg and request you while some others may shout and begin a fight with you. The hurt ego of the narcissist makes him vulnerable and pushes him to do weird things just ...

Can a narcissist demean you?

In fact, it is not uncommon for a narcissist to demean you or abuse you in front of others and even at the back of you. Also, the narcissist may replace you with another person, just to trigger emotions of jealousy in you. As more and more days pass by, more signs will start to appear. All with the motive to grab your attention at any cost.

Can a narcissist live without talking to you?

The narcissist may even believe that you can’t live without talking to the narcissist. So, when days start to pass by and if you still continue to give the silent treatment to the narcissist, the actual drama start to begin..

What happens when a narcissist uses the silent treatment against you?

When a narcissist uses the silent treatment against you, he or she is playing an emotional game of chicken with your mind. You will be tempted to reach out and speak first. When you do, the narcissist will have considered your reconciliation action a form of “ flinching.”. In their gamebook, they win, and you lose.

Why do narcissists use silent treatment?

Narcissists use the silent treatment as a tool for exerting power over someone or creating emotional distance.

What do narcissists do?

What narcissists typically engage in is an insidious psychological technique called “gaslighting.”. On a very simple level, it goes like this: The narcissist does something selfish, and you confront them about it. The narcissist then twists this event around to make it sound like you were the selfish one.

What is silent treatment?

Psychologists consider the narcissistic silent treatment a form of abuse. It’s a popular form of mental torture used by narcissistic individuals, whereby they cut their victims off by not talking to them for extended periods of time.

Do narcissists look good?

Narcissists are experts at reframing reality in a way that makes them look good and you look bad. While it can be infuriating and confusing, don’t fall for it. Stick to your guns. The silent treatment is never a healthy or functional way of dealing with problems in your relationship.

Do narcissists care about you?

But just try to drill this into your head: Narcissists really don’t care. This is especially true when they use silent treatment to punish you. They don’t have the same feelings of longing and remorse as you do after spending time apart. And they certainly don’t feel guilty about it.

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